Twilight After Dawn Winternight
by Lythya
Summary: After the almost-fight with the Volturi, life goes on like before, only so much more different. Many years passes by, and things start to happen again, just as it was predicted years ago. Takes place after Breaking Dawn. Read and review.
1. Chapter 1

Another fanfic I've been writing on ever since Breaking Dawn stopped, and I've written about a hundred pages – it's far from finished! I know what's going to happen in it. It's going to be quite dramatic. Please read and review :)

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Winternight

First part

PREFACE

I hadn't expected my incredibly bad luck to follow me into immortality, though I should have known. Carlisle's theory about vampires pulling their traits into their new life, making it stronger, should have warned me. Since my clumsiness had not followed me, I hadn't figured my bad luck would.

I hadn't figured it could possibly be any worse. But it was, and once again, I had put my family in danger. Possibly for the very last time.

I watched with what I would believe to be a pale face, even paler than usual, as the moon stroked up from behind the mountains and buried everything in white.

EXPLAINING

It was snowing. A thick layer had already imprisoned the earth. My hand held my daughter's. Renesmee.

I smiled. After I had begun calling her Nessie, like everyone else, she had, by touching my cheek, told me that she didn't like it. She liked that I was the only one calling her Renesmee. It was a feeling she couldn't quite describe.

It had only been almost two years since the Volturi had decided to leave us alone – for now. She still clung to Edward and I like clue. She had been terribly heartbroken – like myself – that I had told her to leave me.

Edward, holding her other hand, suddenly hissed. I immediately looked warily at him, but he refused to look at me.

"What's wrong?" I asked deliberately.

Renesmee looked up at me, and I looked back into her eyes. There was something there, and I understood that it was her thoughts that had made Edward react like this.

"What's wrong?" I asked again, this time for my little girl.

She had really grown. She was almost on the size of a sixth year old girl now. Her hair, the color of her fathers, curled around her face, her neck. She was so beautiful.

She reached for me, but because she was unwilling to let go of Edward's hand, I had to bend down for her to touch my cheek. A picture of me and Edward, but not Edward and the _vampire_ me, but the _human_ me. I suddenly understood what she wanted, and I flinched away, like Edward.

She did have the right to know how it had all happened. But was she ready to know that the guy she cared for so much – Jacob – had once been in love with her mother in a whole different way than he should?

I stopped them both, reaching my left hand to my temples. I concentrated on pulling my shield together so that Edward could hear my thoughts. Though I had closed my eyes, I could feel his stare.

_Is she ready? What with the whole Jacob thing?_

I could hear him coming closer, so I opened my eyes, and the shield was in place again. I couldn't hold it back for long. It wanted to protect me, and therefore, it fought against me. That _was_ good, but sometimes annoying, because Edward still was only starting to get used to sometimes hearing my thoughts, and he always reacted with kissing me, which made me lose it.

He bend over me, his lips at my ear. The sweet sensation of desire still hadn't gone – never would. It was still just as strong as when I pulled myself out of the fire that had changed me.

Though I never wanted to let go of this desire, I did wish I would soon be able to control it.

He whispered, too low for Renesmee's ears to hear. She was, after all, half human.

"We'll tell her the beginning. She can know the rest when she's old enough to understand."

I nodded seriously. I was suddenly aware of my daughter looking at us with a heartbroken look in her eyes. How could anyone not give her what she wanted?

Edward stepped back, loosening her hand, which made her even more confused. I immediately feared that she thought Edward was angry and would go. But I pulled her into my arms, and Edward was at my side at once, laying his arm around me.

I bit my lip and looked for Edward to begin. We started walking through the forest again.

"What about you told her? I'll fill in the holes," Edward suggested. Renesmee's face lit up with a smile as she understood that we would tell her.

I sighed. "Fine," I grumbled and gave him a dark look. He just smiled his crooked smile, which made me smile.

"Okay. Hmm." I thought about it. "Well, I had decided to come live with Charlie, Grandpa, to give Renée, Grand mom, the freedom to travel with her new husband, Phil, around to his football games.

"I never did like the cold or the rain, so Forks was some hard trial." I cringed. "My first day was terrible. I hated the people staring at me – "

"You _still_ hate people staring at you," Edward corrected, and I rolled my eyes.

"Anyway, I was with a girl called Jessica in the canteen when I saw them." Edward suddenly grinned hugely. He had made me show him this memory so many times, he knew it too well. Probably better than me.

"I was pulled into the curiosity at once. Why were they so pale? So beautiful?" I shook my head. "I asked Jess. She told me about them – the _Cullens_." Renesmee smiled, eyes wide with a thrill. I smiled back at her. "She told me their names. I stared at them some more. Suddenly, as Jess said their names, the boy with the bronze hair looked up." Renesmee shrieked. Edward laughed. "He caught me looking, and I immediately looked away, blushing."

"Such a lovely color," Edward murmured to himself, looking at me. If I wasn't a vampire, that would have made me blush, and he knew without reading my thoughts.

"Well, when the boy looked away, I asked Jess what the boy with the reddish-brown hair was called. She told me: 'Oh, that's Edward. He's gorgeous, of course, but he doesn't date.'" Edward burst into a loud laughter. I could hear Renesmee's heart going quicker. "A girl named Angela walked me to my next class. Biology.

"There was only one seat free. The one at Edward Cullen's table."

Before I could go on, Edward picked up the line. "I of course felt very sorry for the human girl who was forced to sit at my side. Humans didn't like to be close to us. But as she walked by, I felt my throat rip up with thirst. She smelled so _good_." We both cringed, and Renesmee looked from one to another.

"What happened?" she asked in a small voice.

He grinned. "I had never smelled anything so good. You can imagine what I wanted. But I simply couldn't do that to Carlisle. So I fought a whole _hour_ against the thirst. You remember Tanya, Kate, Carmen and Eleazar, right?" She nodded. "Well, I took off to visit them. I wouldn't slip. I wouldn't kill the Swan girl."

I grinned. "I, of course, felt stupidly self conscious, unable to not feel guilty for Edward Cullen's absence. I wondered about how he could hate me so quickly. I remembered the dark glance he had sent me that first day in Biology. He didn't show up for a long time," I told her. "Then one day – he was there. He introduced himself. I felt stunned that he was talking to me. 'I didn't get the chance to introduce myself last time'." I send Edward a teasing look. "Of course you didn't." He grinned.

Renesmee looked fascinated at us. I touched her cheek with a smile.

"I tried to make small-talk with the girl," Edward continued the story. "But I found myself caught by her reactions, her immunity to my mindreading." He sighed and played with a stray of my hair.

"The next day, a van got out of hand and screeched over the parking lot towards me." Edward flinched. "Suddenly, Edward Cullen, who had surely been standing at the other end of the lot, was at my side, stopping the van, leaving a mark of his hands in the car's side." I shrugged. "He said I had hit my head pretty bad. Probably trying to make me think I was hallucinating." I send Edward a sour look, but I couldn't manage to hold it, and I grinned at him, once again.

"Dr. Cullen told me I was good to go. He seemed suddenly absentminded and busy when I mentioned how lucky it was that Edward had been at my side." Edward chuckled. I paused, listening to the fantastic sound of his voice. Surely, there could be no sound so beautiful. "I wanted to talk with Edward, but he didn't want to talk with me."

"Still, you seduced me to go with you," he sighed. I smiled triumphantly at him.

"He didn't want to tell me what had happened, told me I didn't make sense. Wanted to know why I wanted to know, when I told I wasn't going to tell anybody. He seemed to struggle to understand me …"

"Then, she asked me why I had saved her," Edward whispered, looking into Renesmee's eyes. "I told her I didn't know."

Renesmee seemed to really like the story. She reached for my cheek, and I willingly let her. A picture of how she emarginated it. Both Edward and I chuckled. In Renesmee's mind, we both looked happy, looked at each other like we loved the other one more than the world. It seemed she couldn't quite put it together with our story of how we reacted toward each other.

"Oh, but dear, you haven't quite got it right." She frowned, and I explained: "Well, back then, we didn't look that way at each other. I remember Edward looking rather angry, and, in the end, lost."

"You looked very much that way, too, you know," he assured me. I nudged him with my shoulder, glad, still, that I could make him sway. Renesmee frowned. She touched my cheek again. She still couldn't make it fit.

"Renesmee," I said, "we didn't love each other back then."

Edward hissed in disagreement.

"Oh, please!" I rolled my eyes.

"I did love you from the first moment."

"Sure you did."

"I'll prove it!" he mumbled.

"Bring it on!"

"When Jessica said 'He doesn't date', her thought wasn't the friendliest. I felt an urge to protect you from the thoughts that you couldn't hear."

I stared blankly at him. "Well, dang it!" I half grumbled, half shouted. Renesmee laughed, which made me in a better mood.

"Well, you were kind of caught up by me from the very first moment," he reminded me teasingly. I rolled my eyes. "But I'll agree that we didn't exactly _behave_ as if we already felt that way."

I nodded. Renesmee sighed. She still couldn't follow.

I looked warily at her. "Maybe you aren't old enough to understand," I suggested, but she stiffened. She reached for my cheek after a few seconds of silence. I didn't really see anything this time, just felt. Felt that this question about her mom and dad's first time together had annoyed her for a long time.

I sighed. How to go on?

"I decided to ignore her," Edward helped me, smiling as Renesmee stared at him. I could see that she was glad she already knew what it would all end with. She placed her hand against my cheek again, and this time, I knew it for sure. She kept the hand there, sharing every thought and emotion with me. "I decided I couldn't bring my family in more danger. Emmet, Rosalie and Jasper agreed. They thought it was time to make sure she wouldn't say _anything_." He cringed. I felt shock and horror go through Renesmee's little body. And something else. I remembered back to the first day I'd been a vampire. She had showed me how she felt about Jacob, how she _owned_ him. I felt that again – only it was _my_ face this time. She pushed herself closer to me and looked around, as if some danger would come. I understood that she wanted to _protect_ me, and that made both Edward and me laugh. She stared at us, confused, yet again.

"Alice and Carlisle was on my side. Esme said I should do whatever in course of me staying. The fight didn't end in Bella's dead," he shuddered, "but there was no way I could interfere with the human anymore."

I caught up the line as if I could read his thoughts. "Then, girl's choice spring dance was coming. Mike Newton asked me if I was going to ask him. I immediately made myself an alibi. I said I was going to Seattle."

Edward muffled a laugh. "Your mother wasn't too good on the feet back then," he told our daughter.

I ignored him. "Mike had asked me in Biology, and, of course, Edward had heard him. At the end of class, he said:"

"Bella?" he repeated himself from back then perfectly. I laughed.

"What? Are you speaking to me again?" My voice was exactly as it had been back then; petulance thick and clearly.

"No, not really," Edward said.

"Then what do you want, Edward?"

"I'm sorry. I'm being very rude, I know. But it's better this way, really."

"I don't know what you mean," I answered, still the perfect voice from back then – though now, my voice had that bell-like sound chasing every word. I would never have gotten peace from the boys in high school if I had had this voice.

"It's better if we're not friends. Trust me."

"it's too bad you didn't figure that out earlier. You could have saved yourself all this regret." As I said the words, I remembered too clearly the feeling from back then. The annoyance.

"Regret? Regret for what?" I wanted to laugh at the way his tone was exactly as confused as back then.

"For not just letting that stupid van squish me."

There was a pause – exactly like back then. With Edward saying all the words on his part, and me saying mine, it felt like a clearer memory.

"You think I regret saving your life?" he asked in that funny mad voice. Renesmee cringed, and I brushed her hair back.

"I _know_ you do," I snapped.

"You don't know anything."

We both stopped talking for a second, long enough to remember what happened next. "I walked angrily for the door, wanting to sweep out the room dramatically." I sighed. "But, as the week and clumsy human I was, I tripped, and all my books were at the floor."

"I quickly gathered her books together before she could even bend down."

"'Thank you', I said. 'You're welcome'." I shook my head. "You really owe me for the next you did." I frowned.

He laughed, and Renesmee looked expectantly at us. Through her hand, I felt her curiosity.

So I continued. "After Gym I hurried to the parking lot. I sat in my car, ready to go home. Then, Edward swept out in front of my. His family was still at the cafeteria. Then Tyler came to my car. We were both captured behind Edward. 'Sorry, I'm stuck behind Cullen'." I shook my head. "It wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for you," I accused.

He chuckled. "Of course it would."

I rolled my eyes. "Well, Tyler – the third person that day – asked me to the dance. After turning him down, I saw Edward laugh in the back mirror."

Renesmee suddenly turned toward her dad. "Why?" she asked blankly.

He bend down and smiled at her. "To see how your mother would react."

Bothe Renesmee and I shook our heads. Edward grinned. A new picture formed in my head. Renesmee was impatient to hear more.

Edward and I hesitated, knowing one detail would be missed. His first nightly visit.

"The next day, Edward told me he was giving up being good, and that he was breaking all the rules."

"The last part I said later," he corrected.

I shrugged. "Who cares?" Renesmee touched my cheek and answered me. I smiled at her. "Sorry, dear."

"I asked her to sit at my table at lunch," he said, but we both froze as Renesmee cried out her comment to this act. Through her hand, I felt her shock, the picture of me, suddenly sitting beside Jasper, Rosalie and Emmet – those who had told Edward to silence me.

"Edward and I didn't sit at their table," I whispered and kissed her forehead. Through her hand, she told me this was something we should have told her right away.

Edward smiled. "Well, Bella came to sit in front of me, though her friends was very much against it. Especially Mike." He sniggered. "At one point, I asked her what she was thinking. She answered; 'I'm trying to figure out what you are'. I was scared that she might have found out, but when I asked, she –" I snorted angrily, and he stopped. Then he laughed loudly. "Bella, you can't keep that from her!"

"Watch me!" I growled and got a good hold on Renesmee before I started running. I heard Edward laugh behind me, Renesmee shriek in my arms, the snow falling around me being lightly pushed in a new direction as I blurred on through the woods.

But Edward was quickly and caught up easily. I growled and got to a stop, turned around and ran in the other direction. Surely, that wouldn't work again, but it would hold my stupidity from my daughter just a little while longer. I knew Edward wouldn't tell her if it hurt me, and I knew Renesmee would beg for me to tell her.

And I would give in.

I sighed, and my running grew to an abruptly stop. Renesmee clung to my neck, shaking. She couldn't run this fast herself, and, usually, I didn't run like this – like a maniac. I sighed again, and then, Edward was at my side, his arms around me at once.

"Sorry, dear, I won't tell if you don't like me to," he whispered, and his lips were in my hair. I cringed as Renesmee with a low cry touched my cheek, as I had known she would, and begged me.

I tried to fight against it, but I couldn't. I just nodded once and gave her to Edward. Edward looked curiously at me as I turned around and ran into the forest. Renesmee cried again, this time a real one. I stopped only a hundred meters away. I could hear them – I just didn't want to _see_ them. I was positive that my daughter would laugh when she heard what was coming.

Edward told her I was near. Then he answered the question I knew she asked through her touch.

Silence.

I turned around to go back, to see if something had happened. But then I froze. Renesmee babbled laughter, and soon enough, Edward laughed, too.

I growled and slowly came back. The second I was in view again, my frown clearly visible on my face, Renesmee pointed me out to Edward and laughed.

"Yea, I'm hilarious," I mumbled and stopped at Edward's side.

He bend down and kissed me urgently. "You are," he mumbled around my lips. I sighed.

Out of my eye, I saw Renesmee touch Edward's cheek, and he smiled widely at her, his white teeth shining in the light.

"They would be blood-typing in Biology, so I ditched class."

I sprang in front of Edward, my face near Renesmee. "Don't pick up that habit!" I told her warningly. She smiled at me, and I couldn't help smiling back. She touched my cheek, and I felt glad to know, that she felt a little sorry for laughing at me, and that she wanted to make up for it. She wanted me happy. I smiled wider.

Then her hand delivered impatience.

"Already when I was human, I could smell blood. I didn't like the smell." She stared at me, like that was impossible. "Well, I felt really sick. Mike helped me down. Then suddenly Edward was there. He took over Mike's job – "

"Which Mike wasn't too happy about."

"– and brought me to the school nurse." I laughed at a suddenly clear memory among all the cloudy. To set of eyes stared curious at me. "All the way, I didn't think about anything but 'please don't let me vomit on him'." Edward laughed with me, and Renesmee quickly followed.

"You never told me," he accused.

I rolled my eyes. "Of course not."

"Then why now?"

"I didn't tell you. I told Renesmee. You just happened to be here." He smiled that crooked smile. I stopped breathing – funny that I had taken this habit with me to my immortal life.

"Mike held a get-together on the La Push beach," I continued, and Renesmee stared with wide eyes. I sighed. "Yes, Jacob was there." I smiled at her. "Jacob's sisters and I had spend a lot of summers together. I knew Jacob before moving permanently to Forks. One of the boys from La Push – they were a little party joining us – mentioned that the Cullens didn't come to La Push, because Laruen had teased me with Edward." I cringed at what I was going to tell my daughter now. "So I … _Seduced_ Jacob into telling me." Renesmee stared at me, not understanding. I didn't linger. "He told me about the old legends from La Push. That the Cullens were supposed to be vampires, the so called _cold ones_."

Renesmee rested her head against my chest, wanting to hear more. "Later on, I left for Port Angeles with Angela and Jessica. They were supposed to find dressed for the spring dance.

"I wanted to find some books, since there was none in Forks. But I got lost." Both Edward and I frowned. After a second, Edward shortly shook, probably remembering something I didn't. "Four men followed me. They wanted to …" I send Edward a gaze from my eye corner. "Hurt me," I finished in one breath.

Renesmee gasped, deliberately clinging to my blouse, refusing to let go. I felt the horror shook her, and I held her closer. This story was too much for her, so I didn't tell anymore.

"Should we go home?" I asked Edward silently.

Renesmee sprang in my eyes, immediately touching me, telling me that she wanted to hear the rest. "But you're not old enough." I shook my head.

"It's not her age," Edward told me and held me closer. "She has this from her father. I don't like hearing this, either. Anything that hurt you should be erased in an instant!" Renesmee seemed to agree.

I sighed. "Fine, then. Edward came driving in his silver Volvo," I laughed, remembering how the sight of it had made me feel secure before I was even in the seat beside him. "'Get in!' he told me." I shrugged. "I obeyed."

"I was furious with the four men that had been intended on hurting her, so I drove us out of town. I tried to pull myself together."

"A few minutes later, we drove back to Port Angeles. We found Angela and Jessica, but they were on their way home. So," I grinned, "your dad asked me to dinner."

Once again, we both laughed.

"It was then he told me I was right about the mindreading. In the car, on our way back to Forks, I told him what Jacob had told me." Edward's eyes witnessed that he was no longer with us, but in the car, sitting by me, his hands knotted into fists around the wheel. "I told him I had searched on the internet on the subject, but it was all very ridiculous," I said, using the words from back then. "Then I told him it didn't matter."

Edward was with us again, grinning widely. "It sure didn't – to you. Any sane person would have stayed away. But I'm glad you didn't."

I smiled at him. "'It doesn't matter?' he half shouted. 'Not to me,' I answered. He asked me if I didn't care if he was a monster. I told him no. He told me I was insane. Then I asked if I was wrong again." Renesmee held her breath with huge eyes. "'That's not what I was referring to. 'It doesn't matter''." I laughed. I had quoted him perfectly. "'I'm right,' I gasped. 'Does it _matter_?' he asked." I laughed. Edward kissed my forehead with a smile.

"The next days I asked him all kinds of questions and he would answer most of them."

"I asked her if she would care to chance her plans the Saturday for the dance. She said no. So at Saturday, I would show her what _I_ did when it was good weather."

I smiled, remembering. "He took me to a clearing in the forest." I shrugged.

Renesmee nudged my cheek expectantly, but I could only laugh, remembering my little nudger.

"All walls were down," Edward whispered and stroke my cheek, slightly touching Renesmee's.

In only a second, I forgot that Renesmee was there. "Everything was clear," I whispered back.

He smiled. "And so the lion fell in love with the lamb …" he murmured.

I felt the same thrill as back then, the same need to look away, to hide my eyes. "What a stupid lamb," I sighed, like back then.

"What a sick, masochistic lion."

I stared into his eyes, love overwhelming me. I lifted my hand to touch his cheek. I still couldn't get used to how soft it was.

A meadow, a human girl stroking the cheek of a vampire. I was suddenly aware of Renesmee. I got a better hold on her and smiled.

We continued through the forest. Renesmee frowned after a minute. She touched my cheek, and I sighed, knowing that she had figured out that there was more.

"You can always get this story," I whispered. "Later on, when you're older. I don't agree that age isn't a big part of this. You will have easier to comprehend the story in a few years."

She shook her head, and I sighed.

It was Edward that continued the story. "The next day, I took her with me home." Renesmee stiffened once again, the image of Rosalie, Emmet and Jasper, wanting to hurt me, in her head again. "No, Renesmee, they weren't like that when we came." He hesitated and I frowned. One had been.

"In the evening, there would be a storm. I had said yes to coming with them," I whispered, eyes staring away. Probably blank with memories.

"Then they came," Edward growled. Renesmee stared at us, grasping that it was this I hadn't wanted her to hear. Still didn't want her to hear. She was so smart. So her father.

"James, Laurent and Victoria," I whispered.

"They were nomads," Edward told our daughter. "They were coming toward us, hearing the game, too quick for us to hide Bella. We tried to make her look as a vampire as good as we could. But James smelled her."

Renesmee gasped and hid in my hair. I stroked her bag.

"He was a hunter, and he decided to hunt her," he continued, trying to ignore us, to make it easier, I guess. "After we had counseled with Alice and Emmet – "

"You mean reasoning with you," I teased, and he half grinned, half grimaced at me.

"Right. Well, Bella were to tell Charlie she didn't want to live in Forks anymore, that she was going home. We figured James would see that Bella would be with me, and therefore, we had to separate. So Bella left for Phoenix with Alice and Jasper while Emmet, Carlisle, Rosalie, Esme and I tried to confuse the others, to take them down."

"I called home to make sure my mom could check the answering machine to hear, that she were to stay away from Phoenix. Then we got a call from my mom, and I talked with her. Only it wasn't my mom – James had captured her, and to save her life, I had to come home to her house." Renesmee suddenly started shaking as she realized what I was telling her. She touched my cheek, as if she was trying to tell the me from the past to not go.

"I triggered Jasper and Alice and got home, where I was told to go to the dance studio. Here, James was waiting for me." I gasped as Renesmee started crying in wild sobs, holding me tighter than before. "Shh, shh, it's okay," I whispered. Edward was there, soothing her, too, humming her lullaby.

She slowly stopped shaking, though it didn't stop entirely. Now I was sure. I wouldn't tell her anymore.

But, apparently, Edward would.

"James taped everything," Edward continued, ignoring my hiss, begging him to not go further. "It had been a trick. He'd used tapes to fake the phone conversation with Bella – tapes where Renée's voice was in, every word from the conversation mentioned."

I decided I might as well tell the next. "I tried to run, but he caught me and swung me into the wall of glass. He broke my leg and – "I stopped. A sound I had never heard before had caught my attention. A low growl. Furious.

Renesmee were snarling.

I kissed her forehead again.

"He bit her, but we got there soon enough. I sucked the venom out of her."

We both cringed at the memory.

"That's it, I guess." She immediately recognized the lie and touched my cheek, but this time, nor Edward nor I would continue.

She sighed. "We'll tell you some day," I promised her, not sure if I could keep it. She was going to hold me to it.

"Let's get back," Edward suggested, and we turned around.


	2. Chapter 2

Next chapter ^^

Rematch

Not far from the house, Edward started grumbling. I looked curiously at him. Renesmee's eyes were big.

Finally, I could see that in front of the house, Jacob and Emmet were waiting. Jacob ran toward us. He understood that Renesmee, Edward and I needed to be alone sometimes, but he still didn't like it. He stopped a few steps from us. Renesmee reached out toward him, and I willingly held her out for Jacob. Jacob listened as she touched his cheek. He grinned at me. "You seduced me?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes. "You know it's true."

"I do. I just never thought you'd confess it," he answered with a shrug. I curled Renesmee into my chest again. On Edward's expression, I knew this was the only thing she had told him. She understood that what we had told her was only for her.

We turned toward Emmet.

He grinned at me, and I frowned. What now?

A few seconds passed, and then we were in front of him, a few steps away. I heard the others in the front room. I raised an eyebrow.

"What's wrong, Emmet? Punched a werewolf?" Though Jacob and the other werewolves were shape-shifters, we still just called them werewolves. It was easier.

Emmet's grin grew wider. "That wouldn't even manage," he answered, shaking with laughter, now. Then it ripped through his lips, and he laid back his head and laughed like a bear.

"Seriously, Emmet, I'm going to punch your face and brain into one if you don't explain!" I growled.

He looked at me again. "You really can't figure it out on your own?" he asked, disappointed. "Well, then let me quote – you. Me. Arm-wrestling. Dining room table. Now." I stared at him, and he filled in a low: "Unless you're too afraid …?"

It had been a while since he'd challenged me. After a while, he grew annoyed with loosing. So this caught me off guard. He had surely been waiting for the newborn powers to disappear.

I frowned. "I'll beat you. Just like all the other times." It was more to assure myself that I said it.

"Sure, sure," Emmet agreed, grinning hugely, not at all agreeing.

I handed Renesmee for Edward as the others came out. I could see that Edward seriously needed a reason to not lose control. Besides, losing control would make Emmet way too happy.

"Do I have to remind you that Esme is quite fond of that table?" Alice asked, dancing toward us.

I Scowled at her. "No," both Emmet and I answered in the same time. The we both walked – actually, I had the feeling I was more dancing – over to the place where I'd destroyed the old rock for exactly this, but now there was a new one.

I gritted my teeth and made myself ready.

"If I win, I'm allowed every bit of right to make fun of your sex life once again," he grinned. I frowned. No way was I going to live with that.

"No," I answered.

"Scared?"

I didn't do anything but scowl at him. He just grinned, and somewhere behind me, Rosalie laughed. Jasper snickered. I had no choice. I agreed.

"Fine. But if I win, the old treaty is intact, _and_ you'll bow down and call me your superior."

He cringed. "Good one."

"I know."

We took each other's hands – and then it began.

It wavered back and forth between us. It was really hard to keep him from winning. I had the feeling he was playing with me, _letting_ me push our hands down his side, then making them closer to mine, before letting me push him away again.

Suddenly, he smashed my hand down into the rock, leaving a mark. Edward growled. It only hurt a little.

Emmet got to his feet, dancing around. Then he turned toward me, smiling. "So, Bella," he continued, and I knew what was coming. "House still standing? Or haven't you had time to smash it down lately?"

I just glared at him. Then I got up, too, stepped over to his side and then calculatingly smashed my fit into his chest. He was pushed many feet back. He silenced and stared at me.

I grinned at him. Then a snarl came from behind. Rosalie, no doubt. Except for her, everyone was silence.

"Care for a rematch?" I asked lightly. Edward hissed.

"Nice," Jasper muttered.

"Shut up," Alice warned.

"Fine by me, little sister. I just hope you're fine with your daughter watching while I kick your face to unrecognizable," Emmet smiled, almost looking like an angel. A really annoying angel.

"Actually, I'm not fine with her watching while I make you into tofu."

I crouched down into my hunting crouch. No need to agree on the terms. If he won, I should call him superior – If I won, he would leave me the hell alone.

As he launched for me, I stepped to the side, hitting for his thick head, hoping to smash it in.

He caught my hand and swung me against the rock we'd been sitting at moments ago – only I let only my feet touch it, using the rock to cast myself toward him, leaving only dust behind me.

I smashed into him before he could avoid, and we hit the ground. He bit for my shoulder, the closest part of me to his teeth, but I flinched back in time. No way I was going to have scars like Jasper.

We got up and faced each other. A playful snarl ripped my throat, a sound much like it coming from his.

I was just about to attack again, when Renesmee cried out her agony. Both Emmet and I grew to a stop in the exact same time.

"Maybe doing it in front of Renesmee isn't such a good idea," Rosalie suggested, but then she saw Edward – his jaw was clenched, eyes on Emmet, waiting for a mistake to justify him ripping his throat apart. "Or in front of Edward."

Emmet grinned. "Fine," he said, muffling my hair. "We'll do it again, little sister," he promised, ignoring Edward's sudden snarl.

"Agreed," I said with a grim smile.

Renesmee reached out for me, but before I had her securely in my arms, I was in Edward's. His eyes were, wary, on Emmet who grinned back.

Renesmee touched my cheek, showing me everything. I smiled at her anguish as I left the rock as dust and launched myself at Emmet. I felt real horror in her, as Emmet tried to bite me.

"She's not the only one feeling that way," Edward murmured.

"Bella, you _have_ to do that again!" Jasper laughed, suddenly at our side. Edward grumbled, not at all agreeing.

"Sure thing, Jasper," I told him.

"Be sure to kick his ass, please. That would be so satisfying," he grinned.

I grinned back. "Agreed," I repeated.

"Bella!" Emmet called, and I turned around – this was almost impossible, though, with an unwilling Edward holding me.

"Yes, Emmet?" I asked.

"When you and Edward go home tonight, why don't you leave Renesmee here?"

I frowned, knowing one of his jokes was coming. Still, I said: "Why?"

He grinned triumphantly, and I instantly regretted not just calling his bluff. "Because Edward looks like you're finally going to destroy that cottage of yours."

Edward grumbled and held me closer – only this made Emmet's joke so much funnier.

We walked back to the house where Emmet sat down to watch a game. He seemed very satisfied. So did Rosalie and she sat down beside him with a huge smile.

"You know, Emmet, maybe we're not the only ones who'll be destroying something tonight," I said.

Jasper laughed, Alice smiled, Rosalie stared – Emmet totally ignored me.

Edward, seeming more in control, brushed my hair as I gritted my teeth. "Don't think about him, love," he whispered.

"How can I not think about someone who's clearly in no possession of enough brain cells' to comprehend an insult?"

Emmet finally turned. "Oh, Bella, I'm not insulted. I'm very happy that you think I'm going to destroy something, too." He turned back to the TV, but this time he lay his arm around Rosalie, sighing.

I grumbled. "Then why don't you die with joy?" I asked. "Or do you just hate for others to be happy?"

Again – nothing.

I rolled my eyes and walked away from the sofa, sitting in a chair not far away. Then I whispered in Renesmee's ear: "Go take the remote controller and shift to whatever channel you'd better like."

She immediately stalked toward Emmet, grabbed the controller and shifted to some puppet show, clearly for children.

Emmet first looked at her too-innocent face, and then glared at me – who was hugely smiling.

"Ha, ha, very funny," he snorted. "Happy now?"

"Very."

"Bella," Alice suddenly called. I turned toward her with an asking glance at her beautiful face. "Emmet actually did destroy your cloth." I looked down. Oh, right. He did. I suddenly realized that this meant that Alice was going to make me shift, and that she was going to help me – rather do it for me – choose what to wear. I was suddenly very angry at Emmet. "You will have to get something else on. Come with me!"

She grabbed my hand, and we ran – me, not too much – toward the cottage, and my huge walk-in closet.

I watched as she worked her way through my cloth, looking for something very elegant.

"I thought cloth were supposed to mirror a person's personality," I commented as she gave me a silk shirt. She just hissed at me.

I sighed. Alice would be Alice, and I would be Bella. And, according to Alice, cloth didn't matter to me, and therefore, she could have her fun. Well, as long as I could move.

"You know, you were too inspirering before," she mumbled, and I looked at her with a not-understanding look. She sighed. "Jasper would like to challenge Emmet, too, now."

I laughed. "Doubtless."

"You know, sometimes I think you weren't born to be human, but to really just be a vampire. Maybe you weren't a danger-magnet, but a future-magnet. Maybe all those vampires came for you, because you were supposed to be vampire and not human."

I stared at her. In a strange way, her words made sense. I sighed. "I'm glad I'm adjusting," I whispered.

She grinned at me. "Of course you are."

"Alice, I still can't get over when you left," I sighed. "It didn't feel right."

She nodded. "I know what you mean," she agreed. "But although it doesn't _feel_ that way, it was right."

"I know. I'm grateful for what you did – for me, for Renesmee." After a second, I added: "You know, I have to take over the family business with J. Jenks."

She stared at me. "Why?"

"Because Jasper's scaring him to death, that's why," I answered.

She grinned at me. "He liked you," she stated.

I grinned back. "Very much."

She finally found a pair of pants that she found good enough for me. I quickly put them on, and then sighed.

"What's wrong?" she asked, knowing that it wasn't a respond to her choice of clothes. If the choice was on my shoulders, there wouldn't have been put much thought into the decision.

"I just thought if I'm ever going to have even the slightest chance of beating Emmet." I looked hopefully at her. "Can you see that?"

She smiled widely at me. "Nope. I can't tell what you'll become in the future. But if you want my advice, and to not get any more humiliated, don't challenge him for a while, please."

I muffled a hiss. "You're only saying that so that I won't give Jasper any good ideas." I thought about it. "If we both tried to take him down …" I grinned. It surprised me that my new nature made me so wild. But there really was nothing to do except for learning to live with it. And that was what I was doing.

She cringed. "Please, Bella, be _reasonable_! Besides, Rosalie would get involved, you know that."

I nodded with an apologetic smile.

Then we ran back to the house. I tried to outrun her, but it was difficult, especially now that my newborn powers were gone. In the last months they had slowly disappeared. Emmet had, without doubt, been holding an eye on me.

When we came back, Renesmee sat besides Edward at the piano. She turned her head to me and smiled dazzlingly. I something near danced to her side, pulling her into my arms before sitting beside Edward. His fingers started playing my lullaby, and I hummed with him. There were no words for what that melody meant to me.

A rhythmic sound from upstairs, and I realized that Alice had left the room. I looked cautiously at the stairs as she approached. She smiled at me, completely innocent. This made me think not.

"Why are you looking like that?" I asked her. "All smug."

She smiled winningly at me. "I'm not smug."

"Go tell that to someone else – but before, tell my why you're so utterly happy."

She rolled her eyes and reached out for Renesmee. My eyes narrowed. "Oh, _please_, Bella!"

"What are you planning?"

Alice let her arms fall to her sides. "I thought Renesmee might like to go for a drive," she answered, again that too innocent smile.

"Excuse me?" I asked. "What?"

"You know, maybe she'd like to go see Seattle? Something outside the house and the forest?"

My eyes narrowed even more, but not entirely because of her words. Because of Seattle. I still didn't like it, though Victoria's newborns were no more there. Still, the thought of Renesmee there …

I shuddered.

"Please, Bella."

I looked dubiously at her. Then I decided: "No dice."

"What?"

"I know you're up to something."

"Bella," she sighed and slid down beside me on her knees. "Do you love me?"

"_Ugh_, Alice! I'm not gonna fall for that!"

She hissed miserably and walked away, a deep grumble in her throat. She stopped at Rosalie's side, sending her a meaningful glance. I held Renesmee closer to me. Apparently, it was not only Alice that were in this. What about Jasper? Emmet? Esme? Even Carlisle?

Edward?

I immediately turned around, eyes still narrowed. He smiled soothingly at me. This only made me more confused.

"Seriously!" I hissed.

Jasper snickered, sensing my confusion and anger. "Easy, Bella," he cautioned with a crooked smile. There was something wary about it. He still didn't trust the newborn in me too much, though he'd been coming around.

"What's going on?" I asked him, my eyes boring into his.

"Bella, can't you just let your daughter come out for a few hours?" Alice begged.

"Not when you're like that." Then I thought about it. Maybe Renesmee _did_ need to get out. I sighed. "Can I come?" I surrendered.

"No!" she said immediately.

I groaned.

"I could go," Jacob suggested. He half grinned at me when my eyes looked suspiciously at him and then shrugged.

Edward stopped playing and laid his hand against my neck. He knew what they were thinking, what they were planning for our daughter. If he didn't stop it, there must be nothing wrong with it.

Doubt wavered around me. I didn't know if I could trust Edward on this. What would Alice do in Seattle? I didn't like this. It wouldn't be the first, or the last, time Alice outrageously surprised me. And I knew from experience that I probably wouldn't like her surprise. I slid my hand down Renesmee's spine and held her securely and then got up. I hesitated a few eight-parts of a second, and then danced across the room toward Alice. The little vampire smiled exasperatingly and held out her arms for my daughter. I pulled back my hand till I held Renesmee in the armholes, waiting for Alice to take over around her waist. Unwillingly, I let go.

As Alice nearly ran to the door, her gazelle-like running sure to win every boy's heart over, Rosalie got up. I turned toward Jacob. "You," I commanded, pointing at him. "Tell me everything that happens when you get back!"

He ducked his head. "One lifetime of servitude," he mumbled teasingly as he passed me. I grinned bitterly.

Then they were gone.


	3. Chapter 3

Surprise

I wandered back and forth for an hour or two before Emmet irritated groaned at me. "Bella, you're making me restless," he accused.

Wanting to annoy him more, I passed the sofa to do my route in front of the TV, where a game was on. He rolled his eyes. "Sure, she can't make due if others aren't miserable, too."

"I'm not miserable," I groaned at him and then added lowly: "I'm just nervous."

Behind me, I heard Edward's footsteps, then the sound of my soothing lullaby. The melody made me relax, and I instantly slid down into the sofa beside Emmet. Not that I needed to sit down. I was just as comfortable standing.

"Aah," Emmet sighed, happy now. I send him a sour glance.

Another hour passed. The game ended. I was bored _and_ nervous. I lifted my hand to my temples, forcing the shield down.

_When are they coming _back_?_

I heard Edward's low laugh behind me, but no answer. I sighed and let the shield slide back into place.

"Emmet," I muttered, trying to humor myself.

"Hmm?" he asked.

"Aren't there any irritated grizzly bears out there? Or is it out of time?"

Jasper snickered behind me while Emmet burst into a loud laugh. "Sorry, Bella, but no," he answered, seeming quite sorry for himself, too.

"Oh," I muttered, in a dark mood again. What was I going to do with my spare time? Count sheeps? I really had to put some thought into that, or else all the times I'd avoided death would be spilled. Boredom would do it.

I listened to Edward's playing, wondering if I should go hunting. There would probably go a while before they'd be back, and I was a little hungry …

I suddenly thought of something completely different. My mirror image. I remembered my eyes. I smiled. They were almost like the others now. Almost golden. Then I sighed. I hadn't imagined it could be so long before my eyes would adjust. Edward had a theory. He thought that because I'd been drinking blood already before I'd changed, maybe that had done to the color. Ugh. Would I always be the freak around here?

I felt a soothing quilt covering my feelings and knew that Jasper had felt my annoyance. I turned around and flashed for him a grateful smile.

Then I decided to break the boredom. Emmet had found another game on the TV – did it never _end_? – and Jasper were reading. Esme and Carlisle had left the room, Carlisle probably in his office.

The only one without anything to do was me.

"Emmet," I said again.

"Little sister," he answered, grinning down at me.

"Fought anything interesting lately?" I asked and raised one eyebrow.

He seemed to think about it. "Well, there was this grizzly bear in the fall, but it wasn't too interesting."

I sighed in relief. "Please tell."

He smiled. "Well, I was with Rosalie, actually," he told me. "It's not that long ago. You weren't here, though. It was in the middle of the night. Wonder what you were doing …" he added as if he hadn't already figured.

The music stopped for half a second, a low hiss, and then it caught up again.

"Well, I found the scent of bear. Rosalie didn't feel like getting her cloth turned into something unrecognizable, and definitely not her hair, so she ran off."

Before he could go on, I cut in: "When you say you found the scent of bear, don't you mean _a_ bear?" I asked dazed.

He smiled. "No."

My lullaby ended, but Edward didn't stop. He continued into a new melody, which I recognized as Esme's favorite. I listened to the music for five seconds, letting the music flow through me and calming me. I felt like sleeping, but I knew that was not an option. So I turned back to Emmet, who was watching me curiously. I also saw that he was eager to tell his story, just as eager as I was for distraction.

"The story too scary for yea, little sister?" he asked teasingly.

I exhale. I must not let him get to me like that.

I ignored his attempt to make me embarrassed; he knew that his current comment would have made me blush in the past. "Okay. So there was more than one grizzly. I'm surprised Rosalie didn't come running to babysit you," I said, remembering how she'd been on to make a snap for me earlier, just for playing around …

Okay, maybe I hadn't been _just_ playing around.

"Actually, I would have been quite annoyed at her. Just found the first fun for months, and then she comes running to cut it off, sure." He grinned at me. "Like I would ever let her do that."

I rolled my eyes and waited for him to continue.

"It was a mother bear with two half-adult bears. As soon as she even caught the scent of danger, she started growling, and I knew I had found something special here. Not quite a challenge, but it wouldn't be as easy as other times."

I shook my head. "Y'know, Emmet, sometimes, you don't even have to try to make me embarrassed. Being yourself is enough to make anyone feel like blushing for being your sister."

He grinned widely, seeming smug, as if I had just said to him the biggest compliment in the world.

"So I suppose you snapped right for the young ones, just to make her angry, or what?" I asked. That seemed very possible.

"Something like that," he agreed.

In that moment, I couldn't help smiling. If I looked passed all the teasing, Emmet was one of the easiest persons, I had ever met, to talk to, to see through. And he didn't mind. He was so open … So big … So sometimes possibly very irresistible to punch in the face to make him shut up about things that he should _not_ be talking about …

"What did she do?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Attacked, of course. I wouldn't expect you to ask such a question," he added, shaking his head in teasing disapproval. "With you being a mother and all that."

I could see his point. I was very much capable of setting myself in the place of that mother bear, to feel the agony to protect her children from the enemy.

I suddenly slapped his cheek with my hand.

The music stopped and I heard Jasper getting to his feet, feeling the light breeze when he stood up.

"Hey!" Emmet groaned. "What was that for?"

My face was restrained, cool. "That was for putting that poor mother bear in such a loathsome situation," I answered.

Two seconds – then his lips boomed out his amusement. "Bella, seriously, not even _human_ vegetarians feel sorrow at eating their dinner." He shook his head. "Of course, you are a freak …"

For the second time, his head was slapped, but this time by Edward.

Emmet jumped up, a joyful, but serous, look in his eyes.

"Why don't you try once more?" Emmet asked, posing in his hunting crouch.

"Why don't you try to insult her again?" he asked, his wide grin not at all matching his words and the way his body bend forward, ready to –

I knew Esme was at the top of the stairs, just about to speak her opinion on what they were doing, but I cut her off before she even started.

"_Please_ put that off for just a few minutes, and _then_ you can try to behead each other."

They stared at me.

"I want to hear the story!" I continued, more sincere. Emmet didn't look as if he was about to get back into his place on the sofa anytime soon, but Edward looked a bit cautious. If I really pleaded, he would do as I asked.

But I would literally have to get down on my knees …

"_Please_," I breathed again, looking into Edward's eyes, not considering letting down my shield. I wouldn't be capable of that now. I could only do that when my mind wasn't filled with other things, which it certainly was now.

"Bella, this is so _off_! You started it!" Emmet groaned.

"Na-ha!" I argued childishly. I didn't feel embarrassed, though. Sometimes, being a Cullen, being childish was very, very naturally …

So his answer really shouldn't surprise me, especially not when it was Emmet.

"Ya-ha!"

I stared at him for a few seconds, then crossing my arms. "Na-ha!" I repeated.

"Ya-ha!"

"Na-"

"Stop that!" Jasper commanded. Both Emmet and I turned to stare at him.

"What?" we both asked at the same time, then cringed.

"Seriously, this is so …" He seemed to be looking for the right word. "Weird."

I suddenly realized the truth in his words. Truly, this was weird. Me, siding with Emmet's _dinner_! He might as well side with one of my mountain-lions!

Still, I would never attack a mother, I knew that much. But I couldn't ever justify that.

"Well, everything about Bella is weird," Emmet promised, rolling his eyes, going on before Edward could even consider cutting him off. "I mean, how could we not expect this? Bella feel sympathy for the grizzly, sure, but Emmet, being attacked, no way …"

I scowled at him. "I didn't realize you needed me to be nervous on your part, you being the one provoking the bear and all that," I growled.

Suddenly, Esme was there, in the middle of everything, and it all seemed very insignificant now. Esme was such a calm creature, with such an authority …

"Please, don't fight," she whispered.

She was better at this than I was – probably all the years practice. Or not. Maybe I was just so funny in my unsuccessful attempt to stop them, that I would never learn it. That seemed very plausible.

Emmet sat back in the couch, all relaxed now. Edward returned to the piano, Jasper to his book.

I hoped Emmet would go on with his story where he'd stopped …

"What happened after you killed the mother?" I asked, made a face, and then let it go. I sat down, trying to be casual about it. I asked for the story, I reminded myself.

He half-smiled at me. I knew what would come. He would kill the babies. The picture in my head changed into something even more loathsome – instead of bears, now it was Renesmee and I before the big vampire. And I would not be strong enough …

I shook it off me, my body not showing my thoughts – I hoped.

"You know, you'll dance around in a moment," he grinned. I very much doubted that. I frowned.

"Please explain."

"I let the babies go after dealing with the mother. I thought that, since the mother had been one of the best challenges for a long time because of her urge to protect her children, I might let the babies go. Maybe they could grow into good challenges, too."

I stared at him. Didn't he know me at all? If he hadn't added the thing with them growing up into good challenges, yes, I probably would have danced. But he was actually planning to go find them and …

I was frozen. Perfect stone. Diamond. My eyes didn't leave him. Slowly, as he took in my expression, the smile fainted into a frown.

"Edward, I think she really lost her mind this time," he called.

Edward was already on his way. I was in his arms at once, and I felt myself unfreeze there, in his warmth …

My breathing was uneven. The babies …

But I couldn't, wouldn't, let myself think of that. I got a hold of myself and got up. Edward watched me warily as I walked outside. In the light breeze the pictures must be washed away, I was sure of that.

As I stood there, I thought about the picture. I had to edit the story of it, I realized, and frowned. Renesmee weren't half-adult. Yet. She would be. Soon. How old would she appear in just a year? Eight? Nine? I didn't like to think of hit. She grew too fast. I could see it, every time I had been away from her for an amount of time – she had grown. I didn't have enough _time_.

I suddenly knew it hadn't been Alice's being weird and all that that had made me not want to give Renesmee away. I didn't like to know that I would lose time with my precious little girl.

Where could they be? Why was Alice so full of secrets? Why were they all in on it. If I really used all my attention on pleading with Edward, surely, he would give me what I wanted. But he would try to resist for as long as he could hold, and they might come back while I pleaded, and then the time would be lost anyway.

I didn't think Jacob was with them, though, and that made me happy. Though he was not completely one of us, he was probably the closest anyone ever got to being a vampire without actually being bitten and all that.

I sighed. Why mustn't I know this? It was so frustrating, so none-fair. Before I really knew, I was planning revenge. Yes, revenge _was_ somewhat an extra sent to all our abilities. Emmet had wanted revenge over me, I had wanted revenge for his revenge, and now I was also planning my revenge for something I didn't know anything about. I didn't even know if it _should_ be avenged.

I sighed and but my arm over my face, trying to cut my mind off all that, listening to the wind, the sound of the earth beneath me, the game inside, Jasper turning the page – Edward's steps right behind me.

I turned and he smiled cautiously at me. I was half way on smiling, but I froze. Why was he cautious?

"What's wrong?" I whispered. Was something wrong? Was something wrong with _Renesmee_?

He seemed to note the fear in my voice. He shook his head, as to clarify that Renesmee were in no danger.

I sighed.

He reached out for me, and despite my irritating curiosity, I let him wrap his arms around me. Okay, _let_ him was not the right word. I somewhat forced him, clinging to his chest.

For some strange reason, I wanted to cry.

It took me a minute to understand just a little amount of the _why_ this was.

Because of my remorse over Renesmee, over her too quickly aging, I also felt as if he was slipping for me as she was.

How funny. This morning I had been perfectly happy. Now I didn't want to ever leave his protective arms – not much different from every other time he held me, only this time it was because it felt as if as long as I was in his arms, nothing bad could touch me.

"What's wrong?" he whispered, repeating my words, in my ear, his voice burning. He wanted to repair whatever that was broken in me.

Only I didn't even know what was broken myself.

So I just shook my head.

"What's going on?" I mumbled against his chest.

"Don't worry," he said. "There really is nothing to worry about."

I wanted badly to believe him. Especially because I couldn't see any reason _not_ to believe him. But this maddening fear for the future …

A short, harsh laugh escaped my lips, as I encountered the thought of me always being afraid of the future, and he looked curiously down at me.

Though I didn't want to, and his frown clarified that he didn't want me to, either, I wormed myself free of his arms. I had to face it. I couldn't hide forever.

Then I heard the roar of Alice's porch, and I sighed. I felt a little happiness. I would soon know what their secret had been about.

The yellow porch drove to a stop in front of us, and before I knew of it, Jasper, Emmet, Carlisle and Esme was with us.

Alice danced out of the car. Behind her, Jacob came, his face unfathomable. What was going _on_? Now Jacob knew, too.

I was a mistake sending him. He was no longer my ally.

Then Rosalie came out, reaching back in for Renesmee.

But my daughter was too eager to do that. She jumped out of the car and ran toward me.

"Momma!" she half laughed, half shouted. "Momma, it's perfect!"

_What_? What was perfect? It was so frustrating. They'd taken my daughter from me, too.

I held my arms out for her, but Alice was suddenly between us. Alice grinned widely at me.

"Sorry. We're not ready yet," she said, turned around, grabbed my daughter – and disappeared into the house, Rosalie not more than a second behind her, something in her arms …

A low snarl in my throat made Edward's arms appear around me again. I didn't really need Jasper right now. Edward was enough.

Right now. But what about in a minute, when the secret would be revealed?

We walked back inside. I waited at the end of the stairs for Alice to appear with my daughter, but the time dragged on. And nothing happened.

"What's taking so long time?" I cried out, and Jacob was suddenly at my side, smiling at me.

Funny how this smile comforted me. He was the only one trustworthy now, my werewolf friend. He didn't need to say anything. I was immediately calm. Sort of.

Then I heard them approach. Rosalie and Alice first, after them the sound of the little, beloved body.

They stopped at the top of the stairs, both smiling widely at me. The lifted their arms, as if they were a manager in a circus, introducing his best performance

"May I introduce –"Alice began.

"Renesmee," Rosalie finished.

In the middle of them, Renesmee stood, but she was different. At first I didn't realize what it was that was different.

But then I saw it. The skirt, the shirt, the shoes, the bag in her hands.

Renesmee was wearing a school-uniform.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you for the reviews :)

4. Outrageous

I stared, frozen. Though it was naturally for me to be stone-still, this was different. It didn't feel as if I was capable to move.

My eyes, wide as ever, were locked on the bronze-haired girl. What was going on? Why was she wearing that outfit?

"Bella," Edward murmured. "Love?"

But I couldn't answer him.

An entire minute passed by, before Alice danced down the steps to stand in front of me.

"So?" she asked deliberately. "What do you think?"

I slid my eyes to her face, now staring at her. "What?"

Alice sighed. "Bella, seriously, what do you think? I picked it out a month ago, so it's maybe a little off, but –"

"_What_?" I shouted.

"Bella, I know you don't know, but really, cloth seasons change quickly."

"Alice! What's … Going … On!" I shouted, not really as a question. More like a demand.

Alice glanced impatiently at Edward, as if it was suddenly his fault that I was being unconditionally stupid. That made me a little angry.

Edward sighed. "Jacob, you tell her. You're the only one here who has even the slightest chance at …" He cringed.

Alice turned to Jacob. "To make her see reason," she finished, and I felt Edward stiffen behind me.

In the past, the fact that Jacob was the only one who could reason with me would have made Edward angry, jealous and very, very sad. But not anymore. So I didn't understand his expression. Whatever they were up to, was he not entirely with them? Not totally agreeing. He probably had been against the whole keeping-Bella-out-of-it thing.

I waited for Jacob's explanation.

It didn't come.

Instead, Jacob was staring down at his feet. He looked … What? Ashamed? Sheepishly? As if he had somehow betrayed me?

He probably had.

I kicked the thought out of my head. I mustn't get distracted now.

"So?" I asked impatiently. "Jacob! What's going on?" I couldn't keep my voice even. My demand was merely a growl.

He finally looked up. "Will you promise me not to bite?" he asked in a whisper. What? Did he fear me? Why should I bite him?

I stared at him in blank confusion.

He took a deep breath. "Your venom is poison to me, remember?" he asked. I nodded, still not understanding. "Do you promise not to bite?"

I was about to nod, but then I stopped myself. Maybe I wouldn't be able to keep that promise. Maybe this _was_ something to be angry about. I wouldn't break a promise. No. Better keep on the safe side.

I shook my head. "But I'll promise to try."

He frowned.

Emmet laughed. "That doesn't seem very confident! The crazy vampire, promising to _try_ not to bite. Sure!" He boomed another laugh. Couldn't he at least try to hide it with a cough? That would be much more polite.

Of course, _polite_ wasn't a word in Emmet's dictionary.

"Jacob," I pleaded. I was sure I would soon burst into flames. My mind was on fire, waiting for whatever water they had to turn it off.

Or whatever wood they had to make it more pronounced.

He took in another gasp of air. I stepped closer in that moment, and we both winced at the smell. I could feel the warmth – though I had grown quite tuned to it by now, I still noticed.

"Well …" He began, but then paused, looking with eyes full of remorse at Edward.

_What_?!

A furious snarl ripped through my throat, and I stepped closer without thinking. This made Jacob talk, though. It was almost annoying, how quick he talked.

"So, Alice drove us to this shop," he continued, then looked apologetically. "I didn't notice what it was named. Sorry." He winced back from me. "Alice bough all this stuff for Nessie, and then we drove to this bookstore for school-books, and –"

"Jacob!" I shouted, and he shut up. "I am fairly capable of pulling that together myself, thank you very much! What I am interested in is _why_! _Why did you buy it_?"

In an instant, as I stepped further across the room toward Jacob, Edward's face was in front of me.

"Bella, calm down," he said in a voice that I, knowing him, could recognize as not calm at all.

My eyebrows pulled together. I wanted to look up the stairs at Renesmee, but I stopped myself.

"Please, Edward," I whispered. "Please tell me what's going on."

Now that he was in front of me, asking for me to switch mood, I was suddenly aware of Jasper's frantic try to soften my mood. I could finally let the calm cover me.

I sighed and closed my eyes. I couldn't look, couldn't concentrate.

I took a minute to think. My new brain must be able to pull all this together. What did this mean? Well, obviously that Renesmee was old enough for school. But they couldn't possibly mean that! She was growing every second. I had noticed that when she'd gone out of the porch. How could they send her to school, knowing she would grow much quicker than humans? And the humans would surely see that there was something wrong with Renesmee – wouldn't they?

Even _if_ the humans wouldn't see this, I still would. And I couldn't bear giving up so much time with her. I couldn't gain it in the night, because I had carefully parted my days into two chapters: Sun time and nighttime. And these chapters belonged to different people: Renesmee and Edward. I couldn't take time from nighttime. No, I wouldn't be able to bear loosing so much time with Edward!

"Bella," Carlisle cut in, and I turned toward him. "Renesmee is old enough for school. Renesmee wants to learn, just like any other child. Probably more, actually." How did he know this? Had they asked her? My eyes narrowed. They'd kept me out of this far too long. Wasn't there supposed to be no secrets in this family?

"What are you saying, Carlisle? That she should be among humans all day?" I asked, trying very hard to hide my anger.

"It sounds as if you don't think she'll be capable of that," Jacob pointed out, not seeming too far from my own mood.

I send him an angry glance. "Of course she's capable. But she's not capable of stop growing," I snapped. _I wish she were_.

_Stop that_! I groaned at myself.

"Bella, Renesmee's grow is slowing. If it's too noticeable, we'll pull her out," Carlisle said, his voice compromising.

But I didn't want to compromise.

What I did want was all of them dead. At the moment. With two exceptions.

"Bella!" Alice called. "Don't you see? She has to start learning things!"

I scowled at her. "She can't be taught at home?" I asked her. That probably hurt. Alice had, without doubt, used a lot of time and thought on this outfit, and I would through all that away like garbage by keeping Renesmee in home-school.

Jasper was at Alice's side, his eyes not too light.

Edward tightened, his arms shifting from comforting to protecting. Alice rolled her eyes. I probably would have done the same if I wasn't so angry.

"Bella," Carlisle continued, and I looked at him. "It would be better if Renesmee start to learn being among humans now."

"Charlie," I reminded him.

"Humans that don't know or are suspicious toward us. Humans she doesn't know."

"No," I said harshly.

Edward turned, and, because his grip was so strong around my waist, I was pulled with him.

Renesmee was on her way down the stairs with Rosalie right behind her.

Renesmee stopped in front of us, her eyes locked in mine. But I wasn't giving in. Not even if I had to hurt her feelings by having her stay at home. I cringed. I didn't like hurting her feelings.

"Momma," she just said.

If this continued the way it was headed, I would give in. So I pulled my eyes away. "No," I repeated firmly.

"What if she wants to?" Rosalie asked angrily. "Are you going to force her?"

I stared into her golden eyes. They were cold as ice.

"Of course not," I whispered, my anger gone for a few seconds at the thought of forcing Renesmee into anything. But then I remembered that I had to. I had to keep her with me.

But Renesmee wanted to go to school. She wanted to leave me. She wanted to be with all those annoying, pink _humans_!

I quickly reminded me that I was not supposed to think like this.

My head hurt. Could she really want to leave me? This morning, she hadn't even wanted to leave my hand.

I looked down at her. If she really wished to, then I had to –

Yes, I was nicely on my way to giving up.

I didn't think it through. I just turned around and ran out the door, ripping myself free from Edward's touch.

I couldn't stay in there. I had to leave. Quickly.

The forest didn't catch more of my notice than needed to not run all the trees down. Carlisle was right. Renesmee might as well learn this right away. But the time …

Someone was suddenly at my side, and I knew whom.

I darted to a stop. I needed his arms right now.

Finally, I was where I wanted to be. I sighed against his chest, wanting very much to cry over everything.

We stood there for many minutes, till I started wondering why he hadn't asked me why I'd run. He was usually eager to know my thoughts.

But maybe he already understood. Maybe he had felt like denying everything, just like me. Maybe he had also wanted to run, and he might be grateful for me giving him the exact chance to escape.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, and continued before he could ask what I could possibly have to apology for. "I'm such a coward. I'm so _selfish_!"

"Stop, Bella," he mumbled in my ear. "Don't blame yourself for anything."

Of course he would not want me to blame myself for anything. He would want himself to take all the shame.

"But Edward! Why can't I just be happy, like Alice? Why can't I just send her off to school with a wide smile?"

"Because you're Renesmee's mother," he just answered, seeming to think that I should have figured this out earlier. I ignored that.

"That doesn't make sense, Edward," I accused.

"It makes perfectly sense! Renesmee is growing so quickly, and you don't want to miss anything."

"I thought my mind was closed area," I mumbled and looked up at him.

He half-smiled. "Well, partly because you mentioned Renesmee's growing problem back in the house," he answered, then looked over my head, back toward the house, with a thinking glance. "And then partly because I feel the same way."

I'd been right. He didn't like what they'd been doing after all, but he wanted to know what I thought about it. He wouldn't stop them from doing what they were doing if there was any possibility that I might be on their side.

Ugh. Their side. When had the family suddenly been divided?

My family. They were my family, and so, we would have to make this work. We would have to go back to the house. It would have to be Renesmee's choice.

And I would have to obey.

I pulled myself together and looked into his beautiful eyes. A light breeze was playing with his hair. For a second, I lost track of thought. I just stared at him.

"We should go back. If Renesmee want to go to school, she should," I whispered.

He nodded and grasped my hand.

He was just about to run, but he saw that I wasn't going to move. Not now.

"What?" he whispered, his face suddenly very close.

I recognized something from a time long ago, a time when I was human. Oh right, there it was – my heart wasn't beating.

I smiled shortly, and then returned to my sad expression. I didn't like to have to say what I was about to.

"Don't ever leave me, Edward."

He stared at me. "I think Emmet's right. You have lost your mind."

I grimaced. He wasn't taking me seriously.

"Edward, I know you're not intending on leaving me, but …" I hesitated. How to tell this? "I have a strange feeling that we'll soon be separated. Renesmee is always changing, and now she's finally leaving me. I'll die if you go, too."

My head was hanging, my eyes locked on the ground.

"Bella!" he said furiously. I cringed. Was he angry with me?

His arms tightened around me.

"Don't think that! Don't ever think that! I won't, nor can I, leave you! Never! And don't think that Renesmee will ever leave you, either!"

"But Edward!" I cried. There was no tears in my eyes, but I wished there had been. "She's growing so fast. It's not like any other child! I can't stand it. I'm sure she's not intending on leaving me, but … But it _feels_ that way! And I –"

He cut me off, his mouth suddenly urgently against mine. I didn't quite understand, but I responded anyway.

"What was that about?" I asked and stared into his eyes when he left my lips burning for more. Left my whole body burning for more.

He stroked my cheek. I shivered slightly.

"I love you. I can't bear to see you unhappy," he just answered.

"Always the gentleman."

His crooked smile left me thoughtless. Then I scrambled what was left of my mind together and started running. We had to get back to the others. I couldn't have Renesmee thinking I was angry with her.

Alice was waiting for us outside. She was sitting on her porch, which was still parked out front of the house, looking wary. She got up when we approached. She danced toward us.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I didn't see that you would react like this! I took it for granted that you would agree."

She sounded truly sorry, and so, I couldn't be angry with her. I had never been a grudge holder.

I embraced her and ruffled her hair. "Don't think about it, Alice. I overreacted."

We walked back into the house.

Emmet was sitting in the couch, surprise, surprise, watching a game, Jasper at his side. Carlisle and Esme stood on the top on the stairs letting up to Carlisle's office. Jacob stood beside Rosalie who held a slightly sobbing Renesmee in her arms.

I didn't stop to think, I just went over to my daughter's side.

"Renesmee," I called and held out my arms for her. Rosalie looked cautiously at me. Maybe not that. Maybe murderously. "Oh, please, Rosalie!" I growled at her.

In that moment, Renesmee turned, and I saw the most terrible thing in her eyes.

Fear.

No! I couldn't possibly have scared her! No!

"Renesmee," I whispered, feeling like crying, yet again.

She hesitated, then reached out for me. But before I could have her in my arms, Jacob was in front of me.

"What are you doing?" I asked him coolly.

"You can't handle this," he said harshly.

My jaw clenched. What I couldn't handle was him being a jerk.

"Get out of the way," Edward said, his voice without any shape of feeling. It was a warning.

"No dice. Get her under control, then I can consider –"

"You can consider _nothing_, Jacob Black!" I grumbled. I was furiously, just like the time I found out he imprinted on my daughter. It was time to make up for the mistake of not punching him into a broken carcass.

"Jacob," Alice said, cutting Jacob off before he could say anything else. "It's only going to be bad if you insist on behaving like this."

Jacob stared at her – then moved out of the way.

I felt relief that my hands would stay clear of human blood. For now.

Rosalie handed me Renesmee. Renesmee looked up into my eyes, and every anger in my body disappeared in the chocolate brown color.

I touched her face lightly with my finger. "I'm sorry," I whispered.

All traces of fear vanished. She reached for my cheek.

I was leaving the room, so quickly she didn't first recognize that I was gone. Then Edward was gone, too. She felt lost, weak, and wrong. I heard the thought of me regretting having her. She thought I was angry with her.

I shook her hand off. I weren't going to let these lies live.

"Don't believe any of that," I whispered, forcing myself to smile at her.

She smiled back, her eyes two stars in the night. She was my star, my twinkling light, right beside my moon, my Edward.

"If you really want to go to school, then that can be arranged, of course." I send Alice a side-glance. "We wouldn't want Alice to be all panicky about not getting to show off your new clothes."

She smiled widely at me. I already knew her answer. Yes. She wanted to go.

I wanted to kick myself for once again feeling alone.

"Bella," Alice murmured at my side. "There is things to be considered here."

I sighed. "Like what, Alice?" I asked.

"We'll have to move," she answered obviously.

I turned to stare at her. Move? As in … Leave?

"What?"

Edward caught a part of my hair, pulling it to place behind my ear. It calmed me a bit, the sensation of his touch.

"Bella, almost everybody around here knows each other," she said. "If Renesmee _Cullen_ shows up in school, everybody will wonder, gossip will flow."

"Gossip always flow about the Cullens," I said harshly. I didn't want to leave. Forks was my home.

"True, but this will be worse," Jasper cut in, sensing my mood, feeling me getting all defensive again.

It was starting to become a habit. I had to get myself under control.

I took a deep breath to steady myself.

"Bella, we'd had to leave soon anyway," Alice assured me, rubbing my arm comfortingly.

Yes. We would've. But soon wasn't now.

Renesmee tugged herself closer, calming me more. I just had to do it. Renesmee was more important than my own selfishness.

"Fine," I whispered.

How would I be able to leave this house? It felt like home to me. Not, it didn't _feel_ like. It _was_ home.

Renesmee suddenly yawned. It was starting to get dark. My star needed to sleep.

"I'll get her," Alice suggested, her arms open for me to give her Renesmee. She'd obviously seen me asking for her to do it.

When she out toward the river, I left out the front door. Nighttime would soon begin, but I, for once, couldn't concentrate on that. I had to be away. I had to … What did I have to? I didn't know. I would find out.

I was moving slowly away, to the west. I felt strange. Weird. For a short moment, I agreed with everyone else. I _must_ have lost my mind.

Edward was behind me, following, but he didn't catch up with me. I was sure he knew I needed to be alone for a few minutes.

Before I knew where I was going, I was at a stop in a very special and beloved place.

I was in our meadow.


	5. Chapter 5

So here's the next chapter :) Thank you for your reviews. Please enjoy.

5. Goodbyes

I walked slowly into the middle of the clearing, smelling all the flavors here. I remembered the first time I came here. Though it felt like looking through water, I remembered, and the memory slowly turned clearer.

I looked up into the night. It was a full moon.

"Are you all right?" he asked. He had walked to stand behind me. He didn't touch me.

"I don't know," I answered. "I don't know anything right now."

"I'll help you remember one thing," he said. Slowly, he put his lips to my throat. I gasped. It was as if his touch send lightning through my body. And this static feeling wanted me to turn around and embrace him.

But instead, I took one step forward. His lips disappeared.

I knew he'd frozen behind me, wondering if he'd offended me. Silly Edward.

We stood in the silence. I couldn't turn around to face him. I couldn't be the one breaking the ice.

When did things become so _difficult_?

"What's wrong, Bella?" he asked me. He didn't move and neither would I. Would we be frozen in these positions forever?

I shook my head. "As I said, I don't know," I answered in a low voice.

"You're worried," he stated. "Don't be!"

Always so quick to assure me to not worry. Always wanting me to be happy, always wanting so much to bear it all himself.

But would he be strong enough to bear my fears? I didn't think so. And I wasn't strong enough to let him. Especially not if he would fall.

"Of course I'm worried," I mumbled. "Every time I have is precious, every time that passes brings another second to Renesmee's too-quick life! And then I just waste it, running away."

"Remember Nahuel, Bella. He'll get the chance of being just as old as any vampire," he reminded me.

"Exactly Edward. Remember Nahuel? The guy who grew up in _seven years_!"

He didn't answer, realizing my problem.

"Bella," he sighed. "Don't worry. There truly is nothing to worry about."

I turned to look at him, and he rolled his eyes. My eyes narrowed.

"Really?" I asked, crossing my arms. He seemed to notice the teasing in my voice.

"Trust me."

"Hmm. I'll need some thinking on that one," I stated, moving closer.

"You have all the time you want."

I thought for a minute, teasing him with the time, dragging it out.

I didn't think of not worrying or trusting him. I suddenly did both of those things.

No, I was thinking of a time long ago in this very meadow, right after I'd made a very hard, at that time, and very right decision. He'd said he wanted to give me everything I wanted, and among these things, there were one thing that _I_ had then shoved off to our honeymoon.

It had been close, but, clearly, not close enough.

And since there wasn't anything to worry about at the time, why not linger in the memories?

"Time's up!" I declared, throwing myself at him, picking up where we'd once left off.

The sun would be up in a few minutes, and we would have to go get Renesmee in about an hour or so.

I sighed, quickly putting on my clothes again.

"Hey," Edward complained, and I smiled at him, kissing the tip of his nose.

"Renesmee," I reminded him.

"There is still an hour," he pointed out, caught my arms and pulled me to the ground.

I rolled my eyes and answered his lips.

So the sun was up when we finally made us self leave. I didn't feel like leaving our meadow, but we had to.

We raced back to the house. I was in an awfully good mood, trying very hard to beat him. He'd always been quicker than me. He always would be.

I would have to beat Emmet to find my pride again.

When we got to the house, it was very loud inside, and we hurried in.

Emmet was, I sighed, as always sitting in the couch, watching some stupid game. He apparently didn't like the way it was turning out, 'cause he was growling very loudly.

"Easy," I said. "Life isn't a bed of roses, you know."

He turned around, looked at our clothes, which was the same as when we'd left, and jumping to the right conclusion.

"Well, yours obviously is."

I rolled my eyes. He would never stop. Even if I _did_ win a match against him, I could never make him agree to stop teasing me. Only with the sex jokes, and even those he wasn't rather happy to put into the trust of a game.

Edward left my side, to my huge sorrow, and sat down at the piano.

"Bella!" Alice called. "Renesmee will wake up in twenty minutes."

She was standing at the top of the stairs, almost flying toward me.

I went for the door, and she followed me. Out of my eye, I spied Edward's jaw clench together. Hmm. Wonder what that meant.

"Bella, can I come with you?"

"Sure," I said, my tone not at all matching the word.

When we were securely away from the house for us to talk with no one hearing, she said: "Bella, when we leave, you and Edward will, unfortunately, have to leave your own house, too."

I grimaced. I liked our home. But I would manage.

We ran a few seconds in silence.

"You know what that means, don't you?" she asked.

"What?" I asked stupidly.

She sighed. "On the behalf of every member of the family, I'd ask you to be a little …" She choked down a laugh. "Well, if you'd be a little sensitive to our ears, so to say."

Aah. When we moved, nighttime would be a problem.

My eyes narrowed, and she suddenly laughed loudly, her voice ringing off the trees.

Before our conversation could continue, Jacob, in his wolf form, was in front of us. He'd probably been running around the cottage.

"Hi, Jacob," I greeted him. He grinned his wolf grin.

I went inside with Alice. Renesmee was still at sleep, but I tugged her into my arms anyway.

"Please, Bella."

I turned around to look at Alice's pleading look.

I smiled. "And let Emmet's chance to tease me pass him?"

She smiled, knowing it was a yes. "I'm so relieved," she said. "It's still bad with Emmet and Rosalie. You have no idea how it _has_ been."

I thought about that for a minute. "I think I can imagine," I mumbled. She laughed, and we started back to the house.

When we got back inside, Rosalie was looking score full at Alice. Alice nodded smilingly at her, and Rose eased up.

Emmet grinned at Edward. "Why so sad, bro?" he asked.

I stuck my tongue out at him and went to sit at Edward's side. As I looked at his hands on the piano, I reminded myself that I needed a hoppy.

His hands suddenly twisted in a new way, a way I hadn't seen before. New keys were played. I looked curiously at him, but he looked very into his work. Alice went to his side, seeming reluctant to help him.

I got up. I needed to solve my problem.

And since Edward was preoccupied right now, I had to turn to someone else.

"Esme," I called.

The little body of the woman that was my second mother came down the stairs. She looked at me with a warm and asking smile.

"Yes, dear?" she asked.

I held out Renesmee. "Can you please take care of her for a moment? Tell her I'll be right back when she wakes up."

Esme nodded and pulled Renesmee into her arms with a smile.

I hesitated, then turned to raise my hand and wink Rosalie with me.

Rosalie stared at me for two seconds, and then she followed me outside to the river.

"What's wrong?" she asked when we were standing at the edge of the river.

I sighed. "I'm in quite a dilemma," I told her, smiling weakly at her.

"Why?" she asked. "Because we're leaving Forks?"

I shook my head. "No. Because yesterday, when you were gone and had taken Renesmee with you, I had to ask Emmet to keep me from dying in boredom. He told some story about a bear …" I trailed off, remembering the bear mother, remembering that I had seriously temper-issues.

"So?" Rose asked.

I turned toward her. "You like tuning cars," I stated. She nodded. Then her pretty face frowned. She still didn't understand. "How did you find out you liked to do that?"

Rosalie stared at me. "I don't follow you," she declared impatiently. Ironic how vampires were some of the most impatient creatures on the earth.

"Well, Rose, I need a hoppy. And I have no idea what to do about it."

She was silence for a few seconds. Then she lay her head back and laughed.

I glared at her. Of course she had to be happy on my behalf.

"Rose, please help me out here," I said, but she kept laughing. I saw another way to make her stop. "If you don't help me, my new hoppy will have to be to keep challenging Emmet till I win."

She stopped. She could see that I was determined to reach my gold, and she didn't want to hear Emmet complain about me beating him up good. I was sure of that.

Thinking of beating Emmet up good almost made me decide my new hoppy, but I had to keep my thoughts under control.

"Fine. Well, I guess you'll just have to try a lot of things," she suggested, seeming to think about it. "Edward play music and reads. I'm sure you could make reading a hoppy, but I'm also very positive that you'll want to do something else, too. So … Well, you can't accompany Alice with her clothes thing. For one, you don't seem to be very interested in that. For the second, she wouldn't let you.

Well, I guess …" She hesitated. I waited, tried to be patient. "Well, maybe you could hang out with me in the garage some day."

I stared at her. Then I smiled hugely. I was suddenly filled with warm happiness. Though she hesitated, she really _had_ asked me to join her in her garage.

And I would.

"Thank you, Rosalie. That means a lot to me," I said.

She smiled. "You know, I'm actually glad that I won't be alone in the garage." She cringed. "It's been some time since Edward joined me."

I grinned at her, a bit apologetically, but only a little, since I knew why he'd been preoccupied.

We went back to the house. Jacob was there, and Rosalie's good mood sank. She still didn't like Jacob too much. I couldn't feel too much pity for him, though, now that it wasn't me that was the loathed one anymore.

Renesmee was up, and I smiled at her. She touched Esme's cheek, said: "Momma," and then reached out for me.

She would soon be too big to carry around. I didn't like that.

I held her closer than usual and went to the piano where Edward and Alice was still busy.

"Can I hear it?" I asked.

They both looked up at me. "It's not finished," Edward mumbled. He sounded almost … Shy.

"I want to hear it all the same," I answered.

He sighed. Then his hands started to move over the keys.

It was one of the most beautiful melodies. It was so full of feelings. Joy, fear, love – sorrow.

I was really starting to become a cry baby. I felt like tears should be running down my cheeks again.

I sighed when he turned to an abrupt stop. I would have to trick the answers concerning this song out of him. Whether he would freely give me them, or I would have to persuade him …

I wouldn't mind the persuasion.

"Edward that was …" I trailed off, not knowing what to say. What _was_ that? Besides from beautiful, of course.

Before I could continue, Carlisle walked through the door.

I turned to look at him. He smiled at me. This smile was full of love. Like the look Charlie had given me when he'd been walking down the aisle with me. He truly did consider me as a daughter.

"Well, now it's official," he announced.

"What?" I asked.

Esme laid her hands at my shoulders. "Carlisle just told the hospital that we're leaving soon."

"How long?" I whispered.

"One month."

I didn't grind my teeth though I felt like it.

One month. I would soon have to go talk to Charlie.

Everything would change. Of course, change wasn't exactly new to me at this point.

"Bella," Esme said, stroking my cheek. "Are you okay?"

I smiled at her. "Yea," I lied. I was getting better at it, though, with the corner of my eye, I noticed Edward grimacing. He, apparently, was the only one noticing my lie.

I sighed and went to the piano, hoping to soon hear the rest of the song.

Despite all of my sorrow, I was happy again. The short distress didn't get much of my attention. I was using all my time on Edward and Renesmee. That was the right thing to do – and as a Cullen, the right thing was almost always the only thing. There was no other option.

I tried to prepare myself for saying goodbye, but I couldn't. I might never see Charlie again.

I sat in the couch beside Emmet, Renesmee in my lab. He kept making annoying sighing sounds as comment to the cartoon on TV that Renesmee was watching. I didn't care. Rosalie, sitting on the other side of Emmet, didn't either. Renesmee was happy because of the crazy characters, and so, none of us could switch canal.

"Hey, could I talk to you for a second?" Jacob suddenly asked behind me. On his tone, I could hear that he was talking to everyone. I got up but left Renesmee on the couch. She briefly looked up at me before her eyes was caught at the TV again.

Emmet and Rosalie got up, too, and went to stand beside me. Esme and Carlisle came down from upstairs, Edward and Alice left the piano, where they were still working, and Jasper appeared from a dark corner.

"What is it?" Alice asked, and her voice was a little annoyed. Edward's face matched her tone. None of them was happy about being disturbed in their creative work.

"Sorry for interrupting your busyness," Jacob groaned, "but I need to talk to you about something very important."

Edward rolled his eyes. "It's not _that_ important," he said, sounding very accusing.

"Tell us," I said to Jacob in a low, bell-like voice.

He smiled gratefully at me. "Well …" He sighed, then spit it out: "I want to come with you."

This didn't really surprise me. Jacob had always been family, and ever since he joined us and imprinted on Renesmee, he had become more and more a part of my _new_ family. But still, for him to leave everything, his father, the pack …

And not only that. Leah would probably follow. She was still a part of Jacob's pack, and she wanted to leave La Push anyway, or so Jacob had said. It was only those two, now, as they'd kind of forced Seth to go back to High School.

"Are you sure, Jacob?" Carlisle asked.

I sighed in relief that they didn't seem to object. The silence had made me cautious.

"Yea," he answered, sounding very sure.

"You don't want to go to college?" I asked teasingly.

He grinned at me. "College can wait, can't it?" he asked, teasing me back.

"Well, then I can see no problem in – "

"I can," Rosalie said, interrupting Carlisle.

Of course she could.

"What is it?" Jacob asked.

"He smells!" Rosalie accused.

"So?" Jacob asked. "I always do."

"Exactly!" Rosalie hissed, as if he'd just agreed to her judgment.

"Rose, we've all sort of grown tuned to it," I noted.

"Not me," she answered and turned to me. "Really, I can't stand to live with that smell forever."

"What do you suggest to be done?" Jacob asked. "Make me sleep outside?"

"Good idea, dog," Rosalie groaned.

"Hey!" I cut in. "There's always a compromise."

"What do you suggest?" Rosalie asked. "I don't want him in the house with his ghastly smell."

"Well, you can't avoid that," I pointed out. "But he doesn't have to _sleep_ there." I shrugged. "He could just live somewhere else."

Jacob stared at me. "Where?"

"Nearby, of course," I said, shrugging.

"That's quite fair," Carlisle said to Rosalie. Rosalie just went straight for the garage.

"Well, then that's settled," Edward sighed, and he and Alice turned back to the piano.

Renesmee's laughter reminded me that I had a responsibility as a mother, and I turned around to go sit by Renesmee's side again.

Only then she stopped laughing.

I stared at the cause of it. Emmet. He'd switched canal, now watching some stupid game.

"Give me that!" I growled, reaching for the remote.

"No dice," Emmet sighed, seeming happy.

"Give it!"

"What you gonna do? Make me?"

"You bet!"

Emmet got to his feet. "Is that a challenge, little sister?" he asked, grinning. Of course. He just wanted a fight.

Well, he was going to get one.

"Outside," I grumbled, and we both turned toward the door.

"No!" Edward suddenly stopped playing. We both ignored him and went outside. Jasper was already there, waiting expectantly.

"The terms?" Emmet asked.

"Same as always," I hissed.

"Excellent. So if I win, you'll call me superior." He seemed pleased by this fact.

I raised my eyebrows. "Not that it makes it true."

Then his entire bodyweight pushed me back as he attacked. I couldn't let him nail me to the ground, so I tried to turn in the fall, rolling aside.

He attacked again, and I had to do the same once more. I didn't let him try again. I reached for his throat with my right arm, but he caught it. My left hand he caught, too. Then his head snapped down, and my head swirled for a few seconds.

That was enough.

He pressed me against the earth, but I wasn't about to give up. I tried to bite him, but his head was suddenly out of reach. I tried to kick his feet off the ground. Impossible.

Then I grounded my nails in his skin.

"Hey!" he moaned and pulled himself far enough away for me to kick myself free.

"Ha!" I snorted.

"So, you want it that way?" he asked, grinning. "Well, then you'll get it!"

In that moment I really feared losing. I wouldn't let him win, but I couldn't see any way I could stop him.

He started to reach for me, but then Esme called for us to stop, her panicky voice very intense.

Because I for a moment forgot about Emmet, I noticed the sound of an engine.

Dang it. I was going to tell Charlie much sooner than expected.

We both tried to look normal, stretching out of our hunting crouch.

"You're not going to get away so easily next time," he hissed under his breath, and I smiled. He wouldn't give up. But neither would I. The battle might be off for now, but the war would continue.

"Hey, dad," I greeted when Charlie stepped out of his car. He looked suspiciously at us. As if he'd seen some part of this. Maybe he had.

I sucked in a deep breath as he came nearer. I might have become better at this, but I didn't want to take any chances with Charlie.

"Hey kiddo. What's up?"

"Nothing," I answered.

Emmet groaned. Too low for Charlie to hear, he mumbled: "Yea, except for everyone continuing to interrupt me showing Bella …"

The last part was too low for even me to hear, but I guessed it wasn't something flattering.

As Charlie went toward the house, I kicked Emmet's leg.

"Ow!"

Charlie turned around. "What?"

"Nothing," I repeated innocently. Emmet frowned at me.

"You going to tell him now?" he whispered. I shook my head. No. I would put this off a little longer. He sighed. "Get it over with. It's going to be the same no matter what."

"Just shut up and smile," I groaned, and followed my own instructions when Charlie sent us another suspicious glance.

"Hello, Nessie," he called when he went inside.

The others were ready, in their positions, Jasper already there. Jacob raised one asking eyebrow at me. I grimaced and shook my head. He nodded once.

"Hey, Charlie," Alice greeted him with a smile. How could she act as if everything was normal?

Emmet hunched for the couch and sighed as he sat down, flipping through the canals.

"What?" I asked him. "No game on?"

He grinned at me. "Well, there'll be a game on tonight, y'know, the one where you'll be one of the players."

Was I the only one who noticed Edward's teeth snap together? Did Charlie notice?

"What? Bella's playing a game?" Charlie asked.

I wanted to run away. It didn't help that Emmet burst into a laugh and Charlie stared at him in bewilder.

"What's so funny?" Charlie asked as Renesmee sat dawn beside him.

"Nothing," I quickly replied, before Emmet could explain. I was sure he planned to.

While Charlie looked at me, Emmet mouthed his next words, and I was grateful that he didn't say them aloud: "Why don't you tell him about your sport now that we're leaving anyway?"

I wanted to challenge him again.

Edward was suddenly standing at my side, his arm around my waste. I was suddenly very calm.

The hours dragged on and on. I tried to really appreciate this last time with Charlie, but I couldn't. It was terrible to know that this was one of the last times I would see him. My heart might not be beating, but it still hurt.

"Well, I'll see ya', kid," he told me when it was starting to get dark, and leaned in to hug me. It was a little awkward with Edward still holding me.

"Yea," was all I could mumble.

As soon as he was gone, I sighed for the who-knows-what-time. I started to wander out into the dark.

"What now, Bella? You going to play your sport?" I heard Emmet from inside, but I ignored him and just dragged Edward with me.

We went to our meadow again, and I sat down in the middle. He sat down beside me, and we looked up at the stars together.

"You didn't tell him."

"I couldn't," I whispered. "It's too hard."

"I could do it. If you want me to."

I sighed. Tempting. "No. I'll have to do it. He deserves that."

"He does," he agreed.

Edward laid his arm around my shoulders and pulled me into the grass so we lay on our bags. We continued to look at the stars. It was beautiful, but nothing compared to him.

"Edward," I whispered, his name sending thrills through my body.

"Hmm?"

"What's the melody about?"

He froze in place. Aha. Well, he wasn't getting out of this one.

"Please, Edward?" I mumbled.

He looked into my eyes, and then he kissed my lips very softly.

Everything disappeared. My mind was clear, no thoughts there. All I could concentrate on was his lips and the sudden sensation running through me. He pulled me closer, and I willingly leaned toward him, but then I froze. My head snapped back.

"Not fair," I accused.

He grinned at me. "I had to try."

I rolled my eyes. Of course he'd tried to sidetrack me. It'd almost worked.

"Now, tell me what it's about," I pleaded.

He pursed his lips. "You seem like you're very obsessed about this."

"I am!" I clarified.

He chuckled. "Well, what if I'm not going to tell you?"

"You are."

"Am I now?"

"Yea," I told him, and this time I kissed him.

"Aah," he sighed. "Well, maybe I am."

I smiled and tugged myself into him. "It sounded very sad," I whispered.

"I do have a very sad story, actually," he told me.

"Tell me about it."

He played with my hair, seeming absence minded. "It started playing inside my head yesterday, when we were here. I was so sad that you were sad."

"Excuse me? That doesn't answer my question."

"Silly Bella. The song is about your sadness."

I turned my head to stare at him. What did that mean?

"You know I can't bear when you're unhappy." He shrugged. "This was my way to get it out."

I thought about that. Then I was suddenly very aware of his arms around me. "I'm quite happy now, you know."

"Quite isn't good enough for me," he noted and leaned down to press his lips to my throat.

I was very stressed with the fact that I had to tell Charlie we were leaving. It didn't help when the others started to talk about packing. Couldn't they slow down a bit? I wanted to say goodbye to my home.

My Forks.

Emmet was probably right. It probably _would_ be better if I just got it over with. But I couldn't make myself. It was too hard. I wondered if I would even be able to leave, when that time came.

"Bella," Alice said one day. "It's part of being a Cullen. Get used to it." She said it a little harshly. Edward send her a warning look, and Jasper was suddenly tense. Great. Alice was the only one who trusted my temper anymore.

Besides, I couldn't get mad at Alice. Not now, anyway.

So I began thinking about how it would be best to do it. I decided that I should take Renesmee with me, so that he could say goodbye to us both. That's it. Not Edward, no Alice, no Jacob, no anybody. He probably wasn't too urgent to say goodbye to them either way.

I wondered if I should take my Ferrari. I smiled, thinking of my Ferrari. Though I didn't like presents, or the fact that the car had been very expensive, I noticed that I _did_ like some parts of it – like the part with the speed.

I wouldn't take the Ferrari, though. I would take Edward's Volvo.

"Renesmee," I called the day I'd chosen for the occasion. Or more precisely – Charlie's execution.

Renesmee came out from the kitchen with Jacob right behind her. They both grinned widely. That grin would be wiped off soon.

"Jacob, you're not coming."

He looked up at me with a glance that was both hard and pleading. No way was I going to fall for that.

Renesmee crawled into my arms and laid her hand against my cheek.

It was a picture of a car, driving.

"We're going to see grandpa," I answered.

"Then why can't I come?" Jacob asked blankly. Renesmee asked me the same question by touching my cheek.

"Because we're going to tell Charlie some very special stuff about … The future," I said hesitantly.

Jacob frowned, knowing what I was about to do.

But I hadn't told Renesmee, and neither had Edward.

"Well … Best of luck."

"Thanks," I mumbled and turned around to go to the garage. Renesmee seemed very confused in my arms.

"Don't worry, Renesmee," I whispered in the car.

She touched my cheek.

"It's nothing, sweetie. Grandpa just has to know that we're going away." Sadness was thick in my voice, and she noticed. She touched my cheek again, asking when we would see him again. "I don't know," I blurred out and then concentrated on not going crazy with sadness. I could feel that Renesmee was sad, too. "Don't be sad," I whispered.

She didn't touch my cheek this time. "My fault," she whispered. "My fault momma not happy."

I stopped the car in an eight part of a second. I turned toward her. "Renesmee, don't ever think that!" I told her. "That's not true! You're one of the reasons that I _am_ happy."

She shook her head. "We have to go because I want to go to school."

Why did she talk? Why didn't she just touch my cheek? Couldn't she explain with pictures as usually, or didn't she want to touch my cheek?

"We'd have to go eventually," I said. "Now, stop that course of thinking!"

She sniffed. I sighed and pulled her into my lab. "I'm sorry, baby. I didn't mean to sound angry or upset. I'm just very sad because of what I'm about to do. Don't be sad."

She laid her hand against my cheek. _Sorry_, the picture said. I frowned. I noticed that her hand held the necklace I gave her for Christmas. I touched it lightly. Then I pulled away the one tear in her eye.

"Nothing is your fault, Renesmee. Just be happy." I hated myself in that moment. I'd been so busy thinking about being miserable, thinking about how to _not_ be miserable, that I'd forgotten how she would take it.

She touched my cheek. I saw a picture of her and me. I was smiling, she was smiling. But then my face turned sad, and then hers did, too. She was trying to tell me that she couldn't be happy if I wasn't.

I tried to smile at her. "I am happy."

She sighed, and I held her closer, not helping her over to her seat. I kept her in my lab the rest of the way.

She ran in front of me as I went to knock on the door. I slightly turned my head to look at the window to my old room. I sighed and concentrated on knocking hard enough for Charlie to hear.

He opened, and his face cracked into a huge smile. "Well, this is a surprise," he greeted. "Hey there, Nessie." Renesmee reached up for him, and she was quickly in his arms. "Come in, come in."

I followed noiselessly behind his loud steps, feeling a deep hole in my stomach. He went to sit in the living room. Nothing had changed since the last time I'd been here.

"So why are you here, kiddo?" he asked. It was not right. He seemed happy that I was here, well, just happy. This was wrong! I could not do this! It would hurt him too much.

But, after all, I had always known I was going to leave him. I had just kept dragging it out, fighting the shadows that grew longer and longer. I couldn't have my night with my stars and my moon if I should also have my day. I had chosen. This was the outcome, and I had known it.

"Well, I needed to talk to you about something very important," I answered and sat down in the chair at his left, memorizing the picture of him and Renesmee.

"Shoot," he laughed. He wouldn't be so cheerful if he knew what was coming for him. I felt like I was betraying him. Like I was ambushing him.

Well, to be fair, I was.

"Charlie," I sighed. "We're leaving."

Renesmee had stopped smiling in Charlie's arms, her eyes serious. Charlie had frozen. He stared at me.

"What do you mean?" he asked incredulous.

"We have to go away, Charlie. We're leaving Forks." I had to drop my eyes. I couldn't look at him, though this would be my last time seeing him.

"What do you mean you have to?" he asked.

I shrugged. He didn't have to know all the details. We were leaving. That was enough.

"When?" he asked. I looked up. His eyes were fearsome.

"Two weeks," I whispered.

The silence dragged on. I could only stare at him, wondering what he was thinking. Maybe it had been a bad idea not bringing Edward.

"Two weeks?" he whispered. Renesmee hugged him, trying to comfort him. I sucked in a deep breath from my left and then went to sit beside him.

"Dad?" I asked, worried now.

"You can't leave."

"Dad, please don't do this to me. I can't bear it."

"Then don't leave." His eyes were begging me, but I couldn't give in. There was no way back now.

"Sorry."

He would be all alone. I would leave him to a life with no stars and no moon, but I would do that to get my own.

Why did it have to be this way? Why couldn't it stay the way it had been the last two years. It hadn't seemed wrong. It hadn't been it. But suddenly, out of nowhere, it was. And I just had to live with that.

His eyes were blank, and though I didn't like it, I kept looking at him.

"Don't go, Bella," he whispered.

"Oh, dad," I mumbled and hugged him in to me, trapping Renesmee between us. "Please don't cry, please don't."

"I'm sorry, Bells."

We sat there for at least half an hour. I didn't want to leave. I wanted to keep comforting him, but he wouldn't stop cry while I was still there.

"Bye," I whispered with Renesmee in my arms.

"Bye," he whispered back.

I hugged him again, for once not holding up my guard. I took deep breath, remembering the smell.

I felt the venom in my mouth, felt my mouth water, but I didn't give in.

I sighed. "I'm really going to miss you," I whispered.

"You too, Bells."

Then Renesmee did something she shouldn't. She reached out for Charlie's cheek, and I froze. What I should have done was to turn away so she wouldn't reach, but the habit I'd picked up from Edward hang in there.

Charlie's eyes widened. I stared at him. What did he think? Was he scared? I was.

"Dad."

He sighed. "It's all so strange. It feels as if you're part of a whole new life. A life I can't be a part at." How could he feel that? Wasn't he just human?

"She's going to miss you," I mumbled and stroked Renesmee's cheek. "And so will I."

"You too, Bells, you too," he mumbled.

"Bye," I whispered and kissed his cheek.

"Bye, Isabella."

Everyone was making ready to leave. There was only a few hours left till we would leave Forks. I couldn't believe it. The time had both dragged on endlessly and then also passed too quickly.

I was watching Renesmee sleep. When she woke up, we would either be leaving or had already left. It was unbearable.

"Bella, love, are you okay?" Edward asked and laid his arms around me.

"I don't think so," I murmured and turned around to bury my face in his chest. "It feels like I'm breaking, Edward. I'm leaving something behind me here."

"We'll return in a few years," he said, trying to comfort me.

I sighed. "A few years for us are probably Charlie's death. When we return, everybody we know will have to be gone."

His lips went for a journey up and down my jaw. "You're right," he mumbled against my throat. "I'm sorry."

I frowned. No. He could not be regretting making me a vampire.

"I'll survive," I promised. "There is something I want to do, though."

"Your word, my demand."

I smiled. "I'd like to say goodbye."

His silence was a question.

"Come."

He followed without further questions, though I knew he was curious. We ran through the forest, soon where I wanted to be.

We stood very still beside each other and stared at the buildings that formed the school where we first met.

I grasped his hand and he squeezed it. It was sad to leave this place. It felt as if I at last was laying my human life behind me. I feared I might forget everything that had happened here when we left.

"Look," I mumbled and pointed out the building where I had my first biology class.

He chuckled. "How many events happened there without anyone noticing?"

"You almost killing me, our first conversation …" I mumbled.

"You remember that movie we saw?"

I laughed. "It was as if the room was suddenly filled with electricity," I said. His lips pressed against my hair.

"Come," I said, pulling him with me.

We went to another very important place now. My house.

Charlie's house.

We climbed in through the window and suddenly stood in an empty room except for my bed and the table with the computer.

I sat down and looked around. He sat down with me and pulled me into his arms. He started humming my lullaby, and I closed my eyes shut. The blackness and the sound of his voice pulled me into a strange kind of calmness.

We soon after left the house, moving to another place.

Our clearing.

"This place," I whispered and sat down. "I think I'm going to miss it the most."

He circled the meadow a few times before he joined me on the grass.

I turned to look at him. I suddenly smiled, and he looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

"What?" he asked.

I smiled. "All of it isn't worth anything without you," I answered. I laid my head on his shoulder and played with his hair with my right hand and touched his lips with my left. My left hand moved up over his nose, and he closed his eyes. I touched his eyelids and wondered how any creature could be so beautiful. Of course I already knew why. It was Edward.

"I love you," I mumbled and kissed his marble lips. He kissed me back.

"Love you more," he promised.

"Impossible," I argued.

He stared into my eyes, and I enjoyed that rather much. "Could I please … Hear?" he whispered, and I knew what he meant.

I raised my hand to my temples and concentrated on my shield. I pulled it back. But I didn't know what he wanted to know, so my mind just flew around by itself.

All my worries, my love for him, Renesmee and the rest of the family. The way Emmet bugged me with his jokes, his fingers playing the piano. My love for the sound of my lullaby, for –

His lips pressed themselves hard against mine, the shield snapping back into place. I kissed him back, knowing I'd given him what he'd wanted.

"Well, that's it," Alice clarified.

We were all ready to go. Edward and I had said goodbye to our cottage. Now it was time for the house.

We all stood in front of the house for a few seconds, and then they all went to the cars. I stood there with Renesmee in my arms. They had all tried this before, but I hadn't. This was my home.

But our next place would be home, too, because home to me was where Edward was, where Renesmee was.

We were going to live in Denali, in the city of Shale, a cold place with lot of snow.

As we drove, I thought of the story. It was the same as in Forks; just now there was another Hale in the family. I was supposed to be Esme's niece, as Rosalie also pretended to be, and Rosalie's and Jaspers cousin.

Renesmee, though, was supposed to be Edward's biological little sister. Carlisle said this would make the most sense, since they had the same color hair.

Jacob would follow us, but he would stay at our house, only coming into the public eye very rarely. The story for him was very simple – he didn't have any. If anyone saw him, we would just say he was a close family friend. I wasn't sure Rose would be able to tell that properly, but otherwise, it would be fine.

I would attend to high school like the others, Jasper, Emmet and Rosalie had decided to start from scratch, too, though I wasn't as sure as them at my self control. And also, I didn't like to waste more time not being with Renesmee.

I didn't want to go to college in New Hampshire because that would certainly take much of my time, so high school it was.

I had insisted on that I would be the one to handle the birth certificates this time, and Jasper hadn't put much of a show on. Alice had been on my side, knowing that I wasn't just going to let Jasper scare J. Jenks that way again.

So everything was fine. Everything was going to be absolutely perfect. I tried to shake all worries off of me and look ahead for a new future.


	6. Chapter 6

6. New Life

Alice's eyes were blank, her mind certainly somewhere else. I looked worried at her. What would she see?

"Ah," she sighed. "Everything will be fine."

"But," I choked out, and she sent me a disapproving look. The last hours I had done nothing but coming up with excuses for Renesmee to stay.

"What now?" she asked.

I turned to look at Edward. "What if she meets someone who is just as appealing to her as I was to you?" I asked.

Alice cleared her throat, and I looked at her again. "Bella, did you not just hear me saying that everything would be fine?"

I scowled at her. Then I gave up.

We got into the car. After we'd left Renesmee at the school, we would go for high school.

I didn't know how I felt about this. I had decided, with Edward's help, that I would go through it all step by step. Not hastily or anything. Step by step.

We drove into the parking lot, and I got out. Alice held Renesmee out for me, and we all walked toward the school buildings.

There was a wall between the street and the school, the only way out a huge gate.

Renesmee was in her school-uniform, tense for her first day. I was happy that she was happy. I had to be. She couldn't be happy if I wasn't.

Alice went to talk with the receptionist. Then she let us to Renesmee's class.

On the way, Edward and I reminded her the rules. Not too close to humans, no mental pictures, no being too smart, and no non-human movements.

She nodded each time, understanding.

We went inside the class. There were other parents and their children here. It was common that parents went with their children the first day of school. I sighed. It might not look too well that Dr. Cullen let his three adopted children do this task, but Edward and I had insisted.

"Hello," a woman greeted us. She had carrot colored hair, green eyes, was very little, thin and wrinkled. She smiled cautiously at us. Her instincts told her to stay away, but her consciousness didn't notice this. "I am Ms. Gores, the teacher in this class."

"Hello," Edward greeted her politely. It had been months since I'd heard or seen him put on his human ways. I decided not to say too much. I didn't have much practice around humans. "I'm Edward Cullen, this is my sisters," he shortly grimaced at the word, "Bella and Alice Cullen."

We both smiled at her. I was sure that, as in Forks, the real story would soon be known – that Edward and I was a couple, though we used the reference brother and sister, because it was easier not to go into depths.

"Hello," she said again. "And who might this be?"

"This is Renesmee," Edward said.

Renesmee, standing at my side, reached for my hand, and I squeezed it. She looked up at me, and I smiled.

"No need to be afraid. Come on," Ms. Gores said friendly.

Renesmee stepped toward her, and then turned to look at us. She smiled widely. She winked. "Bye."

I winked at her, my heart overwhelmed with love.

"You staying? Most parents do the first day, but you're not her parents, I'm guessing."

I wanted to snap her head off, but instead, I tried to keep my face expressionless. I was pretty sure my mouth was a hard line.

"No, we're not staying," Edward said.

"We all have classes to attend to," Alice added.

"Of course," Ms. Gores smiled. "Have a nice day."

"You too," Edward said.

We turned and left the room. Outside, I tried to calm myself. Edward touched my cheek, and I felt a little better, as I always did when he touched me.

"Come on, we have to hurry to make it there," Alice complained.

I smiled. "You're asking vampires to hurry?" I asked. There was nobody around.

She grinned at me. "Yea, because they're unusually slow these days."

We got into the car, Edward on the driver's seat. He started the engine and we were on our way.

I was strangely nervous, not sure what to expect. But we would be juniors, just starting at high school. We wouldn't be the only new students, so the thunder wouldn't be on us.

The others were waiting in the parking lot of Shale high school. I couldn't help grinning a little, though the others had told me that it scared humans when our teeth were too visible. I composed my face as we caught up with the others.

"Now, Bella," Emmet concluded and laid his arm around my shoulder, smiling hugely. "You shall now enter what will soon be the portal of boredom! Each day here will be torment!"

Though it was summer, there was snow. I smiled, slowly, probably quickly for human eyes, pulled a ball of snow together, and threw it at him.

"Hey, hey," he laughed. "You don't want to make me come over there." But he'd already thrown his own ball toward me. I lifted my hand and it splinted into pieces there.

I was just about to continue the battle when Rosalie cough to achieve our attention. "Act normal, please," she sighed.

We grinned at her. I winked at Emmet and mouthed without sound: "She gonna get it after school?"

He grinned back and nodded grimly. I knew that after we were done with Rosalie, he would turn on me.

_Let him come_, I thought, starting to plan ahead.

We'd been talking with the assistant for a few minutes, renewing our schema so that I would never have a class without one of them. It didn't go fast at all. The people of Shale had, of course, quickly heard about Mr. Cullen and his wife who'd been adopting a lot of teenagers, and no one knew that they would never meet as polite kids as the Cullens yet. Instead they thought we were a bunch of trouble makers, that Mr. Cullen and Ms. Cullen couldn't handle us.

I smiled bitterly. Maybe there would be one of the teenagers that would be hard to handle. The crazed newborn – I still had issues with my tempers sometimes.

But I would behave. I would try to be good. For Renesmee. For Edward. For my family.

"Shall we?" Edward asked and handed me my new schedule. "Your first class is with Rose."

They really hadn't managed better than that? My first class would be with Rosalie. Not that I wouldn't survive. I just wasn't sure how well it would go when Rosalie was the one to bring me through the first class.

I looked at the schedule. Aah. It was not only one hour. I did not only have Spanish with her. I also had biology with her, though this was later.

Edward smiled apologetically at me. "See you at lunch." He kissed my forehead and went off with Emmet, grinning stupidly as always.

I sighed and turned toward Rosalie. She winked at me, and I followed in the other direction as the others. I looked at the schedule. Spanish.

"It's better if we sit the farthest from the blackboard," Rosalie said. "That way the kids don't notice us that much."

I nodded. "Okay."

"Bella, it's going to be fine," Rosalie sighed.

I looked up at her. There was something I had never seen in her eyes before, so I couldn't put a word on it. I shook it off me.

"What? I'm just worried about Renesmee," I assured her.

She rolled her eyes. "Sure you are."

I scowled at her. "What do I, Bella _Cullen_, have to worry about?"

She smiled a crooked smile. "That's a very good question."

I gave up the defensive. "You're right. I am worried. Worried about …" I hesitated, and then whispered: "Slipping."

Her face grew morose. "Bella, you're not going to slip."

"You don't know that."

"I've never heard of anyone so much in control as you."

"Someone … Appealing could come by."

"That's not very likely."

"Nothing's likely about me, but it happens anyway."

She laughed a dazzling laugh, and two boys turned toward us. "True," she agreed.

We continued in silence. I walked in wonder, trying to figure out this new Rosalie.

Rosalie led me to the end of the class, picking an empty table.

Inside in this crowded, small, room, all the smells were so potent. I could smell it all, smell those who were more appealing than others. My throat burned. It felt as if I was going to die if I didn't –

I stopped the thought, holding my breath. I could do this. I would not disappoint them. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Rosalie smiling at me. "Don't worry," she whispered and very lightly touched my arm.

I sighed. "Thanks." Maybe it was just right that it was Rosalie that was in my first class. Maybe everything _was_ going to be all right.

I looked at my schedule as the teacher approached. Mr. Bred. He did look like he had some Spanish blood in him.

He introduced himself and then made us all say our names aloud. I played with my hair, nervous. After talking, I wondered if I should take in another breath. Just in case.

My throat burned again, the fire turning it into what felt like ash. I tried to focus on the class. I didn't want to be the only non – perfect Cullen. That would be too embarrassing. But my Spanish had never been well, so I knew I would have to practice. For now, Spanish could be my hoppy.

But was Mr. Bred continued into the hour, I felt how everything he said kind of just layered itself in my brain. His way of pronouncing the different words was soon a part of me. When he asked me for some answer, I was correct, my speech fluid.

"Wow," I muttered under my breath.

Rosalie tried not to snicker at my side.

So as Spanish grew part of my mind, as I realized my mind didn't have to be entirely fixed on Mr. Bred, I thought about Renesmee. What was _she_ learning? Then I thought of Edward. He was somewhere near me. Maybe he was keeping one eye on me through Rosalie. He would come as quickly as he could if anything went wrong. Alice was probably also looking out for my future.

Knowing that Edward was near me, keeping an eye on me, without me being able to be near _him_, without being able to keep an eye on the meaning of my existence, I grew a little irritated.

I concentrated on my sharp senses then, trying to listen for him. I tried to listen for his voice when he was answering a question. All I heard was Jasper, explaining something in calculus.

I sighed. Either he was too far away, or he was just being as still as ever.

I sighed again. Then something occurred to me. I ducked my head down, closing my eyes. I tried to focus on my shield, pulling it back. It was hard. There was so much else to think of. It started to spin in my temples, giving me a strange form of headache.

_I know you're listening to Rosalie's thoughts. That must be very annoying for you, though I guess Rosalie _is_ better than Mike or Jessica._

The shield snapped right back into place, and I looked up again, feeling a bit smug. In a strange way, it was kind of fun saying something to Edward, knowing he couldn't answer. I wondered if Emmet had ever used that to say something insulting. I hoped not.

The bell rang, and both Rosalie and I got to our feet. I wondered if I had ever learned as much from a Spanish class as from this one, knowing it had nothing to do with the teacher.

Calculus was my next subject – with Jasper and Emmet. I wondered if there was any way that could go _well_.

Calculus was in the other end of the school. I said goodbye to Rosalie, smiling at her '_good luck'_, and crossed the school yard. It was snowing. It didn't bother me, but I still cringed a little to look human. Jasper was waiting halfway for me.

"So how's your first day at school?" he asked.

"Different," I sighed.

"Cheer up, Bella. You only have a few more hours left. Take it one step at a time. For example: right now you only have to survive the hour with Emmet."

I stared at him. "Thanks for the information. Like he's going to last through the hour without making inappropriate comments." I rolled my eyes.

He grinned at me. "He's not."

"What's up, sis?" Emmet called through the hall. People stared at his big figure.

"What's up is you shutting your mouth through the next hour," I muttered when we stood beside him. "Or else you're doomed."

"Ooh, I'm shaking with fear."

"You should be."

I sat beside Jasper, Emmet on my right, sitting at the next table. Why couldn't he have taken his seat farthest away from me?

Again, we were sitting in the back of the class. We were hardly noticed.

Calculus was much like Spanish. I had been fairly good at calculus, but now it was like the numbers swirled around in my head like a river, making a whole new sense to me.

Emmet leaned against me, whispering too low for anyone but Jasper to hear: "You're counting the hours till nightfall, right?"

"Shut up!" I hissed under my breath. A girl sitting at the desk in front of Jasper and I slightly turned, and Emmet glided back into his seat.

The class continued, and every now and then, Emmet would lean toward me and mumble something seriously annoying.

I was finally free, and it was time for lunch. I sighed happily. Emmet got up and looked at me. "Why are you so relieved? Did someone tell you I'd stop?"

I grumbled. I would have to challenge him again. Soon.

The others were already at a table. The new Cullen table. Jasper, Emmet and I went to pay for the tray of food that we would eat anything from, and then went back to the others. I sat down beside Edward. He glanced harshly at Emmet. He'd been listening again.

Emmet grinned at him. Whatever Emmet was thinking, it only made Edward's face tighten even more. I touched his hand, and he turned toward me.

"So how did you know I was listening?" he asked, accusation in his eyes.

I smiled wider, trying not to grin. "Please, Edward! I know you," I answered and rolled my eyes. Then I mentally looked at my schedule again.

"So who's going to be with me in gym?" I asked and grimaced – this was the only class I didn't know who I would have to embrace it with. I would have to concentrate on this one – how ironic that when I was finally better than any professional at the class I'd always dreaded, I had to try to be bad'er than I was.

Emmet nudged my rib with his elbow. "I think it's going to be so much fun," he laughed.

I looked pleadingly at Edward. He stroked my cheek. In his eyes, I saw a promise. As soon as the Cullens were known as the best students of the school, which wouldn't take long, he would do whatever he could to be in all of my classes.

I smiled at this. I could manage a few weeks with Emmet. Hopefully.

I looked at the tray of food, looking at a slice of pizza. I wondered how it would taste now that I was a vampire. It didn't smell appealing. How had I ever could like this as a human?

"Bella," Alice sighed, and I saw her roll her eyes.

I grinned at her. "I just want to try."

I grabbed the pizza and heard Jasper snicker in his seat beside Alice. Emmet and Rosalie were looking at me now; Edward's eyes had never left me.

"You're going to regret that," Emmet boomed.

"We'll see," I mumbled, closing my mouth around the end of the pizza.

Whatever memory I had of tasty Pizza was erased. It tasted _awful_! I cough, lifted my hand to my mouth and spat it out.

"Ew! Gross!"

Emmet laughed. "I told you so."

I dried my hands with a serviette and looked up at Edward. "That was _nothing_ like eating dirt!"

He smiled that crooked smile at me. "Sorry, love, but I didn't know how to compare." I smiled at him. There was no need to forgive – there never had been anything to forgive.

"Ahem," Emmet called. "What?"

"Nothing you need to know of," I growled at him.

He looked puzzled for a moment, and then he grinned widely. "Oh. Yea. Of course not, little sister."

"Ah, let it _go_!" I groaned, fighting to keep my voice level.

He whistled innocently. "Never," he muttered under his whistling.

Edward, Alice and I went to class. We sat at a table in the end of the class, just as in Spanish and calculus. Alice had her own table, like Edward had had what seemed so many years back before I came to Forks.

I didn't know what I'd expected from English. Maybe something a bit like Spanish. But no. I had always been pretty good at this subject. I had always been in front of the others in English, so at some point it didn't surprise me that this class was both annoying and boring. The first time I went through high school, it had been boring at some parts. Now it was boring at all parts.

So, since I didn't need to concentrate on the subject, I watched Edward. I wouldn't ever get used to his perfection. When I looked at him this time, I didn't stop breathing because of the uncomfortable smell of all the kids surrounding me. I stopped breathing because he could still knock the breath out of me.

I turned my head just as he glanced at me. People would sort of start notice if we just sat there and stared at each other as the lovebirds we were. I smiled at that.

I suddenly felt his hand around mine, and I smiled. The light touch was enough to make my head and stomach filled with butterflies.

I was a bit dazzled when the bell rang again for my next class.

"See ya after gym," Alice said, grinning at me. I grimaced.

"Sure," I said, doubt in my voice. How would I survive an hour of gym with Emmet without ending up in some kind of fight? It wasn't because I exactly wanted to fight Emmet – okay, that was a lie. I wanted that very much. The case just was that none of us would let the other one have the last word, let the other one win for good.

Biology I was quite good at, too, so it left my mind free again. Edward was on my mind again.

Rosalie smiled knowingly at me when we parted. She seemed to be the only one, maybe besides Edward, who knew what was coming for me.

Emmet waited for me in the gym hall. I grimaced at him. "Y'know, we better be a team," I suggested. "That way you'll easier keep an eye on me, and I won't slip."

He smiled. "Sure, sure," he agreed, and I knew it would end up as a competition anyway.

Emmet and I took our positions for the tennis game we were about to win. It didn't take anything of me to smash the ball back at the others, but it took everything to not send it through the wall.

And there _did_ go competition into it.

"Ready?" Emmet whispered, his voice too low for anyone to hear.

I smiled. "Sure."

"Who can act most human?" he asked.

"That's a very tough question."

"Well, we're about to find out." And then he served.

It was a hard match – I actually let the humans get some points just to seem more human. Emmet was much more proud of being undefeated, so he was in kind of a dilemma – he had to lose at one place to win the other. Too late he decided to follow my lead, but by then, the match was over.

"I guess I win," I smiled at him.

He scowled at me. "You spent too much time with Alice. You're just as annoying."

I smiled wider at him, showing my teeth a little. "I take that as a compliment, especially when it's from you."

"Enough! Next – who win over most points?"

"Okay," I agreed. We smiled at each other with impatient smiles. When it was finally our turn again, the humans didn't get any points at all. I fought with my desire to use all the strength, and fought against Emmet's raising number of points.

"Well, little sister," he grinned at me. "Who's the best?"

"I am," I answered and shrugged. "The fact that you win this one doesn't make you better."

"Of course it does. You're just afraid of looking into the eyes of truth."

"Aah, poetic, Emmet. Why don't we have some fun this time?" I asked.

"I _am_ having fun," he answered.

"You're going to have even more fun."

"How?"

Then, at the same moment, we looked at our next competition. It would be easy. But we didn't have to make it boring.

"I get it," he smiled. "Who can humiliate them the most?"

"Exactly," I hissed.

"Well, I'm going to win that one, too. You're too tame to ever being able to humiliate anyone."

"Don't say that," I murmured, saving his words for later. He was going to suffer for that.

I fought to humiliate the humans the most. It was so much fun when I made the one human do exactly what I'd done in gym so long time ago in badminton. Her partner rubbed his arm and she smiled apologetically as she massaged her head. I did feel a little bad for her, vaguely remembering the humiliation. And then I knew I must have won.

But Emmet did some nasty stuff to the humans, too. He made the boy fall into the net and make a forward roll onto our half of the battlefield.

Gym ended before one of us could make the final move to win. We both sighed, wanting to win the battle.

"Next time," he mocked.

"You're going down."

We went to the parking lot. My first day of my second time at high school hadn't been that bad, after all. Well, if I ignored the fact that Emmet didn't stop with his comments, and that his face looked as if he was coming up with more.

With me in the family, there was almost no room in the Volvo, but we could manage. Still, we used two cars. Rosalie's BMW awaited Emmet, and I grinned at him as I went for the Volvo.

"How was school," Edward asked, smiling at me.

I smiled back at him, getting into the seat beside him. "Are all classes that boring?" I asked. Okay, the hours spent on high school of Shale hadn't been that boring, but the subjects had. But I was sure everything in this place would soon be boring.

"Pretty much," Alice answered before he could say anything.

"Esme picked Renesmee up, right?" I asked.

"Yes, she did," Alice said. "Though Jacob wasn't too happy about that."

I smiled. Jacob liked my Ferrari. He wouldn't let a chance of driving it pass him. Still, he had to stay out of the public eye as much as possible.

"How many hours have I lost?" I whispered then.

Edward gave me a stiff smile. "Just two, love."

"It's going to end up in more," Alice reminded. I could have choked her.

"Alice, could you stop being the most annoying existence of the universe for just a few seconds, please?" Edward asked.

She grinned at him. "No way."

Like in Forks, our house was buried in the forest. It was a big house with big rooms. Edward and I had a room that was double as big as Charlie's living room back in Forks.

The house was very open. The front door turned toward south. Huge windows decorated the walls, and the wall facing east was entirely glass.

There was only one pair of stairs, but it let all the way around in a half-circle.

When we entered, Renesmee and Jacob came out from the kitchen. Emmet, Rosalie and Jasper was already in the couch.

"Momma, I have –"Renesmee shrieked, but then she was in my arms, and she touched my cheek, and she was already starting to show me everything.

I was suddenly overwhelmed by the strength of her memories. I saw her leaving me, I saw my own hard expression, and remembered how I'd tried not to make Ms. Gores feel for thinking I wasn't Renesmee's mother.

I saw Renesmee's day through her eyes, saw the thrill there. I saw her meet the other children, I saw how she both mixed in and parted from them. I felt strangely jealous. She would never have to hide like the others and I.

I shoved the feeling away and listened carefully to her day. I saw how hard it had been for her in the pause to act normal, to try to be bad at all the games. I saw how she tried to be _stupid_. I cringed at the word. The other kids weren't stupid; they just weren't as forward as she was.

And finally I felt her anger with the teacher, and I felt strangely alarmed, until I realized that this was because Ms. Gores didn't teach her anything she didn't already know. I smiled at this, recognizing the feeling.

"She did well," Jacob stated, suddenly beside me. I had been so intent on Renesmee's pictures, that I hadn't noticed that he'd come to stand beside me.

"I guess she did," I mumbled. I bend down to let her out of my arms, but she cringed. "What's wrong?" I asked her. I straightened my bag again.

She touched my cheek and showed me the same pictures again, but now they were covered by a new feeling. Sorrow. Something was missing. She missed someone.

I smiled at her. "I missed you, too."

"Rosalie," Emmet suddenly said, getting to his feet. I looked up, and he winked at me. I knew what was coming.

"Take her!" I whispered and gave Renesmee to Jacob. Renesmee looked sadly at me. "I'll soon be back."

"What?" Rosalie asked.

"Come," Emmet said and went for the door.

"What is it?" Rosalie asked unknowingly. She got up and followed. I did, too.

Outside in the cold, Emmet suddenly caught up a handful snow and threw it at her. From behind her, I send my own snowball into her hair.

"Hey!" she screamed. Her hair was glistening with the snow that wasn't likely to melt in her hair. Her eyes grew tight. "Let me in."

"Sorry, Rose, but your hair aren't going to save you now," Emmet excused.

"Is it not?" she hissed. She turned toward me. "Together, we could beat him," she mouthed so that Emmet couldn't see it.

I didn't let her give me the choice twice. I picked up another handful snow, but instead of throwing it at Rosalie, I threw it at Emmet.

"Betrayer!" he accused.

"What? You didn't see it coming?" I laughed.

Rosalie and I walked toward him. He stepped back, then he threw himself at us. The snow was everywhere. Then I felt his huge body against mine, and I was suddenly on the ground. I blinked in astonishment.

"Don't destroy your clothes!" I heard Alice yell, but none of us heard her.

Rosalie was probably very likely to hurry inside, but Emmet wasn't letting either of us get through, standing in our way.

"Ah, Emmet, please," Rosalie sighed.

Emmet looked at her with a grim grin. Oh.

I stepped back as Rosalie turned on me, too. "That's not fair," I growled. Then I composed myself for the battle.

Edward was suddenly at my side. I sighed in relief. "Thanks."

"Any time, love."

And then the battle of the front yard began. In one second it was no longer a front yard, but a battle field.

"You take west, I take south," Edward said.

I nodded. Roughly translated – I take Rosalie, he take Emmet.

We launched ourselves at them, but all four of us was suddenly bombed with snow. We stopped and looked toward the house where Alice and Jasper were standing, the smile of an angel on Alice's face.

For a few seconds, I felt bad. Jacob probably wanted to join us, but the snow would probably melt in his hands before he could throw it.

But then Emmet attacked me from my bag, and I had no more time for Jacob.

The fight lasted for hours. None of us grew tired, none of us was annoyed with the wet clothes – except for Alice, but that was because of something different than being uncomfortable.

"Bella!" Edward called from my right. Before Emmet could knock me to the ground, Edward had pulled me away.

I sighed, a bit annoyed. "Let's take him."

I just saw Edward nod, and then we ran toward Emmet. Rosalie was too late. Emmet was ours.

"Get off of me!" Emmet growled. Edward and I sat on his stomach, watching his face turn from smug to hurt.

"Do we win?" I asked.

"Su –"

"No way!" Jasper laughed, and then I was the one held hostage.

"Alice," I said.

"What now, Bella?" Alice asked.

"How much do you love me?" I asked.

She grimaced. "I'm not letting you go."

I muttered unintelligibly. "Damn it."

"Do you give up? If you do, we give Bella free," Alice called to Edward and nudged my cheek.

I grumbled and fought against Jasper's arms, but he was too strong. "Don't give in!" I told Edward. I tried everything, but I couldn't get free. "That's annoying," I sighed.

Jasper chuckled.

Then Jaspers hands were suddenly much subtler, and I ripped my arms from him. I turned around and saw him fighting Renesmee. I threw myself instinctively at him. I wrapped his arm around across his stomach, grabbed Renesmee, and then ran away.

Then I realized what I'd done. I turned around.

"Aw, Bella," Jasper mumbled.

"Sorry."

I had followed my instinct to protect my child. I hadn't been thinking. Now I'd hurt Jasper.

"Really, Bella, I'm fine." He looked fine. But still, it didn't change fact.

I looked down at Renesmee. Her eyes were hard as she watched Jasper, but when she looked at me, it was examining. As if she was looking to see if I was all right.

"Renesmee, don't ever do that again!" I gasped. I could have hurt Jasper!

"You go right ahead and continue," I said to the others and went for the front door. Jasper smiled at me, and it helped. Alice didn't seem angry, either, so that was good.

I sat down in the couch and sighed. Edward laid his arms around me. My head dropped to his shoulder.

"Cool, Bella," Jacob said and let himself fall into the couch.

I cringed. I wasn't so sure about that.

"Renesmee, don't you have homework to do?" I asked.

Renesmee just flew from my lab, followed by Jacob. I curled up against Edward and squeezed my eyes shut. I wanted to go see what Renesmee was doing, I wanted to be with her. But I had to calm myself. I had attacked Jasper. I had truly attacked him.

I heard the others approach – it was impossible to not hear Emmet's laugh. I turned around and looked apologetically at Jasper.

"Jasper, I'm so sorry, I –"

"Don't worry about it, Bella," Jasper cut me off and got over to the couch. "It barely hurt, Bella. I was just surprised by the attack from Renesmee. It was what there would be expected from a mother." He winked.

I smiled weakly. "So you're really okay?"

"Bella, you couldn't hurt him if you wanted to," Emmet noted. I send him a sour glance, knowing I would be able to hurt _him_.

"Cheer up, Bella," Jasper smiled and ruffled my hair.

As he got up and went up to his room, I looked dead scared at Alice. Was she angry with me?

But Alice smiled at me and sat down beside me. "Don't worry Bella. You worry too much, that has always been your problem." She hugged me and kissed my cheek. "Now, go out and help Renesmee with whatever she's doing. I know you want to."

I smiled gratefully at her and went to the kitchen. Renesmee was doing some math problems.

I went to sit beside her. I laid my hand on her hair. "I'm so sorry if I seemed angry at you before," I said. She lifted her brown eyes to mine, and then her entire face lit up by a smile, as if a piece of the sun was inside her. Or a piece of a star.

I sat there and watched her as she went forward in the calculus book, helped her when she asked for it.

"So adorable," I mumbled, too low for anyone but Edward, with his arms around me, to hear. His hand touched my cheek and caressed around it.

In my mind I did the homework I had to get done till tomorrow. I didn't need anything but a scratch, and I didn't need to write it down. I could easily remember it.

Renesmee yawned. "Sweetie, you can't use your entire day on homework," I told her and touched her hair. So smooth.

"Okay, momma," she yawned.

I smiled at her and let her climb into my arms where she soon fell asleep. My brave little girl. I wondered what she'd been thinking when she attacked Jasper. I wondered why Jacob hadn't stopped her. Well, Jacob wouldn't stop Renesmee in doing anything if she really wanted to, I realized, and frowned.

"Jacob, the next time she tries to do such a thing again, please stop her," I said.

He just grinned, and I knew he hadn't agreed.

"Bella, haven't you noticed that it's grown dark?" Emmet called from the living room. "Don't you have a schedule that requires your attention?"

I decided to ignore him. He just wanted a fight.

I hummed Renesmee's lullaby to calm myself and Renesmee. She snored a bit. I kissed her cheek. Then I went up the stairs, where she had her own room. Here I laid her in her bed. I sat down on the edge and watched her sleep, watched her breathe.

"She's beautiful," I murmured when I felt Edward beside me.

"Of course she is," he agreed and kissed my forehead. "You're her mother."

I smiled at him. Then I wrapped my hand in his. Lust suddenly took over my senses, and in a few seconds, we were on our way into the forest go get some privacy.

"No!" Alice said with a firm voice. She almost scared me.

"Alice, I don't think you should decide whether – "

"Stop right there!" she snarled, cutting me off. I rolled my eyes. I should have chosen a different place for this. A place with lots of lots of humans so that she would have to act normal.

"Alice, please just let me –"I stopped. She'd crouched down, ready to snap at me. "Alice, take it easy!" I gasped, lifting my hands, palms forward.

"Alice, please let her talk," Jasper said at her side. We were outside the house, where I'd caught them as they came home from a hunting trip.

"No!" Alice growled.

Edward, I was surprised he hadn't showed up the minute Alice started getting defensive, suddenly stood by my side, his arm in front of me.

"Can't we act civilized?" I asked sourly. Today it wasn't me being the cranky one.

"Alice, I want to know what she has to say," Jasper said lightly, trying to bring her back on earth.

It surprised me that both Alice and Edward said "No" at the same time.

"But Edward – " I protested.

"I don't think it's a good idea," he said in a low voice. He send me a glance with eyes like an angel. They were tormented, those eyes.

I looked at Jasper. He looked back at me. Then, without really thinking, we both sprinted off from the others.

While we ran, I wondered how badly Edward and Alice wanted to make me not say what I wanted to say. But I knew how badly _I_ wanted to say this to Jasper.

I could hear them somewhere behind us. Very badly, then. I couldn't see how they hadn't, especially Alice, seen this coming.

"Shield!" Jasper called.

"Oh, right," I snorted. Of course I'd forget something that simple.

I didn't need to concentrate on making my shield bigger. It was something else than making it disappear. Now Jasper was under my shield, and I could feel him there.

He grinned at me, and we only had to run for a little while longer. No dice Alice hadn't already seen us here, but we found a good spot – a spot that could be anywhere.

"So," Jasper said. "What is it you need to say, that Alice and Edward objects so much to?"

I smiled. "Remember Emmet? Your second brother. The big one."

"The one who constantly trick you into fighting with him? Sure," he answered, grinning widely.

I grimaced. As late as yesterday, Emmet had actually won – and won big – and I had had to call him superior. And his jokes had gone much worse. Ugh.

"So what with him?" Jasper asked.

"I can't stand for him to win any more fights!" I answered, gritting my teeth. "It's driving me insane."

"And that involves me because …?" I could hear some kind of hope there. Jasper was a warrior, no matter how much Alice hated it.

I smiled. "I thought you might wanted to help me."

He pretended to think about it for a few seconds. "Of course I'll help you," he said then.

"Thank you so much!" I sighed.

"Hey, everything for my sister," he said, nudging me with his elbow.

"Don't make me angry," I warned him teasingly, laughed at the end.

He laughed with me. "Yea, I hear you're the most dangerous thing out there," he said sarcastically.

"That's it!" I laughed and launched out playfully at him. He jumped away.

"Too slow!"

"Too slow? I'll give you slow! Try beating me back to the house. I'll give you one second in advantage!"

He rolled his eyes. "I don't need advantages."

I shrugged. "Go!"

We ran in a cascade of snow. His hair was all silver in the light of the snow and sun. My hair must be almost just as light. I could feel the snow in it.

"We're back!" I declared when we were in front of the house again. Edward and Alice was waiting for us.

I pulled back my shield from Jasper as I went over to Edward.

"Why did you have to do that?" he asked as I greeted his arms. "Why can't you just ignore Emmet?"

I stared at him. "Ignore Emmet? No way! I'm not going to let him make all those jokes." I snorted. "It's very distracting!"

I didn't tell him exactly _why_ it was distracting. All he knew was that I found it embarrassing – which I certainly did –, but it also took my mind elsewhere, when I needed it to do something other than letting Emmet's jokes take my focus.

From the corner of my eyes, I saw Jasper kiss Alice who was scolding at me.

"I knew he'd find some way to be part of your little fight, but I had hoped you wouldn't give him a direct gateway!" she snorted. Strange – her voice even sounded beautiful when snorting.

I smiled at her and hugged her. "I promise, I'll kick him right out of it when I've learned how to kick Emmet's butt!"

"I'm going to have to hold you to your word!" she told me.

"I thought you were on my side," Emmet boomed, suddenly behind us. He was ridiculously quiet for a giant. I saw he was staring boringly at Jasper.

I grinned at him, and he turned to stare at me. As always, there was that hint of humor in his eyes. "I got to him first!"

He shrugged, and then laughed. "Well, now it may actually be _fun_ to kick your ass."

I rolled my eyes, forcing myself to stay light. I was suddenly aware that he expected me to burst into a hot fire of anger, and I was amused that he must find it annoying that I was so under control.

"Y'know, Emmet, I think we should go watch some baseball. Quality time with an elder brother and all that," I suggested.

"Why?" he asked, his eyes narrowing.

I laid my arm around his shoulders. "Because I think I want to share one of your last happy moments before I beat you."

"You wish," he grinned.

"I do, and luckily, I'm mythical, and mythical creatures very often get their wishes fulfilled."

He fizzled my hair and reminded me that he was mythical, too, and that he wished to make me more embarrassed than ever. I didn't know what he would do, but with Edward's growl in the background, I could quickly see that I didn't want to lose again.


	7. Dear Readers

Dear readers of Twilight After Dawn Winternight – or just Winternight.

I thought it was time to make announcement about this fanfic's future.

I _will_ finish it – that far I have planned. It is just impossible for me to write _two_ big fanfics – both Winternight and Newborn. So after I've finished Newborn, I will write Winternight, and then I'll write the sequel to Newborn.

Winternight will also be renamed to _Solstice_.

That was all for now.

I hope you aren't angry with me, and I hope you will stay tuned, because more will come once I finish Newborn.

Love

Dawn


	8. Chapter 7

I got a message from a one of this fanfics readers, telling me that I didn't do a good enough job with this, and indeed, I do not. I'm very sorry, but I'll post this chapter, then, and I hope you can forgive me for not being very active with this story. But, well, we've reached the turning point! This is where the story becomes interesting and gets a plot! Wuhuhu!

---

7. Hobby

"What's up with the commercials?" Emmett growled from downstairs.

I was sitting in Edward's lab, curled against his chest with his arms around me. Renesmee was playing on the floor, and we were listening to Debussy.

I lifted my head when I heard Emmett. He'd been awfully loud in the last time, probably because I'd been very in control of myself. I just didn't see any reason to fight him anymore, when the final battle would soon come. I would finally make all Emmett's annoying comments stop.

Jasper and I trained in a clearing, not far from the house. I quickly found out that what I had learned for the battle we'd expected with the Volturi was not enough. Back then it might have been – because I was ridiculously much in control of myself for a newborn, and because I was stronger than any other vampires at that time.

But I wasn't any longer.

I sighed and laid my head back against Edward's chest, listening to his breathing in and out. The sound was so calming.

Edward didn't like that I was preparing for a big fight with Emmett – neither did any of the others in the house, except for Jasper and Emmett. They were just as excited as I was.

It was strange to feel that I could be excited about such a thing. I could remember from my human time – and this was a clearer memory, because it was one I had shared with Edward, and I had been focusing very clearly on remembering memories with Edward – that I hadn't understood when the others were excited about fighting. Now I understood that this was just an instinct. Like running. Confidence was no problem anymore.

I smiled.

Edward's finger touched my lip, and I looked up at him. I smiled wider, and he smiled back at me. The face of an angel, truly.

"So beautiful," he murmured and sighed. He was just about to kiss me when Renesmee showed up in our arms. She had grown, and I feared we might have to pull her out of class. She liked class. She had a few friends there, though not too close.

Renesmee touched my cheek, and I smiled. She agreed with Edward, it seemed.

"You're beautiful, too," I laughed. She touched my cheek. She liked my laughter. So I laughed again.

"I like it, too," Edward announced and held me tightly.

We sat there for a moment. I always felt complete when I was with them like this. Then Rosalie called from downstairs. She wanted Renesmee.

Edward rolled his eyes. "She and Alice are ready for a new fashion show."

I smiled. Renesmee liked to be dressed up. Alice.

"Well, then let's go!" I said and jumped up with Renesmee in my arms. Edward was right behind us.

When we came down, Emmett sent me a sour glance. I couldn't help smiling. I was much more in control of myself now. I wondered why, but I had a theory it might have something to do with that I was finally settling with the thought of living in a new place.

Esme came down and watched the show with us. It was amazing to see how Renesmee danced around in the clothes, so thrilled it made my heart feel light.

"Nice," Jacob said when Renesmee sat in my lab when they were finished. "She could be a model."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't hold your breath."

"What if she wants to?" he asked.

"I wouldn't deny her anything if I _could_. But she's still growing." My eyebrows pulled together. Edward said the humans didn't suspect anything yet, but he was always there when we dropped her off, listening to the human's thoughts.

Jacob shrugged. "When she gets older, then."

I ran my hand through Renesmee's hair. "Maybe. If she wants to."

-

"Bella," Edward whispered when we were in the forest later. I looked up at him. His eyes were tortured. I frowned.

"What is it, Edward?" I asked. I couldn't stand it when he looked like this.

"Will you promise me something?"

I kissed his jaw. "Anything," I mumbled.

He laid his arms around me. I felt hesitation in his motions.

"Edward, seriously, what is it? You're scaring me here."

He sighed. "I'm just so … Worried. Your training with Jasper has made you better in fighting. Much better. But I still don't think you could beat Emmett."

I stared at him, a bit angry. Of course I was going to beat Emmett. That was the whole meaning with training. "And?"

"And I was hoping you would promise me not to challenge him."

My eyes widened. "_What_?" I gasped. "Why?"

"Well, I've seen it before. Emmett gets so into a fight that he forgets he's fighting a friend. A brother. Or sister."

"What are you saying? Emmett hasn't lost it with me yet," I commented.

"But he will, Bella. Now that you're getting better at fighting." He sighed. "When it was settled that you would be changed, I hoped that the fighting instincts wouldn't be too potent with you. And you're good at keeping them down, but apparently … Well, I guess all the times you've had to sit behind and watch the fight as human has made you eager to fight. Eager to prove something." He frowned. His eyes were black. "I don't want you to prove anything. You don't _need_ to prove anything."

I shook my head. "So what you're saying is that … He'll hurt me when I'm _good_ at fighting?"

"Yes, Bella. When he's got a real challenge, he forgets everything else; he's just focusing on the fight. He could hurt you, Bella." Pure grief was swelling in his eyes, and I had to look down.

"He hasn't hurt you or Jasper," I pointed out.

"For one reason; Esme stops us whenever it gets too close. In any case, one of Jasper's bites actually is made by Emmett …"

My head snapped up, and I stared at him. "What?" I demanded. "Weren't you supposed to tell me that _before_ I got into the whole challenge thing?"

"I'm sorry, Bella." He touched my cheek and watched me carefully. "So sorry. I hoped Emmett would let it go. I hoped he wouldn't wait till your newborn powers were used up. But he's smarter than he seems." He smiled weakly. I tried to smile back.

"Will you promise me not to fight him, then?" he whispered.

"No," I answered harshly.

"But why, Bella?"

"Because when I'm no longer a newborn, I'm useless! Emmett is strong, Alice sees the future, Rosalie tunes cars, Jasper with his calming-people-down thing, Esme holds us all in order, Carlisle's the doctor and our leader, and you're the mind reader. And I'm the useless!" I burst out.

He stared at me. Then his hands cupped under my cheeks, and he stared into my eyes. His was burning, as if somebody had set fire to the golden scotch color. "Bella, you're not useless! If it wasn't for you, half of us or everyone would have died when the Volturi came. You are our shield!"

"But it's not enough, Edward! I can't use the shield thing if there's no enemies!"

"Emmett can't use the full power of his strength if there's no enemies," he pointed out.

I scowled blackly at him. He smiled crookedly and touched my lower lip. "What's really wrong, Bella? You've been … Different in the last time. Something's bugging you."

I started to shake my head, but his hands cut it off. "You can't fool me, Bella!"

I sighed. Of course I couldn't. He knew me better than anyone else. Unfortunately right now.

"It's just … Now that we've moved, you and I kind of have to …" I grimaced. "Balance our free time. And in the night, Renesmee's sleeping, and I don't get that much time with her anymore because of school. It feels like I'm both loosing time with you and her, while I'm gaining a lot of free time that I don't know what to do with."

His eyes and mine were locked in each other. Then he smiled. "We don't _have_ to balance," he said and kissed my neck.

I laughed. "But what about days with lots of sunshine?"

"Just count them in," he laughed and kissed my lips eagerly.

I laughed around his lips. It was hard to be serious when he was like this. Especially when I was in the same mood.

"Edward," I said. "Seriously, I'm in a bit of a crisis here."

He pulled back and his head cocked to the one side. "Hmm … Rosalie suggested you could go with her in the garage. Why don't you do that the next time she's there? I know it might not be something for you, but … You can try."

I grimaced. "I don't think Rosalie would like that. She just did that to be polite."

He shook his head. "No, Bella. Rosalie has a side of her that's deep with emotions. She's not all shallow. She has that one side of her, but it doesn't come forth very often, and she doesn't know it very well, though I think she wants to. And when she's with you … Bella, I think you in some ways bring that side forth in her. You and Renesmee. She wants to encounter that side of her, and if it's more potent when you're there, well …" He shrugged.

I stared at him. "Wow," was all I could respond.

He smiled. "So will you give up the whole Emmett deal?"

I frowned.

"If you _do_ beat him, he'll never stop to challenge you. Remember, being strong is _his_ thing," he said. I nodded.

"Fine," I sighed. "I'll _try_ not to challenge him."

"It's going well so far."

I smiled. "But I'm not giving up my fighting lessons. Not until I have another hobby, as least."

He nodded. "That sounds … Somewhat fair." He bend over me, his face inches from mine. "Now, that was kind of serious. You want to do something less serious?" he asked playfully and kissed me.

I smiled around his lips. "I'm surprised it took you so long to ask," I noted and kissed him back.

-

"What's going on?" I asked, staring at Jacob. High school had just ended, and now that we were back, I could smell something sour. It smelled both familiar and distant.

He turned to wave at me. "Hey Bells. I thought I might show Nessie one of the wonders of being human. Food!"

I went to the couch where Renesmee and he sat with boxes on the table – to be fair, Jacob had three. I looked at the inscriptions on them.

"Chinese? I didn't know Indians liked that kind of stuff."

Renesmee sprang up from the couch to hug me and then run back to the boxes with food.

"She likes it?" I asked Jacob.

"She _loves_ it," he answered, grinning.

"Ew, what's that smell?" Rose muttered behind us. She came to the couch and sat beside Renesmee. "What's this? Is this one of your trigs, dog?" She looked blackly at Jacob, who grinned widely back.

"What trigs?" he asked innocently.

The innocence in his voice was too potent. It was too … Fake.

I turned toward him. "Jacob Black, what have you done?" I shouted. He stared at me.

"What? Nothing! I've just given her Chinese food."

"Moron," I muttered.

"Sure, sure," he said, patting Renesmee's hair.

I looked at my daughter. How old did she look now? Seven? Of course the humans hadn't noticed. But what when she looked eight? Nine? They would notice her growth. She would have to be taught home.

I smiled when she looked up at me. No need for her to worry, too.

"Renesmee, do you want to go for a walk with daddy and me?" It was hard for me not to laugh when I talked about Edward to her. Calling Edward 'daddy' w_as_ a joke.

She jumped up, already running for the door.

"Hey, I'll come, too!" Jacob said, jumping to his feet.

I rolled my eyes. "Never a quiet moment?" I asked teasingly.

He grinned. "Never."

Alice and Rosalie decided to come with us, too. It felt nice when we were gathered like this. Before I met Edward, that part of my memories, however, was not so clear, because they didn't seem like a real part of my life; I hadn't had a big family. But it felt nice.

"It's going to be nice weather tomorrow," Alice announced.

"I'll take Nessie to school," Jacob suggested. There wasn't many sunny days at the moment, and until now, most of them had been in the weekend.

They continued to talk, but I didn't listen. What would I be doing in that sunny day? Edward would probably be playing or reading. He would say yes if I suggested other activities. But I couldn't do that. We had to do something else, too, or it would get a bit too cocky – though Rosalie and Emmett used a whole decade before they got to the point where they could think like that. And I wasn't sure if I was there, either. I didn't want to wait till it was night. I didn't want to ever stop. I didn't want to be away from him. I just wanted to be with him. I just wanted to run off into the forest right now with him, and –

I cut myself off. I'd promised Alice and the others. Edward and I could ask for a house for us, but I didn't want to be too far from Renesmee …

I sighed, and then felt Edward's eyes on me. I looked up to meet his gaze. Whatever he saw in my eyes made him smile. It was a bit sad, that smile. Maybe he saw the yearning in mine and felt the same way.

But we'd promised …

I wrapped my hand around his and soaked in a deep breath to steady myself. Nightfall couldn't come quick enough. It was like I was building up my lust for later, but I couldn't get everything out before the dawn.

"Momma, see!" Renesmee laughed, and I looked to my right in time to see her smack a snowball in Jacob's face. Jacob looked hilarious. I laughed and pointed at him.

"Ah, you think that was funny, did you?" he asked, and before I knew of it, I was behind Edward. When I peeked around his shoulder, I saw Jacob lying across the ground, shaking with laughter. I looked at Edward, who was cleaning his hair for snow, and I smiled.

"Thanks," I muttered. He smiled at me.

Then another snowball hit Jacob. He got up and looked confused around.

"Ha! Your eyes look like your mind is completely blank, you know that? Your face, too," I noted, grinning. He scowled at me.

"He always looks like that," Rosalie pointed out. I could guess who had thrown the ball.

"Enough," Alice laughed. "We don't want a fight."

"We don't?" Jacob asked, looking at Rosalie.

"Alice's just trying to spare you the humiliation. She can see who wins," Rosalie said, smiling triumphantly.

"Jacob, stop," I laughed, when he was about to pick up another ball of snow. I was at his side in an instant. "I'm sure Alice just doesn't want to ruin all the clothes." I could hear Alice sigh, and I could imagine her roll her eyes.

"I'm just saying one of us have to play Esme when the real one isn't around," she said. Then her eyes were like spears. "Though it _should_ be the one who actually _is_ a mother, but she's not so responsible."

Renesmee crawled up my bag from behind and touched my cheek. I smiled. Renesmee was glad I was who I was. I pulled her into my arms.

"I love you, too," I mumbled. I smiled apologetically at Alice. "Sorry."

"But now that you mention clothes, Bella," Alice said. "I think you should use some of the more fancy clothes I've picked out for you. My lesson in how to use your wardrobe apparently didn't help."

I grinned. "Nope."

"Dog!" Renesmee suddenly demanded. It was her keyword for Jacob to turn into a wolf. Jacob grinned and wandered off into the forest – to spare Alice's clothes – and came back a few moments later as a wolf with a huge, wolfy grin.

"Well, as least now he can't talk," Rosalie muttered. I grinned at her.

"That is fortunately," I commented.

Jacob rolled his eyes, and I let Renesmee crawl up on his bag. Then Jacob ran off in front of us, his tale swinging from side to side. I couldn't help smiling widely.

"Hey, Bella, it's soon the sixteenth September," Alice said, dancing to my side. "I was thinking about throwing a big party this year, and –"

"Alice," I cut her off. "I don't even want to hear it! It'll give me headache. Birthdays are _your_ business."

She rolled her eyes. "And you're sure you don't even want to get a little bit involved?" she asked.

"Yes!"

She shook her head. "You're impossible."

I grinned. "I know."

Alice and Rosalie ran for the others, but Edward and I kept walking. I was very aware of the fact that I wanted, and he wanted, to be closer than just holding hands, but there wasn't going to be any of that.

"You want to catch up with the others?" he asked.

"No," I answered simply.

"So what are you going to do tomorrow?"

"You'll be playing, right?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Dang it," I said, unable to stop myself.

He laughed and played with a stray of my hair. "It _can_, of course, be rearranged," he announced.

I grinned at him. "That sounds very nice."

He shook his head. "Weren't you going to help Rosalie in the garage?"

"She's going to be there?"

"Looks like it."

"Well, then I guess …" I hesitated. I didn't quite believe what he'd told me about Rosalie. "I'll be there."

He smiled at the tone in my voice. "Don't be sad."

I smiled. "Well, if tomorrow can be rearranged, today can, too." I looked for the others. They had already disappeared. "We'll catch up with them later." He raised one eyebrow, and I smiled. Then I launched myself at him, meaning to hold him to the ground, but he was quicker. He caught my arms and turned us in the air, so that I hit the ground first. I scowled at him. "Not fair."

"You really don't have a say," he laughed and kissed me.

We didn't have a lot of time, but I was happier when we caught up with the others. They didn't say anything, and that made me smile. If Emmett had been there, I'd never have taken the risk.

"Alice," I said, suddenly eager. She tugged her head toward me.

"Yes?"

"When will it be thunder?" I asked. I had only played baseball a few times, but it was a whole different matter when you were a vampire.

Her eyes went blank, and then she focused on me. "Maybe, and I'm saying _maybe_, next week."

I smiled. "Excellent."

"Oh," Alice suddenly said, and then smiled. "It's going to be perfect." Her smile turned smug.

"What?" Rosalie asked.

"Tanya, Kate, Garrett, Carmen and Eleazar are all coming to visit next week, too!" she said.

"Great," I said. It was all but two years since we'd seen them – except for once, and that didn't count, because that was only a short hello and it was only Carmen and Eleazar – and I'd feared they were harder hurt than first assumed. Since revenge was a strong emotion among our kind, we had all feared that they would try to avenge on the Volturi.

"That's on time," Rosalie said. "I was starting to worry."

"We all were," Edward noted.

"Should we get back before Emmett ruins the house in frustration?" I asked. "The others would like to know that we'll soon get visitors."

Jacob sniffed in agreement, and we ran back to the house.

"Carlisle! Carlisle!" Alice sang when she ran in as the first, and I followed quickly. Jacob was the last one to be in the house again, only wearing pants.

"What's wrong, Alice?" Esme asked when she and Carlisle came down the stairs.

"Nothing's wrong! Everything's excellent!"

"The Denali clan is coming," I cut in, smiling hugely when Alice stared angrily at me.

"You did that on purpose!" she snapped.

"I did."

"What's the whole meaning with being a sidekick, if others tell what you see?"

I laughed. "Sorry, Alice, you were just so long about it."

She sniffed and pretended to be angry until I came over and laid my arms around her.

"Don't be mad at me, sis," I begged.

She turned to smile at me. "Ah, okay, for this one time." Then she danced over to Jasper, where she was embraced by a pair of strong arms that wrapped themselves around her.

"When?" Carlisle asked when we were finished.

"About one week from now," Alice said.

"Can you see how long time they'll stay?" Esme asked in her silent voice.

Alice shook her head. "No, but I guess a while. They're not entirely sure themselves."

"Well, it's nice they've finally somewhat pulled themselves together," Esme sighed.

"Yea, it's been a real pain worrying about them," Emmett announced.

"Sure," I said, rolling my eyes. "_You've_ been worrying."

He sent me a scornful look.

"Oh, Carlisle, tomorrow will be good weather," Alice noted, and Carlisle nodded.

"Well, I'll go to the office and get some work done before, then."

"So, Bella," Emmett said, smiling innocently at me. "What are _you_ going to be doing tomorrow?"

I smiled right back. "Not fighting with you, I guess."

"Aren't Jasper's training doing any good?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Ask Jasper."

Emmett growled. "She's no fun anymore! Renesmee!" He turned to Renesmee, and for a flicker of a second, I feared she would be his new victim. "Your mother is _boring_!"

She frowned at him, clearly disagreeing. She ran to Edward, who held out his arms for her. When she patted his cheek, he was already halfway to doing what she wanted him to do. He went for the piano, and my lullaby soon hummed through the room. I smiled and went to stand by their sides.

-

"Wow, Bella, you're shaking!" Jasper said.

I send him a sour glance. As Jacob drove out from the parking lot with Renesmee, I felt a huge, empty space in my chest – like I always did when it was sunny on every-days, and I had nothing to do, because Renesmee was in school. But this time was worse. I was going to spend the day with Rosalie.

Edward sat at the piano, playing my lullaby to calm me. What was the big freaking deal? So what I was going to be in the garage with Rosalie? She was the one to suggest it in the first place!

I sucked in a deep breath and steadied myself. Then I went to the garage.

I knocked once before entering. Rosalie looked up at me, her eyes shining in the dim light.

"Hey. I wondered if you'd object if I stay with you today," I said.

She smiled. "Sure. I was going to ask if Emmett would help me lift the car, but now that you're here, you can help me."

I smiled back and went to sit beside her. She showed me what to do, and then I lifted the car up. It was Edward's Volvo.

She disappeared under the car and asked me for a lot of strange tools that I had never heard of before. She explained to me what they looked like, and the first time went on like that.

"Emmett's not happy with you," she suddenly noted from under the car.

I smiled. "Emmett's not happy with _anybody_ if they don't make a complete fool out of themselves," I said.

She chuckled. "That might be, but still. He hates that you're preparing to beat him, but he doesn't get to fight until then." Her head was suddenly there, staring at me. "He'd be better off if you just let it go."

"I wouldn't. He'd just make more inappropriate jokes."

She grinned. "They'd stop. Eventually." I rolled my eyes as she went under the car again.

"In any case, I've promised Edward I'll try not to let my temper get me," I muttered.

"Emmett's going to be very disappointed. And angry, though mostly at Edward."

I smiled and looked at the next tool. What was that? I decided not to writhe my brain around it and gave it to her.

"Y'know, it's strange that you have an amazing self control when it comes to humans, but when it comes to other vampires – "

"Emmett," I quickly corrected.

She laughed dazzlingly. "Yea, when it comes to Emmett, you can't help yourself."

"Amazing," I muttered. "It's kind of annoying, too."

"I bet it is. Getting your hair messed up like that all the time."

I rolled my eyes. "Of course _you_ would think of that."

She didn't laugh. She just held out her hand for the next tool. I wondered what I'd said to offend her. I didn't want to make her angry at me again. It had taken me this long to win her over. I couldn't do that all over again.

"Rose," I said.

"Hmm?" she asked.

"Why do you use tools and not just your hands?" I asked, choosing another question.

"Just to be sure not to break anything." Her eyes were suddenly there, staring at me. "What was the real question?"

I laughed. "What question?"

"Ah, come on, Isabella!"

I sighed. "Well, I just wondered … Do you like having me here? As a sister and all that?"

She was on her way back in, but she stopped to look at me. "I like having you in the family, Bella. I also did before, though that was just because of Edward. I'm sorry I've been so … Off beam toward you before, but … Well, I like having you as a sister, because you …" She shrugged. "You complete the family. You always did. I just didn't see it then. Or didn't want to."

"But you didn't like me because of what I chose. Do you still hate me for that?" I asked in a little voice.

It surprised me that she laughed. "You made the right chose, Bella! You chose to give us Nessie."

I smiled weakly. "But I still chose to be immortal."

"You didn't have a choice," she stated.

"If I hadn't gotten pregnant with Renesmee … If I had been an immortal without being … In danger like that … Would you hate me?" I whispered.

She seemed to think about it. "I don't know. All I know is how I reacted to what happened. I don't know how I would have reacted to anything else. But …" She hesitated. "Well, I would probably have hated you in the beginning. It would fade, though, I'm sure."

"Yea," I agreed, not entirely believing it. Then I smiled. "But now it's Jacob that's lying under the rage of yours?" I asked.

"He deserves that. Stupid dog," she muttered.

I laughed. "He's Jacob. Of course he does." The silence dragged on for a little while longer. "Umm, Rosalie? What is it exactly you're doing?"

I didn't understand a thing of what she said from then, but I was happy. Happy to spend my day with Rosalie, my sister.

-

"Bella, you have to focus!" Jasper said when he, for the who-knows-what time, held my arms in a secure grip, clearly superior, winning again.

I sighed. "Sorry, Jazz."

We were in the little clearing, all alone. Alice didn't come because she could see that everything would be okay, and Edward didn't come because Alice could see that nothing would be okay if he did. He couldn't stand to watch Jasper and me fight, so he stayed away. I always had to promise him that nothing would happen, and he made me feel all woozy after he'd stared into my eyes to secure my words.

He smiled encouragingly. "Try again."

We continued to fight. I tried to take in everything he did, but even with my super-senses, it was hard. He taught me all kinds of tactics.

"You know what would be kind of cool?" I asked him, grinning at the thought.

"What?" he asked curiously.

"Doing karate," I said, making a ninja-sound and then laughed.

He grinned. "You have lots of time. With eternity before you, I'm sure you're going to need everything you ever learn on any subject."

I nodded, and then launched myself at him again.

Right then, the little body flew into the clearing, and we stopped to look at her. Alice danced toward us, smiling. "They took off an hour ago," she said. "The Denali clan. You should come back so you can greet them when they come."

We ran back with her. The others were making ready for their arrival. Renesmee was in Jacobs arms, ecstatic. She waved at me when we walked in, and I waved back.

I went to the couch where I stood beside Esme, waiting for Tanya's coven to come. Esme lightly touched my hair, pulling something – probably snow – out of it. I smiled at her, and she patted my shoulder.

"I can hear them," Edward announced. He'd been sitting at the piano, but he now sprang to my side, wrapping an arm around me.

Renesmee was too hyper to stay in Jacob's arms, and she jumped to the ground, smiling hugely.

"Come in," Edward called before anyone even touched the door.

Tanya walked in as the first one. She smiled when she saw us all gathered there. "New house, you say? Doesn't it look kind of like the other one?" she asked.

"We like familiarity," I said.

"Tanya!" Renesmee called, and Tanya looked down to smile at Renesmee, who now held out her arms to encounter Tanya.

"Hello, Nessie," Tanya laughed.

Renesmee patted her cheek. Tanya's face grew a bit sad and tight. "No, we know better than that."

I could imagine what Renesmee was telling her. All our worrying about them and the Volturi.

Kate, Garrett, Carmen and Eleazar were there, now, and we greeted them.

"How's it going with the shield?" Kate asked me, grinning.

I smiled. "It's going just fine. Thanks again for your help."

She laughed. "My pleasure." She winked at Edward and turned to greet Esme.

"It's nice to see you two again," Garrett greeted us.

"How's it going in Alaska?" I asked.

"It's great," he answered, but his following smile was a bit tight.

"What about the diet?" Edward asked. Then it wasn't that Garrett had been grimacing about. Then what was it?

"It's not as hard as I'd imagined," he answered. "And it's … Easier, somehow." He shrugged and went on to Esme.

"Hey, you," Tanya said and hugged Edward and me on turn. "Your little she-devil here got to me." She pointed at Renesmee with a smile. Renesmee's hand was wrapped in Tanya's hair, and she was clearly consumed by the color.

"Nessie, if you have to bug anyone, bug Jacob," Rosalie said. "No one cares if you do anyway."

"Isn't that a bit harsh?" Tanya asked, smiling. She tried to put Renesmee back to the ground, but Renesmee was stubborn and held the hair tight. I smiled and wondered deliberately where she got it from.

"No, she bites him all the time without anyone objecting," Rosalie said, hugging Tanya. "We were worried."

"Nessie told me that." Tanya grimaced, and the sad look was back in her eyes. "But we're not stupid enough to try. You talked some sense into us."

I rubbed her bag. "So what _have_ you been doing the last years?" I asked.

She smiled harshly. "Fighting the grief. Carmen and Eleazar got to the surface before Kate and I, and they didn't want to drown in the mourning again, so they shortly left. I'm just happy that Kate had Garrett. That helped her, and that helped me. Hi Carlisle!"

She went off to greet the others. I felt strangely happy and relieved to see them. They were like extended family – even I, who hadn't been in the family for quite that long, could feel it.

As Alice had predicted, they didn't know how long they were going to stay – which was just fine with everybody.

"So, Bella," Kate said. "I'm surprised you let Nessie go to school. Last time I saw you, you so rarely let her get away from your arms." She grinned at me, and I stuck my tongue out at her. I wasn't going to answer.

"Well, unfortunately, Nessie still grows. The humans will soon notice," Carlisle noted, and his brows furrowed. Renesmee was outside playing with Jacob. Carlisle wouldn't say this in front of her. She should enjoy what she had while it was and not fear what would come. I knew that it was best that way. I was always stuck with being dead scared of losing my moon and my stars and my heaven that was my family.

"That's too bad," Kate replied. "She must love being able to go outside without sparkling like a diamond."

"Actually, she's rather jealous of us who does sparkle like diamonds," Edward said.

"Huh," was all Kate could say. I smiled at her, but inside, I felt torn. Should I be happy to soon have Renesmee constantly home again, or should I be sad on her behalf?

"Momma, momma!" Renesmee cried from outside, and in a second I was out of the house. My eyes were wide, searching for what'd made her scream for me.

And there it was.

Big and dark and shaggy and retarded and Jacob. He'd caught her arms on her back so she couldn't throw the snowball she held in her hands.

I calmly walked toward him, grabbed his hand and writhed it away from her. As soon as she was free, Renesmee send the ball flying toward Jacob. He scowled at me.

I turned to go away, but then I glanced back at him. "If you do anything like that again, I'll break your hand so that I'm sure you won't."

He rolled his eyes, but he knew I was serious. Renesmee laughed and send a snow ball flying toward his face. He didn't move but let it smash into his shaggy hair.

-

The Denalis stayed long enough to see Renesmee be pulled out of school. It happened a cloudy day, when Edward heard the teacher note how Renesmee was smarter and taller than all the other kids. Renesmee stopped coming to school after that.

Renesmee was very sad, and she tugged her head in my hair while Carlisle explained exactly why Renesmee one day just stopped coming to school.

I kissed her cheek and tried to smile at her. "Don't worry. There's always high school," I mumbled. She tried to smile back at me, but she didn't succeed.

Jacob and Esme would teach Renesmee from now on. Alice hid the school uniform, and Renesmee looked with big eyes as this happened. It looked as if she would cry, and Edward started to hum her lullaby. He embraced her in a warm hug, and when I saw Renesmee's face again, she smiled a little.

"Cheer up, Nessie!" Jacob grinned. "I'll be here." She laughed and climbed into his lab. It was only then I noticed that she'd grown. It was a little sad that she wasn't a handy size anymore. I wished she'd been smaller for just a little longer …

"Aw, Nessie, jeez!" Jacob gasped, and both Edward and I laughed when Renesmee grabbed his hair and started to pull him along.

Tanya and Rosalie, who just entered the room, laughed with us. I believed Rosalie looked a little rueful.

-

"Bella!"Alice called, dancing down the stairs. I turned to look at her. "Atlantic city!"

I stared at her for a second, not getting her point. "Atlantic city?" I asked.

"Yes!" Alice exclaimed.

"Alice thinks we need more money," Edward told me from the piano, and from the corner of my eye, I saw him rolling his eyes, "so we're apparently going to make some."

"I feel … Intimidated," I pondered.

"That's a very good idea," Edward answered.

"Oh, Edward, stop it! Bella needs to come with me to Atlantic City!" Alice growled.

"Why is that exactly?" I asked.

Alice took my hand and looked sadly at me. "We never do stuff together anymore," she whispered and looked at me through her lashes with dark eyes.

"Ugh, okay, Alice," I mumbled, but I knew what she meant. "When are we going?"

"Tomorrow. Just you, me, Jasper and Edward," she answered.

My eyes widened. "But what about Re –"

"Renesmee will be with the others, safer than ever," Alice promised. I felt the corners of my mouth turn down, but she poked the sides of my lips till I was forced to smile. Alice danced to the kitchen where I knew Esme was doing something with flowers.

I looked over my shoulder at Edward. He looked up at me and smiled.

"You knew!" I muttered and laid my arms across my chest.

He shrugged. "It'll be good for you. For both of us. Come." He stood and held out his arms. I was with him in an instant, clutching myself to him. "Let's go find Renesmee," he suggested gently. And so we did.

-

"We're here!" Alice exclaimed as she jumped out of the car.

I smiled. I had to admit, it was nice to be away from Emmett's constant jokes. And maybe it was good that Edward and I got to be just us, not parenting.

Jasper and Edward took care of everything while Alice and I stood in the background and waited. I felt a bit high on all the glances I was getting. I would have to make sure it wasn't getting to my head.

"This way," Jasper said and led us up to a luxurious room. Edward and I would be staying there, and Jasper and Alice lived a bit down the hallway.

"We'll meet in the great hall at eight. Then we'll find a good place to gamble!" Alice announced, looking piercingly at both Edward and I.

"Alice, I can't – "

"Shh," Alice cut in. "I'll teach you. See ya!" Then she and Jasper disappeared down the hall.

"Don't worry," Edward whispered in my ear. "She won't bother you." I could hear the tightness in his voice, as there always was when he felt like protecting me.

"No, it's okay, Edward." I smiled at him and then opened the door. "Let's get some sleep." I smiled teasingly at him, and he smiled my favorite crooked smile before quickly sweeping me into his arms.

-

I loved Atlantic City, and being with Edward, Jasper and Alice alone was something I loved even greater. I knew Renesmee was safe, and I got to be alone with Edward.

Everything was bright. Everything was great.

And when we returned home, we was even more unnecessarily rich than before.

-

I was standing at the edge of the room, leaning against the wall. I was watching my whole family; Denalis and Cullens. I loved my family. If I lost just one of them, it would hurt, even if I didn't lose them to death.

Renesmee, in the middle of everyone, laughed and grinned and grabbed for everyone's hands and cheeks. It was overwhelming how I was surrounded by all that love. And then it hit me.

I smiled as I sneaked out of the room – though Edward and Alice surely noticed – and ran to the garage where I got into my car.

I drove down to the city where I got the the nearest bookstore. There was no need to get the really expensive stuff just yet. It was just for trial. And bookstores sometimes had what I was looking for.

Back at the house my family were still gathered in the living room, and I placed myself in a corner. I sat still for a few moments so that they wouldn't notice, and then I captured the picture in front of me with my mind.

And then I took forth the pen and the professional drawing paper that I'd bought, and as I placed the pen on the paper, I knew it would be a masterpiece. Because it was my family, and I loved them.

And we would be together forever. I wouldn't let anything come between us.

-

The next chapter is going to be a leap in time, which means something like twenty or thirty years in the future.

Please review

Lythya


	9. Chapter 8

Winternight

Second part

A GAME IS NOTHING WITHOUT PLAYERS

It was one of those days. One of the sunny one's that didn't accept our presence anywhere but on our own grounds. Once again I felt imprisoned, but even worse, I felt that Renesmee was being imprisoned with me for no reason.

Renesmee didn't have to fear the sun, she didn't have to flee if it shot through the clouds, and she didn't have to look for exactly that to happen at any moment.

I had to admit, if we didn't have Alice, our lifestyle would be all the more tough. I hadn't realized that as a human, and I was shaken by the thought of how my family had gone by before Alice came along.

Alice could simply predict the weather, and that was that. She'd predicted this day for a long time, but now we could all see it happening; the clouds were shifting to give room for a rare, sunny day.

And the imprisonment began.

I probably wouldn't think of it that way, if it wasn't for Renesmee. In truth, having already completed High School four times and beginning all over felt like a prison in itself, but when Renesmee stayed behind, simply because it would look suspicious if only she and Jacob went to school, it hurt, because unlike us, she could take the chance and befriend a few humans for the short time we were staying. And she liked those humans. I liked them, too, in the brief moments I'd encountered them. Jacob liked them, too.

Jacob made the sunny days easier to take, in a way, when it came to Renesmee. Even though he liked their friends, he hated having to repeat high school, and he loved the free time to have fun with Renesmee.

I hated to think of them as a couple, but I also thought that there was no one better for her – if there was, I'd go right out to find it.

I kind of understood why my family had been worried when Edward first started seeing me. I was human, I was outside. It was sort of the same business with Jacob. Even worse, maybe.

Because he was a werewolf.

But then again, Renesmee was, how much any of us hated to think of it, a bit of an outsider, too. She was immortal as all of us, but she didn't have our eyes, and she wasn't as strong in our vampire traits.

So maybe it was good that she had Jacob.

I sighed and drew the first line over the paper. The sun added such a lovely dimension to the landscape.

We had all expected it. The day when they became a couple. For a long time, Jacob had merely been an extra brother for Renesmee, but of course, things couldn't stay that way. Just like Edward and I hadn't been able to stay friends so many years ago.

Because such a bond of affection cannot be fought. Not even by **NAME**, who was one of the Volturi's vampires, who possessed the power to change ties. She could strengthen them or weaken them, but ties as strong as those between mates were untouchable.

I continued drawing at human pace, watching the sun break through even more, and I knew my skin was starting to shimmer.

When I looked up from the paper again, I saw Renesmee and Jacob break through the edge of the forest. Their figures were just shades now, but they were moving fast.

On a whim, my hand moved even faster and painted them into my drawing as if a camera had taken it. No, it was more alive than that. A camera didn't catch the essence of things. Not the way Renesmee's hair was wavering in the air, not the way their hands were intertwined.

I watched them as they came closer. They'd been hunting.

Even though Renesmee could eat any kind of food she craved, she stuck with animal blood, even though it wasn't exactly the best and most delicate food. We could get food brought in for her, food so delicate, that she'd be in heaven when she tasted them.

But she stuck with animal blood.

She'd told me once, that she didn't want to be too different from the others, that she didn't want to drift away from us.

I'd held her in my arms and told her, that she would never drift away from us, those who loved her. And I'd remembered my first arm wrestling with Emmett, back when I was a newborn. She had only been able to smolder a stone, and I'd had to break it for her. It was undeniably small things like that that made her think she was drifting away from us.

"Drawing the landscape again?" Jacob asked when they came up to us. "Sure you don't want to draw something more creative?"

My mind was blank and I was still staring at the point where they'd been three minutes ago.

Then I blinked and turned my eyes at him, not sure what to say.

Undoubtedly, he must find the situation a bit awkward. I could see it on his face.

And I burst into laughter.

"_What_?" Jacob asked.

Renesmee was smiling, knowing instantly why I was laughing, and she gave out a little chuckled. It reminded me of her father's.

"_What is it_?" Jacob repeated furiously.

Edward was with us before I could even respond, and he raised an eyebrow at me, smiling a crooked smile.

I concentrated and withdrew my shield. It was still hard to withdraw it, but I was getting better at it.

When Edward had found out what had us laughing, he grinned himself.

"He sure does look like a moron," he agreed and sat down beside me, taking my hand in his.

"Hey!" Jacob shouted.

Renesmee giggled.

"Jacob's a moron." She sounded as if it was at the same time something everyone knew, but also like something she couldn't quite understand.

Jacob's expression changed instantly, and he looked at her with those eyes that were just for her. It was probably those eyes that made me accept his love for her and all that relationship-thingy they had going on.

I smiled. "Known knowledge to everyone, right?"

Edward crossed his legs and put his arm around my waist, looking at my just-started drawing with a raised eyebrow, and I leaned in to kiss it before he could ask.

I smiled at Renesmee. "Are you sure you don't want to go to school?" I asked.

She nodded, looking seriously at me. I knew it was again that drifting away thing. If she really wanted to go to school, nobody would deny her that.

"Nessie!" Alice called. I turned to see her and Rosalie standing expectantly at the door. "Laura Decrôir just made her new collection official! You'll love it! It's so beautiful!"

"Alice is already thinking about buying half of all the clothes," Rosalie laughed.

"Bella, you come, too! I have found the perfect dress for you!" Alice announced solemnly.

I smiled and looked at the landscape. "I'll come in ten minutes. I just have to finish my sketch."

"Jeez, Bella, if it takes so long, why don't you go ahead and study art?"

I saw Renesmee looked mischievously at Alice. In her eyes, Alice's words sounded like an insult. Renesmee knew how much it meant to me to give my drawings the proper time.

"I finished literature last year, I think I'll wait with taking the university again till we've finished here," I answered.

Alice rolled her eyes. "You're so strange, Bella"

I grinned.

"I know."

"Come on, Nessie. Your mother's being troublesome again," she teased reaching out for Renesmee's hand. Renesmee gave her it, and they went inside in a dance that would make the eyes pop out of any human male.

I peeked at Jacob. Here was the proof.

"Aren't you going with them?" Edward asked. I heard the teasing in his voice, even though it was concealed well.

"Watching some designer's new clothes aren't exactly my top priority," he answered and nodded in my direction. "I'm on Bella's side, and I'm going to do exactly like her. I'm going to take my time."

He sat down beside us, and I snickered. Of course _he'd_ know I wouldn't take ten minutes about drawing up the sketch. I'd take the time it took for Alice to give up on that dress-thingy.

"You're giving yourself quite the reputation," Jacob noted, dashing at my knee. "The vampire who never keeps a promise, eh? Now _that's_ a new one. Never expected a bloodsucker to be _that_."

"Somehow you don't seem very surprised," I said sullenly.

He grinned his most Jacoby grin, and Edward flicked a fist at his cheek, which to a human would look like a fatal hit, but to a vampire looked like a friendly dash.

Jacob flicked his own fist at Edward, and they were soon at somewhat of a sitting fist-fight.

I never would have dreamed of them having such a relationship.

I turned the page with the sketch of Renesmee and Jacob and peeked at Edward and Jacob to draw a quick sketch of them. I was, apparently, in somewhat of a sketch-mood.

"Yuck, Bella!" Jacob groaned through Edward's hand, that covered half his face. "Can't we do something just a little bit out of order without you having to captivate it?"

I felt my eyes shoot lightning at him, and I clawed my fingers around the paper. There was almost no sound as I rolled it together and shot it at his face.

I stood up with my sketch book and pencils and walked a good twenty meters away.

"Moron," I muttered under my breath and continued drawing on my original work, although I was now seeing it from a slightly different angle.

"Aw, come on, Bella!" he said. "Argh!"

Edward planted his final blow in his guts and then in a cat-like movement came to sit by my side in a matter of one second. We didn't touch, but there was always that electricity between us that would never disappear, and I could feel it just as strongly as the ground I was sitting on.

Jacob made an annoyed sound and went inside, sensing I wasn't in the mood for his goofing.

"Is something the matter?" Edward asked me, his eyes hanging at me with a serious gaze that made my skin tinkle.

"It's just that sometimes, I don't think of Jacob as Jacob but rather as 'son-in-law'. Ugh." I sighed and shook my head. "How long do you think it'll take before he gets that ring on her finger?"

He smiled at me with that crooked smile that would never fail to astonish me.

"I'm actually quite surprised that he hasn't done anything about the matter yet, but maybe it's because Nessie doesn't seem quite as if she's at that point yet. Though I _am_ disappointed in him for not at least _trying_," he told me.

"What do you mean she doesn't see, to be at that point yet?" I asked him, astonished.

"Well, she's not having those thoughts yet, at the least. But our daughter has many thoughts of traveling, and maybe Jacob can feel that. She wants to go see our Amazonian friends again," he told me.

I nodded, knowing this to be true. We'd only visited Zafrina and her coven once since the Volturi's almost-attack.

"So she's thinking about leaving us?" I murmured. I wasn't sure what I thought of the idea. It wasn't like I hadn't known of her lust for adventure. I didn't need Edward's power for that.

"You know it's not like that," Edward murmured back, and I smiled.

"She belongs with us," I whispered.

"She knows that," he added with a nod. "We will always be her home, no matter how far we get from each other, no matter where we go to, we will always be her home. And she will always return to us."

I smiled and tilted my body to my left so I could put my head on his shoulder. "She's grown so much. Can you believe that it's thirty years since we were in that crisis? I sure looked like a mess back then." I coughed a laugh.

He smiled. "We all did. We were so worried," he whispered, and I could hear, that even though we'd gotten our beautiful daughter from it, even though I'd survived and become a vampire, even though we were happy now, he still felt angst when he thought of that time. He'd described it to me as the worst time of his life but one; when we were separated. It was a part of my own life that I didn't want to remember. When I had been human, even though I'd tried, I couldn't forget, but as a vampire I just had to try not to think of it. Eventually, it would fade into something I knew had happened, and that I knew the pain of, but that I still couldn't quite remember. It had already begun, the fading of those memories. I only remembered the happy moments, the memories I clang to, those of Edward and my parents.

But Edward couldn't do the same as me, for he was a vampire back then, and he couldn't just forget. It was forged into him; it was a part of who he was now. He could never forget. He could try, but he would not succeed.

"Thirty years," I breathed.

"Thirty wonderful years." He placed his head against mine. "You were so worried that we wouldn't get to be with her enough, that we'd look away one moment, and when we looked back, she'd be all grown up and ready to fly."

I frowned. "Normal parents gets eighteen years before their kid is grown up, we got seven years, but that doesn't really count, I mean, she could read when she was about three months old!"

He smiled. "But you're not unhappy about it, are you?"

"I'm not unhappy," I murmured. "The only thing I'm unhappy with is Jacob being such a jerk."

"Well aren't we all?" he laughed.

I smiled and decided that maybe I should take Jacob's words seriously and keep a promise now and then, so I gathered my drawing stuff, kissed Edward for a wonderful amount of time, and hurried back inside.

I dropped my sketchbook on one of the chairs in the living room. Emmett and Jasper, sitting in the couch, watching some game, didn't look up at me. Jacob, who had joined them, tried to ignore me, too, but he peeked up at me for a second, and then _I_ ignored _him_.

"Bella!" Alice shouted in excitement from the other end of the room. "Bella, you came!"

"Didn't I say that I would?" I pointed out putting my arm around her.

"Yea, but you don't always do." She made her voice sound hurt, and damn it, it worked.

I sighed. "Just show me the dress."

She grinned widely and put her fingers on the computer's keyboard. She wrote in some address and clicked a few times, before we got to a page with a silver-green dress that ended at the knees in the front, but continued to lean down in wave-like forms behind. It didn't have sleeves, but it held itself up with straps around the neck.

"Alice, why do you want to buy something so fancy? _When_ will we _ever_ need that?"

She pouted and sent me a sour look. "We have to use the money for something, so why not this?"

I shook my head and shrugged. "Fine. Buy it if it makes you happy."

She made a happy sound, and I knew that of course she'd already predicted this outcome. I didn't want to know when she expected me to be wearing it.

-

I didn't see my dad very often, and I never saw my mother. She'd have a stroke if we told her even the little we'd told Charlie.

So my mother thought I was dead. There had been no better solution. We'd looked for one for a long time, but finally, we gave in. I wouldn't ever talk with my mother again, though I _had_ once broken into her new house. I'd found the stuff that was mine which she had saved, and then I put a little note in one of the books like a bookmark. I couldn't write much, just that I loved her. I also wished to tell her that I was looking over her, but that would probably scare her.

But I knew that even getting to meet Charlie every now and then was ordinary, so I tried to be happy.

It wasn't very long since we last saw Charlie. He was really getting old, but I saw a fire in him that most old people didn't have.

He was with Sue now. She was good for him. They were good for each other.

Because so many ties had been made between the Cullen family and the wolf pack, the line wasn't very important anymore, especially since we didn't live in Forks anymore, we only owned the house for later measures.

So we somewhat were allowed to cross the line under certain circumstances. This meant, though, that we were not allowed to bring other vampires, and the wolves knew our scent, so they would know. But they trusted us, Edward said. They were only being precautious.

Renesmee had been to visit Emily and the other women, who had been imprinted on. I had visited Emily, too, and it was strange to me that she had changed so much. And unlike Jacob, the other wolves were aging. Seth looked older than me now!

Concerning Leah, she checked in with both the wolves and with Jacob every now and then. She hadn't aged quite as much as the others. She was on her own, but she did well. She'd become a doctor in a hospital in Chicago. She enjoyed helping people. This was also a reason she didn't hate us as much. Well, actually, she didn't hate _Carlisle_ so much anymore, which made Carlisle her almost-friend, since Carlisle was the one that was the hardest to hate.

Well except for my daughter, of course.

I knew that one day I wouldn't have anybody but my vampire family left, and I was starting to settle with that thought. Charlie was old, and even if he still had some life left in his limbs, he was retired and enjoying the last part of his life and his new hobby; reading. I never would have expected him to have that as a hobby, but it happened anyway.

He didn't miss anything in his life, so that was good. I didn't want him to miss anything, and I didn't want him to get involved in my world. He knew what he needed to know to stay in touch and nothing more. He didn't know the concrete word for what we were; he didn't know how different we were exactly.

But I felt that our relationship had never been damaged, actually, some things had changed for the batter; like he was no longer opposed to Edward the way he had been before. Actually, he was more against Jacob now. I mean, it was impossible not to see the connection between him and Renesmee.

I was looking forward to soon seeing Charlie again. We'd planned it weeks in advance, and I was walking around with a huge smile on my face constantly. It'd been almost half a year since I saw him last time.

"And he's going to be so happy!" I chimed to Alice as we watched Indiana Jones, one of Emmet's absolute favorites.

"Would you relax, Bella?" Emmett complained. "I'm trying to watch the movie."

"You've only watched it seventy hundred times," Rosalie noted.

"Argh, come on, not you, too!" he complained.

"You're a freakin' vampire," Jacob snorted. "Doesn't your mind work on a whole different plan? Don't you take several channels." He snickered.

"What, dog, are you trying to say something? Huh? 'Cause we can take it outside, y'know!" Emmett growled.

"While your precious film is running?" Jasper asked, acting overwhelmed. "You've gotta be kidding!"

"Okay, that's –" Emmett said between clenched teeth, but Esme suddenly stood in between them.

"Stop it now," she said in a calm, soothing, motherly voice. "Just sit down and watch the movie!"

I snorted. "Like Emmett would ever allow us to watch the movie in quiet!"

He turned his gaze toward me and was between me and Alice in an instance. I was already on my feet, grinning widely at him.

As I expected, Edward had risen from his seat immediately and had me pulled behind my back. I peeked out from him and stuck my tongue at him with a muffled laugh.

He growled. "Cheater."

I grinned at him. "Looser."

Edward sighed and pulled me down beside him by the waist. He raised his eyebrow at me and I looked apologetically at him.

"Sorry," I mouthed.

He rolled his eyes, sighed and then smiled at me with arms like golden scotch. I let myself get lost in them for a few seconds, before I turned my attention back to the movie. Indiana Jones was complaining about a snake – yet again – and Emmett was laughing.

"How can you laugh so much over something you've already watched a hundred times?" I asked Emmett.

He sighed. "Bella, it's a classic. I'm not expecting you to understand."

"Why can't we see new movies? Or at least something like Dracular, Buffy the Vampire or Underworld if we _have_ to see old movies."

"But they're all about vampires!" Emmett burst outraged.

I grinned. "Exactly."

"But they're so annoying! Making us seem like some weaklings that can't go out in the sun!"

"Emmett, we're not in school right now," I reminded him.

"Would you two just _stop_?" Alice asked. "You're ruining the karma!"

"Sorry, _Alice_, didn't mean to interrupt your _karma_!" Emmett snorted.

I chuckled and pulled my feet up on the couch and rolled myself into a ball so I could rest against Edward easier.

We watched the movie like that with the regular interruptions consisting of my family jabbing at each other.

But then something happened that changed the atmosphere from playful and teasing to serious and dangerous.

Jasper and I were the first ones to notice.

I felt Edward become a stone entirely. He didn't move, and when I looked at his face, it was as hard and cold as ice.

I guessed that there could only be one thing making him look like that in a situation like this, and that would be one of Alice's visions.

So I looked to her to find my sister just as frozen and icy as my brother, staring into the air, watching scenes I couldn't imagine.

Jasper held her hand with a worried expression on his face, as if he was in pain, too.

'Cause it was obvious that they were in pain. Whatever Alice was seeing was not a nice vision.

"What is it?" I asked cautiously, wondering if I even wanted to know.

If Edward had been human, his face would be even paler than it was now.

"What is it?" I repeated in a whisper.

Alice had curled herself up into a ball and rocked back and forth. Emmett and Rosalie were on the spring, waiting for an answer, and Esme and Carlisle had come in to the room. Carlisle grabbed Alice by the shoulders.

"What do you see, Alice? Is it bad?" he asked her.

But Alice didn't answer.

She turned to me and Edward and cried in a tearless sob: "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't know, I'm sorry! I didn't see, I … I didn't watch." She was rocking back and forth even harder, looking desperately at Edward, and I imagined that whatever she'd seen, she was afraid Edward would be furious with her for not already having seen it.

Fear built up inside me. Alice wouldn't expect Edward to be so furious if it didn't have something to do with the family. And since her eyes were still begging him, he had yet to decide exactly how furious he was.

"What is it?" I asked in something that sounded like a scream. I hadn't seen them like this since Alice found out the Volturi was attacking us. What was going on?!

"Alice," Renesmee cried, and her voice made me turn.

Renesmee had small, pearl tears in her eyes. We'd never known she could cry.

"Sweety," I whispered and got up to put my arms around her. She buried her face in my shoulder and grabbed my arms. Her hands were shaking. She'd never seen us this scared before. Not since we'd stood before the Volturi on the outskirts of Forks. Up until then we'd hidden everything from her as well as we could.

"Nessie, it's okay," Jacob murmured and patted her back. His eyes were soft till he turned his eyes on Alice and Edward. Then they were worried and angry. "What is it?" he asked in a harsh voice.

I turned my face toward them.

Both Edward and Alice were staring at me.

A ringing made everyone freeze. I realized it was my phone, but I didn't take it. I couldn't concentrate.

The ringing stopped only to begin anew from where Edward sat.

Carlisle reacted and grabbed it from Edward immediately and answered it.

"Hello, this is Carlisle Cullen answering for Edward Cullen. Hello Sue. Yes, they're here."

He froze. Exactly like Edward and Alice had.

"What is it?" Esme asked.

I wanted him to answer. I wanted to know immediately what was wrong and why no one would tell us.

"It's Charlie," Carlisle said in a low voice. "He's been kidnapped."

-

A comet could have landed outside and destroyed the world, we wouldn't have noticed. For all I cared, the world as we knew it had become a block of ice.

We all sat frozen, not moving. We stayed that way for several minutes before I got it through my teeth: "Who? Who did it?"

Of course, I already knew the answer.

"I cannot know for sure," Alice whispered. "I don't see clearly. But he's going somewhere dark. I _think_ it's the Volturi. But who else could it be?"

"Friends of James? Victoria?" Jasper asked. I could hear that he knew it was unlikely, but he hoped it. He hoped that it was that simple.

"It's them," I murmured darkly, feeling as if my eyes were too dry. I couldn't let go of the grief that was building inside me, the self-loathing. "It's the Volturi."

Edward nodded. "It is."

"But … Would they really move so soon?" Esme said, trying to find another solution to the situation. "Time is something different to them, even more different than it is to us."

"Bloodsuckers," Jacob breathed. "Leaches."

"Vultures," I gave in. "That's what they are. They wait for the remaining, and then they take it."

I knew what they wanted, and I grasped around my daughter even harder.

Aro wanted _us_. Even if he had to kill Carlisle. He'd tried before. There was nothing he wanted more than Alice. My shield would be exquisite to him. It would be the ultimate protection. Edward would be a welcome addition. And Renesmee …

Renesmee would be the pearl in his collection, the most special thing he had collected.

The Cullens were like a goldmine to him, he only had to reach us to take us. We'd have no choice in the end.

"We have to do something!" I shouted, letting all my anger and fear run out through my mouth instead of my tear cannels. "We have to save him!"

"Bella," Carlisle murmured.

"I know what you're going to say! He's old and it's too dangerous. But we can't let them do this!" I cried.

"Bella," Edward murmured, and I turned my attention to him. "They've been looking for this. An opportunity. We practically gave it to them. They'll say Charlie knows what we are. And humans aren't allowed to know …"

I froze. I hadn't looked at it that way until now.

Of course.

Of course they'd say that. They'd found the hole they'd been looking for.

"No," I whispered. "Not again! Not again!"

I cradled Renesmee in my arms and stared helplessly at Jacob. He stared back, probably as terrified as I was. Not for himself or the family, for Renesmee. All the other stuff was insignificant beside her.

I begged him. I begged him with my eyes to take care of her. Run with her, as we'd originally planned back when this first happened.

He knew. He accepted. He agreed.

He nodded.

"We should call the others," Jasper stated.

"Yes," Alice whispered. "They'll say yes. That was their decision. Should this ever happen again, they'd help us."

"Not all of them," Edward said trough gritted teeth. "This is not the same. This is war. This _will_ end in a battle."

"Edward!" Carlisle said sternly. "We don't know that. We should _avoid_ that!"

"What other end do _you_ see, Carlisle?" Edward asked. "They won't just give us Charlie."

"I say we take them down," Emmett growled. "We take them down for good this time! We have Bella! They can't do anything to us this time!"

"But we're still too few number-wise," Rosalie noted. "Bella's shield will only even us ability-wise, but not with size. They're still more than us."

"But not stronger!" Emmett decided.

"Don't be stupid!" Rosalie snorted, crossing her arms.

She acted annoyed and angry, but I could see in her eyes that she was worried, too. Very worried.

"What do we do?" Esme asked.

"We contact the others first," Carlisle said in a firm voice, so that we would all listen. Everyone lifted their heads toward our father and leader, willing to do what he told us to. "Then we go to Forks. We have to speak with Sue and the wolves. Then we have to find more allies. I know that there are strong possibilities for a fight, so we have to be prepared. If we are not enough, a fight is inevitable. If we're enough, our numbers might make them hesitate like last time, and we can negotiate."

"They're not interested in that," I murmured. "It is as Emmett is saying; we have to destroy them! If we don't, they'll just keep doing this!"

Jasper nodded. "We should at least take out their keypoints. Demetri, Jane and Alex."

Emmett was just about to open his mouth when Carlisle cut us off: "Before we start planning tactics," he said in a harsh tone, "we should try finding enough allies. We should try for making them negotiate."

"What if we won't negotiate?" I asked, and everyone looked at me. "I won't stand for this anymore! I want it over with! We can't allow them to keep threatening us!"

I felt Renesmee's arms tighten around me. "Mom," she whispered, her voice begging me not to say such things. But I wouldn't listen. I would fight to protect her and my family. I looked at Edward, who was looking back at me. We would fight together.

"Now, now," Esme cut in. "Let's do what Carlisle proposes first before we go to any drastic measures."

Emmett gave out a big, unhappy sigh before groaning. "As always."

"Fine. Let's get ready to go to Forks," Carlisle said in a serious tone, before he turned toward me. He put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it before he continued up the stairs.

----

Thanks for all the reviews! Made me so happy!

Yay! New chapter! I know it's not as long as the other chapters, but it was fun :) I hope you enjoyed it. Just so you know, I'm so evil I actually considered stopping the chapter after Carlisle sais that Charlie got kidnapped. But I wanted to keep writing. So … Yea, tell me what you think xD

Cake if you do!

Dawn


	10. Chapter 9

9. DESPERATE PLANS

"Okay. Fine. We'll be there in …" Jacob looked at Edward, who implied the number with his fingers. "_Seven hours?_ Can't we go faster?"

"It's a long way," Carlisle said. "And we have to be on guard for the Volturi.

"Jacob, give me the phone," Alice demanded, instantly forcing it out of his hands so quickly that he didn't even notice what happened. "Hey, Sam, this is Alice. We'll be there in six or seven hours, see you later." She pressed the button. "There. We have to hurry. You're taking more time than you're giving, dog. Now, for how we're going to do this," she continued, giving Jacob back the cell. "You, Jacob, will be running about a mile away from us to make my vision as clear as possible The rest of us will run in formation."

Carlisle took the word then." I'll run in the front, Esme right behind me, Bella and Alice in the middle, Emmett and Jasper at the sides, and Rosalie and Edward in the back. Bella, you have to keep your shield constant. I know it'll drain you, but –"

"I can do it," I said. I didn't look up from where I was sitting. "What about Renesmee?" I was honestly more concerned about my daughter than my own well doing right now.

"She'll be with Jacob," Carlisle responded.

My head snapped up. "That's out of my range!" I implied through gritted teeth.

"She makes my vision fuzzy," Alice apologized.

"Then look _around_ it!"

"Mom, it's okay," Renesmee said, smiling at me, but I just got to me feet and walked to her side with firm steps.

"No. Renesmee has to be in my range, or I won't allow it," I clarified, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Mom, you don't have to worry about me. It's just six –"

"Seven."

"Hours," she continued, ignoring me. She tried to warm me up with a little smile, but I tried not to fall for it.

"It's not just seven hours," I said. "It's the Volturi. We don't know who it is. It could be Jane, and –"

"I can do this." She looked at me with honest eyes, and I sighed. I knew she had to take care of herself sometimes, too, but why did it have to be now?  
"Fine," I muttered spitefully, turning back towards Edward. He put his arm around my shoulder and squeezed it, as Jacob and Renesmee ran off.

"Let's go," Carlisle said.

We formed our traditional formation and set off without saying any more, except for an occasional question to Alice about her visions, which were dark and unclear.

As predicted, I got serious pain that reminded me vaguely of being human, only worse. It was like there was a thunderstorm in my head, but I kept it up all the way to Forks. I tried several times to reach out towards Jacob and Renesmee, but it was a lost cause, so I was relieved when we arrived without any troubles.

Yet.

It was a home-like feeling that crept over me as we came nearer to Forks. The snow was falling as if someone high above was spreading white powder over the earth. I knew it was supposed to be cold, but every time a snowflake touched my skin, it was like a warm finger slightly ran over it. While being human, I had never really liked snow, but through my years as a vampire, I had come to enjoy snow quite a lot. It was beautiful and warm, and it generally meant that the sun wouldn't be out too much, which was bad in our lifestyle.

The wolves would be waiting for us just a while away, and then we would be safe. Sort of.

We were very close to Forks when it happened.

Alice had a vision that made her stop abruptly. She didn't respond to our questions, but just looked at Edward, who nodded.

"To Forks. Then we'll explain," he said, and we all ran as fast as we could. It made me worry very much about Renesmee and Jacob, but we arrived in Forks without encountering whatever Alice had seen.

"So what was it? Did we avoid it?" Rosalie asked.

"No," Edward responded.

"It's coming," Alice said.

"What's coming, dear?" Esme asked, rubbing Alice's back. I instinctively did the same with Renesmee.

"They'll come in a few hours, at midnight. A few miles away. They know I can see them. They're expecting us to come, or they'll emerge."

Esme looked up at Carlisle, who nodded. "We have to go," he declared.

I nodded. "Good! Then we'll –"

"You'll not be participating in the meeting, Bella," Carlisle interrupted me.

I was dumbfounded. It was the first time since I was human that I was being left out, and it was a strange feeling of Déjà vu.

"No!" I protested, stepping toward him with closed fists. I stopped after one step, though, to not give off the wrong image.

"Bella –"

"I'm not staying behind again! He's my dad! And I have the shield!"

"You and Edward will be staying behind with Rosalie. You'll be close enough for your shield to reach us, but far enough away that you won't do anything drastic," he told me.

I gritted my teeth. I was trying hard not to let my anger get the best side of me. I knew exactly why Rosalie was going to be with us. She would be holding me back if I tried to attack. Edward couldn't be trusted with that job.

"Fine!" I spat, bowing my head so my hair would hide my face.

Carlisle breathed deeply.

"Fine. Then let's meet with the wolves."

-

They were all there. Even Leah, who didn't go back to the reservation often. She probably checked in with Jacob more often than with her mother.

"How's Sue taking it?" I asked her.

Leah still didn't like me, just as she never had, but we at least were as decent towards each other to be polite.

"She's taking it hard, but she always gets by," she answered. I nodded.

I should learn from Sue. I'd always known I'd have to leave Charlie behind some day. I should have been prepared.

But I wasn't. It was hard to say goodbye to someone who wasn't gone.

"So it's them again?" Sam spat out, obviously disgusted. "Well, can't you just gather up the other vamps again? Didn't they say that they'd help if anything like what happened last time was happening again?"

"They did, and we're going to contact them all just like last time," Carlisle answered. "Those we are sure will help us, anyway. But the Volturi is on the run again, and this time they'll have something clever up their sleeve. They didn't choose Charlie out of coincidence."

"We know," Sam nodded. "So we should begin making plans for our encounter with them."

Strategy wasn't something I was particularly interested in at the moment. I was very distracted by the thought of Charlie and what they could have done with him. The thought of not being able to encounter the Volturi at midnight was also frustrating, and the whole non-violent politic Carlisle was going on about was just fine, but I didn't think that the Volturi should get to do any more of their little tricks. I knew many would agree with us.

But then again …

It was the fear for the Volturi that kept our world in balance. The southern vampires and Jasper's story were stories to back up this theory.

So whoever took down the Volturi would have to take their place, or chaos would break out.

I shook my head. There shouldn't need to be someone to rule. The vampires should just make it out on their own and make sure nobody became too visible to the humans.

"Bella, its time." I felt Rosalie's hand on my shoulder, and I looked up at her face. The stars and the moon had come out, and in the strange light of the night, her hair looked like silver, and her skin was shining in a strange way. She was even more breathtaking than usually.

I nodded to mark that I was ready, and then we took off to encounter the Volturi, leaving the wolves behind. If we let them go with us, it would only bring problems. I was happy that both Renesmee and Jacob were staying behind. It made it a bit easier to know that Renesmee wasn't close to the vultures that wanted to steal her.

Edward, Rosalie and I went to a place about five hundred meters away. Edward took my hand, and Rosalie placed one of her own on my shoulder. I tried to ignore them both and just concentrate on my shield.

Then they formed out from the shadows.

I was suddenly glad that Edward and Rosalie was holding me back. My muscles automatically tightened, and I was fighting very hard with the part of myself that wanted to attack the three bodies wearing the wavering, black cloaks that I despised more than anything in the world.

I hissed through my teeth as Carlisle began to step closer to them. Why was Jasper and Emmett staying behind? I knew we didn't want a fight, but … Seeing Carlisle stand there, unprotected. It was uprooting.

At the same time that Edward squeezed my hand, Rosalie squeezed my shoulder, and I tried to relax.

Jane was among them, of course. And Demetri. The third one I didn't remember, but he was a big guy. Considering that they knew about my shield, they had probably taken someone with a physical gift with them.

They weren't taking our friendly actions into their calculations, and Jane raised her hand. Edward winced and sent me a glance. I felt her attack before he even turned towards me.

So it was going to be that way.

Carlisle stepped back, and both Emmett and Jasper stepped forward so that they were on his sides. They were crouched down, ready for a sudden attack.

"You have crossed the last line," Jane said with a smirk on her face. "No matter the shield, your last time is drawing closer."

"What did you do with Charlie?" Carlisle cut her off. She looked displeased.

"Right where anyone that knows our secret should be," she snarled. "You've been getting around the rules easily the last many years, but that ends now. You will all turn into ashes soon. We will find your other human friends, too, and those mongrels that calls themselves shape-shifters shouldn't feel too safe, either. But …" Her newly found smirk disappeared again, and Edward growled at my side.

"What is it?" Rosalie whispered.

"But you still have a last chance for redemption," Demetri said. "Aro would like to see several of your family members among our ranks. We'd gladly let the rest of you go freely if you decided to obey the rules from now on." He smiled. "We know they're down there." He nodded towards us. "Why don't they come and see us? Or doesn't Edward want his precious Bella notta in danger?" he grinned. "Isn't just her name a sign? I'm certain that her soul is crying for Italy."

Edward's snarl was so low that it was hard to hear, even to me, but when I turned my face towards him, I saw the hate and fury that had build up through the years. And the fear. The fear f losing someone … To them. I knew it all too well.

"I hate to say it," Rosalie murmured in a low, nasty voice, "but I think we'll seriously need the wolves this time."

Knowing Rosalie, this was when it got really serious on her part.

"If they think they can separate us …"

Rosalie's hand on my shoulder turned more protective than withholding, and she stepped a bit further, as if she was trying to shield me. Her jaw was set in a tight line, and by instinct I grabbed her arm, restraining her from doing something … me'ish.

"You don't know Bella at all!" Alice said, and Emmett made an agreeing noise.

Demetri snorted. "You're all dead. Enjoy your last time in this world. Enjoy your last time with your precious treasures." His smile was the one of a devil's. I bit down my lip as they drew back, and then I gasped.

"What is it, Bella?" Edward asked.

"Treasures," I whispered. "Renesmee."

Both Rosalie and Edward froze beside me. The others could also hear us, but the Volturi was probably too far away.

I ran from them and towards Alice, who grabbed me in a tight embrace.

"Your soul doesn't cry for Italy, does it, Bella?" she whispered. I could hear that she was really upset. She wasn't acting, as she sometimes did.

I padded her back. "I certainly don't," I responded. "Although I never got to travel a lot," I added jokingly.

She growled. "You saw enough last time, didn't you?"

I nodded.

"Alice," Edward hurriedly cut us off. "You have to look out for Renesmee! They're not going to let her get away this time."

Alice nodded. "I know."

"Let's get back," Carlisle suggested in a hard voice, and we didn't have to say a word of agreement before we were on our way again.

-

I lay on my back with closed eyes, resting. I was tired after all the work in the last twenty four hours, and the sound of the waves helped soothing me.

"So you went here?"

Jacob's voice was easy to recognize anywhere, and I sighed. I had just wanted to be alone, thinking of nothing, especially not Renesmee. And Jacob always reminded me of her.

"This is our place," he noted.

I snorted. "Technically, wouldn't it be yours and Renesmee's?"

He sighed. "Don't discount the memories. They belong to you, not Renesmee."

I met his eyes with a tired nod, and then I yawned.

He raised an eyebrow. "Did you just … yawn? Weird …"

"Yea, but I'm really tired, so you've gotta get it out somehow," I responded. He was right. It was weird.

I closed my eyes again.

"How's it like?" he asked. "Not being able to sleep?"

"It's nice to be able to be awake for so long, but sometimes it would be nice to drift off to a dream, a nicer place … Though the last many years I haven't felt that way, I feel it now. I think that it might be the hardest part, actually. Not being able to escape reality …"

He shrugged, not being able to relate to me at all.

"But then again, I'm very young, so you really should be asking someone like Carlisle," I noted.

"Carlisle's not agonized enough," he said.

I cough a laugh, trying to hold it back.

"It's true," he stated.

"I know."

He picked up a handful of sand and let it fall through his fingers. When all the sand was gone, he picked up a new handful and did the same again. He continued he routine.

"I hate them," he finally said.

I straightened up. "We all do."

"Not as much as I do! What if …" He looked away. "What if they take her?" he whispered.

I hit him.

"Ouch! What did you do that for?" he shouted.

"You really think you're the one having the hardest time?" I growled at him, furious. How could he be so infuriating? "I'm her mother! I was willing to die for her from the beginning, when you wanted her dead! Not only that, I do not _only_ worry about her, I worry about the entire family! We all do! Except for you! Stop being so selfish!"

He looked into my eyes with a strange expression, like he was looking at a child.

"I'm not only worried about Renesmee," he told me harshly. "I'm worried about you, too." He took my hand and clapped it. "Very, actually. You're worrying so much, you feel that it's all your fault – again – and you –"

"How could I _not_?" I cried. "I keep bringing everyone in danger, and everyone keeps telling me that it isn't my fault, but –"

"Bella, shut up," he cut me off, and I stopped, surprised at his choice of words. "We all love you." He put his hand on my head. "You brought us together. Don't think you can just ruin it." He grinned and then got up.

"Moron," I sighed.

"Bloodsucker," he called back to me as he left.

-

The idea hit me in the middle of the night, when I was reminiscing the last time the Volturi meant to attack us. We were taking a break from making plans so that everyone could clear their thoughts, and that was exactly what I was doing.

We had already agreed on gathering the vampires that had helped us the last time, but we were also thinking about how to gather more. The Volturi was sure to be prepared for my shield and our other merits. They'd be ready with some counterattack that would nail us to the ground.

But there was one thing that nobody had considered yet.

I would need a special setup for this plan, and it wasn't going to be easy. We had to be few and agile. We couldn't cut corners on this one.

It was a desperate plan, a plan that wasn't even sure to succeed. But wasn't all of them?

I had to try it.

-

"What are you doing?" Alice asked in a whisper. "What have you decided now? I'm going with you."

"What did you see?" I asked with narrowed eyes.

"Nothing," Alice answered. "That's the problem. You all just disappeared."

"I know what I'm doing, and they'll agree, just as you just told me."

She shook her head. "I know why you're not telling me, but why can't you trust me?"

"Because everything depends on you and Edward not knowing anything," I responded.

She bit down her bottom lip.

"Don't tell him," I whispered, looking at her with begging eyes. "I need him with Renesmee. And I can't put him in this kind of danger on a whim."

She raised an eyebrow. "Didn't you want to become a vampire to always be with him."

I looked away. "When it comes to the Volturi … Things are different. You need him more than I will."

"As long as Edward is with us, our thoughts are not safe," she said.

"As long as he's away from you, your thoughts still aren't safe, and their minds will be closed," I pointed out.

She sighed. "I'll stay away from him until you leave," she promised.

"Give him this," I told her. I gave her a little letter that I had written. I hoped that it wouldn't give off too much.

She nodded. Her face was turned away, but I knew that expression, and I carefully put my arms around her, as if she could break any moment.

"Tell Jasper I'll bring his teachings honor," I murmured.

She smiled.

"I will."

I nodded.

And then I parted with Alice.

I went to find the two members of my family that were the ones who would help me on my mission. Emmett and Rosalie.

I searched for them for about five minutes before I found their scent and followed it. I wasn't lucky enough to find them separated from Edward, but I would find a way.

"Rose! Emmett!" I called. "I feel like going hunting. What about you?"

All three of them raised their eyebrows. I tried to act as normal as I could, but I was apparently overdoing it.

I tried to do it better and turned towards Edward. "Renesmee is looking for you."

"Why?" he asked. "Is something wrong?" his expression turned anxious.

I shook my head. "I just think she wanted to talk with you about something. She's by the beach, I think."

He nodded and was already off.

"So you want to go?" I asked and grabbed Emmett's hand in one of my own and Rosalie by the other. Before they could answer I was already dragging them with me.

They seemed to understand, by the way I was urging them forward, that this was not just a hunting trip. There was more to it.

We had run for a good five miles when Rosalie asked: "Where are we going, Bella?"

They had understood, then. They knew they had been dragged into a mission that the others mustn't know of.

I let go of them but didn't stop running.

"We have to get as far as possible so Edward can't follow us," I told them. "When we get to Oregon, I'll tell you everything."

Time passed by both too quickly and too slowly. Every step was taking me closer to a new part of my life, a dangerous one, and every step closer to that took me away from Edward and Renesmee. I would soon be with them again, I told myself, but I knew that I shouldn't count on it. There could go a long time.

_I should have stayed_, I thought to myself, but I knew that the battle would be a lost cause then, and we'd all die anyway.

"Tell us," Emmett told me impatiently when we passed the border. He could sense that I wasn't going to be using the Carlisle-style. This was exactly one of the reasons why I'd chosen Emmett for this mission.

"Werewolves," I answered. We'd slowed a bit down, but we didn't stop.

"Werewolves?" Rosalie asked.

"We just left them," Emmett pointed out, looking backwards.

"Aro called them shape shifters. Caius hates the werewolves. The werewolves must hate Caius and the Volturi. There must be very few of them left, if not none," I explained.

"Then why are we looking for something that might not be there?" Rosalie asked.

"It's like when Alice went to look for others like Renesmee. She didn't know if she could find any, but she knew that if she did, it would change everything." I took in a deep breath. "We need more than those we already have to fight with us, if we want to win without many losses, and we need a _lot_ more for no losses. If we can communicate with the werewolves … We might have a chance."

"But Aro called them the Children of the Moon," Rosalie pointed out. "They only change with the full moon."

"It's worth a shot, isn't it?" I asked. "And they might have changed physically in their human form, too, like the shape shifters." I shrugged. "We need help. We're going to get it.

Oh, by the way, I wrote to Edward that we'd tell Zafrina about this and sent them on the way if we could find them."

"So it's to the Amazonas first?" Rosalie asked.

I nodded. "And then we're going to take a swim over the Atlanta."

Emmett snickered. "Finally," he boomed. "Something will finally be done."

--

Let me explain why I haven't uploaded for this and Newborn in a while now: my computer got a virus, and it deleted everything. I'm lucky I had most of my work on my laptop, but a LOT has been lost, including my notes for both of these fanfics. Which sort of knocked the breath out of me.

Plus, A Different World is taking the best of me.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I really like Winternight a lot more than Newborn, but that's apparently just me xD

I'll try to get a chapter up for Newborn soon.

I think this chapter went rather well, thought it might have seemed a bit rushed, but it is pretty late over here xD

Review. Please?

Dawn ^^


	11. The End

Dear readers of Twilight After Dawn Winternight

Those of you reading Newborn will already know what this is about. Despite my many promises to finish my Twilight projects, these are not promises that I can keep. Saying it really hurts, because it means leaving be something that I should have finished.

But I can't. Neither Newborn nor Winternight will be finished, and my story "A different world" will be drastically shortened.

For all this, my deepest apologies. Know that this journey of writing for you guys have been something amazing to me, and it holds a deep significance in my heart, because you helped me get a little closer to what I want to be as a writer.

I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

Lythya

Ps. I will also post the notes for the last chapters for Winternight, as I'll do with newborn.


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